A Trio Of Limericks For Gay-Bashing Senator Larry Craig

I just couldn’t resist writing some limericks about the hypocritical, gay-bashing Senator Larry Craig:

A Trio Of Limericks For Idaho Senator Larry Craig
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Craig confessed to a crime in the loo
He proclaims that he never would do,
Cuz he’s straight as can be:
He was just there to pee,
And perversions he’d always eschew.

When Larry was under arrest,
He was stressed, which is why he confessed.
All his actions are pure
And he’s really demure
And not gay, except when he’s undressed.

Larry Craig says he has a wide stance
In the john when he zips down his pants:
He’s an innocent man.
His arrest in the can
Was an error, cuz Craig ain’t no nance.

Tags: , , , ,

16 Responses to “A Trio Of Limericks For Gay-Bashing Senator Larry Craig”

  1. PoliShifter says:

    Was he peeing in the wide stance or sitting in the wide stance?

  2. PoliShifter says:

    Those are great btw…

  3. ggMarley says:

    How about:

    After peeking inside the next loo,
    Larry began thumping his shoe.
    He signaled “I’m free”,
    Then out came ID.
    What’s a gay red state senator to do?

  4. madkane says:

    Thanks PoliShifter! And thanks ggMarley for posting your limerick. Isn’t Craig inspiring? :)

  5. micki says:

    There once was a senator who had to explain,
    I was making a “connection,” just catching a plane,
    I was taking a leak,
    Not copping a peek,
    But now my career is flushed down the drain.

  6. Steve Bates says:

    Said the lusty old Senator Craig,
    “I cain’t help it… I’m wide in the laig,
    An’ whatever they sez,
    Not as bad as the Prez,
    Who belongs in the dock in The Hague!”

    – SB the YDD

  7. madkane says:

    Fun one, Steve! Thanks for posting!

  8. madkane says:

    Thanks, micki for your verse. This is fun. Please keep them coming, folks!

  9. micki says:

    There once was a senator who went tap, tap, tap,
    He put his foot in his mouth with a guilty plea rap,
    Not charged with pederasty,
    He commited a “tapestry”
    Weaving a ridiculous story thus spreading more crap!

  10. dejah says:

    Sen. Craig is now on the spot
    For soliciting sex from the pot
    But Vitter stays in
    despite his own sin
    While Craig gets ejected like snot.

  11. micki says:

    There once was a guy in diapers named Vitter,
    Showed up on “the” phone list and all went a’twitter,
    He stuck with the gals,
    So Repugs stayed pals,
    But Craig gets thrown over for being a switch-hitter!

  12. Marco says:

    A Senator of the god-fearing Right
    Checked first that his boy toy was tight
    ‘Cause homosexuality’s a sin
    Especially when it’s open
    Best to keep our little thing out of sight

  13. Marco says:

    A down low b.j.’s alright
    As long as this doesn’t see light
    I’m a straight man you see
    Clean. Moral. GOP!
    I fight the good fight. Don’t bite.

  14. Alex says:

    Larry Craig went to the loo
    And tapped on another man’s shoe
    He reached with his hand
    but the man was a cop
    what’s one more closeted republican to do?

  15. Marc says:

    There once was a Senator from Boise
    Who was taking a flight from Joyzie
    He sat in a stall
    Leaned under the wall
    And was arrested for being too nosey.

  16. rnelsonbrown says:

    Very nice.

    Ted Haggard said he too didn’t do
    All those things that the news said were true
    The boy, his masseuse
    Was his excuse
    And like Bill, he don’t inhale or screw.

    Where do lawyers go for rehab? Liar’s Anon? Hi, my name is Ray, but i am going to talk about Bob, or Ralph, or Susan, because anything about me is inadmissible. And by the way, who do i bill? rnelsonbrown