Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: ROAD or RODE or ROWED at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using ROAD or RODE or ROWED at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

Said a sandal-clad man on the road
To his newly bought country abode,
“Though I don’t mean to quibble,
I just felt a nibble.
Could my toes have encountered a toad?”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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65 Responses to “Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: ROAD or RODE or ROWED at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5”

  1. David Reddekopp says:

    I wrote this one about a month ago:

    He humped her quite hard; never slowed
    And later he let loose his load.
    But then, they were struck
    By an oncoming truck
    They shouldn’t have forked in the road.

  2. David Reddekopp says:

    The whore made the men all explode
    But she took some time off, and it showed
    Said her customer, Dusty:
    “My God, you’re so rusty
    I think you’re about to erode.”

  3. Bob Leggett says:

    A lady called Dorothy Spode
    Would only converse in Morse code
    Thinking quick as a flash
    I said Dot I must dash
    As I disappeared up the road

  4. Brian Allgar says:

    The Romans who’d captured them crowed
    As the Britons were led down the road,
    No longer in hue
    A belligerent blue,
    For they’d come to the end of the woad.

  5. Brian Allgar says:

    He would sing to the girl he bestrode
    Little ditties in popular mode.
    When her mouth opened wide,
    He would slip it inside
    As he sang “Can you carry my load?” *

    (* Google says it’s a song by Confrontation Camp, whoever they may be)

  6. Brian Allgar says:

    The bimbo who lived down the road
    Had invited him to her abode.
    He began to caress her,
    But failed to undress her –
    He just couldn’t find the zip code.

  7. Zelick Mendelovich says:

    It Cometh Back To Bite

    was a God who would giggle and goad
    ” precious people don’t stray from my road,
    cause hot brimstone and hail
    will be close on your tail!”
    – “What you saw, you will reap, you big toad!”

    In lay terms, they told him – he owed,
    his failure to clauses he stowed
    when making first man –
    now black pot to pan:
    “A shrink just might lighten your load!”

  8. Brian Allgar says:

    The cock was a well-endowed Rhode
    Island Red; when he strutted and crowed,
    All the lusty young hens
    Would break out of their pens
    In the hope of receiving his load.

  9. Judith H. Block says:

    We walk down a long, winding road
    If enduring life, we are bestowed
    Sometimes potholes are hit
    That test our true grit
    We can’t let the journey implode.

  10. Judith H. Block says:

    His passionate kisses, bestowed
    She felt such a thrill as he rode.
    With pleasure he cried
    And exploded inside
    Then he felt like a heavy dead load.

  11. Judith H. Block says:

    They committed a murder and rowed
    Away, but their lives would implode.
    The Thérèse Raquin plot
    All future joy shot
    Until their sad lives would explode.

  12. Kirk Miller says:

    In the headlights of cars, something showed.
    It was just up ahead, so I slowed.
    Saw a pie in the street
    That I wanted to eat,
    So I looked for a fork in the road.

  13. Brian Allgar says:

    They were doing it right in the road
    When a lorry appeared. Though it slowed,
    They were locked in coition,
    A complex position,
    And ended squashed flat as a toad.

  14. Jesse Levy says:

    I was walking a mystical road
    When approached by a talking toad
    He said, “You can’t pass
    Lest you kiss my ass.”
    I turned and off quickly I strode.

  15. Brian Allgar says:

    The slave-master wielded his goad
    As the galley-slaves frantically rowed.
    Though he screamed “WTF?”,
    They were hopessly stuck,
    For the anchor still hadn’t been stowed.

  16. colonialist says:

    They fought; with each other they rowed …
    What? You say this isn’t allowed?
    But when I rode this road
    I just followed your code
    And, really do think, did it proud.

  17. Paul Dickey says:

    I’ve been traveling long down this road.
    Soon the Lord’s gonna say, “Drop your load.”
    But before I leave,
    let me say, “ I believe
    I heard sounds where the river had flowed.“

  18. Don Lee says:

    Mad Kane’s got us on the write road
    and with words up stream we rowed
    puns and colorful expressions we submit
    with blood, sweat, tears and some wit
    each week we click in to be towed

  19. Brian Allgar says:

    The beta test went on the road
    For their app: “Win A Prince, Kiss The Toad’.
    But no prince came; instead,
    Roaches bit off her head.
    They suspect there are bugs in the code.

  20. Brian Allgar says:

    Mr Fields was heard to explode:
    “Though the sturgeon is lavishly roe’d
    And makes caviar – Beluga,
    Oscietra, Sevruga –
    It’s filthy stuff! Fish eggs be blowed!”

    (Despite the (vastly overrated) wonders of Google, I can’t find the W.C. Fields film where he looks disgustedly at caviar and says “Fish eggs!” Can anyone remind me?)

  21. Patricia Campbell says:

    His legs, poor old Hank, they was bowed
    from all of the critters he rode
    But the widest by far
    Was old Sue from the bar
    to move her she had to be towed

  22. Tanja Cilia says:

    Said the dame on a horse that she rode
    To the child on the cart that it towed
    If you fall off, beware
    Of the ogres out there
    And Braveheart, face painted with woad.

  23. Mark Kane says:

    “Seek the new,” she harangued as it snowed.
    So we rode on a less traveled road.
    Melting snow caused a flood,
    Leaving us stuck in mud.
    I heeded her goad and got towed.

  24. Kirk Miller says:

    The petrologist found out he owed
    I.R.S. lots of money. He showed
    Them he’s deeply in debt.
    It’s for sure you can bet
    That he’s traveling on a rocky road.

  25. yt cai says:

    Castration was poor Elmer’s load
    Replaced them with a chrome anode
    He totes them around
    They scraped on the ground
    When his lug nuts began to corrode

  26. yt cai says:

    Flattened out right there in the road
    Were remains of a pokey horn toad
    As it turns out it died
    Getting to other side
    Where a chicken had already strode

  27. Young Patrick had drank quite a load
    The bartender stated, he owed
    Pat took out his pence
    twas good common sense
    ’cause the barmaid gave one for the road

  28. Errol Nimbly says:

    He goes thundering down Thunder Road,
    And White Lightning is part of his load.
    (Seen him take a few swigs.)
    He hauls clippings and twigs
    From the neighborhood lawns he has mowed.

  29. Brian Allgar says:

    Said the Owl as the Pussycat rowed,
    “I would help you, to lighten your load,
    But I’ve injured my back,
    And it’s time for my snack –
    Now, where is that honey you stowed?”

  30. Susan Settje says:

    Dame Judi was crossing the road
    When a cabbie bore down where she strode.
    He swerved and he swore,
    The Dame evened the score–
    Lady Dench, she was quick to unload.

  31. Religious observance is owed
    Where the poultry truck buckled and bowed.
    Her companions are splats
    On the highway, and that’s
    Why the Chicken was Crossing the Road.

  32. (OOC, as Brian beat me to it — )

    “Climate change?” cried the rich. “What a load…”
    ‘Til the caviar industry slowed.
    Now the sturgeon are dying,
    There’s just no denying
    We’re reaching the end of the roe’d.

  33. Suzanne Heymann says:

    My Bermuda grass lawn must be mowed
    The rhizomes are into the road
    I wish I could wait
    ‘Cause my health ain’t that great
    But it’s time that I reap what I’ve sowed.

  34. Suzanne Heymann says:

    John Steinbeck wrote well and it showed
    His “Grapes of Wrath” featured Tom Joad
    Okies felt lots of scorn
    Headed toward Californ’
    Which they reached by the old “Mother Road.”

    That’s Route 66, almost entirely replaced by Interstates now.

  35. David Reddekopp says:

    Down a straight city street I once strode
    Found some women in which to unload
    Now I know I’m not wrong;
    It’s the place I belong
    So I said, “Take me home, cuntry road.”

    Yes, the typo is intentional.

  36. David Reddekopp says:

    At the cabin, my country abode
    I had time to relax and reload
    Towed the boat to the pond
    My lifejacket I donned
    So I rode down the road, and then rowed.

  37. Kirk Miller says:

    University dorm, my abode,
    In New Orleans has a zip code
    On a street with one lane
    Each direction. It’s plain
    It is located on a Tulane road.

  38. In Chicago when it snowed
    My Honda had to be towed
    It went to Okie Fanokie
    Instead of Skokie
    That’s a little too far down the road

  39. I met my “Prince” down the road
    A ring to me he bestowed
    My credit cards were gone
    Checking account was withdrawn
    My prince turned into toad

  40. We went down the country road
    On a Harley that never slowed
    I’m kind of large
    Built like a barge
    And the bike indicated “Heavy Load”

  41. Bjorn says:

    A princess dressed up a la mode
    a morning was walking the road
    that lead to the pond
    and under a frond
    she found her a lover disguised as a toad

  42. Gayle Walters Rose says:

    a cat sat smack dab in the road
    licking and preening real slow
    he was so one-pointed
    that he failed to notice
    a semi bearing down with his load

  43. I sang my song on the road
    as I slipped him a 20, he crowed
    He gave me a flirt
    and kicked up some dirt
    as he undid his pants and bowed

  44. Dark night.. moss tickles face cross road..
    Oh.. the smell.. of hell splayed flesh mode..
    Where pain.. ceases.. and all is paper know..
    no move.. no feeling.. existence dark glows
    deeper rings of Dante.. Inferno winds blow..:)

    Bottom of pit.. never ends.. falling crawling low..
    a second becomes an hour.. a thousand years oh..
    please let me go.. i cannot stay a thousand goes..
    on.. and on.. there is no end to darkness.. explodes..
    if only a prick.. a pin.. a stab.. a fire.. numb implodes..

    This is know.. no story.. it happens in 2008.. a bloke..
    sad man.. empty heart.. spirit extinguishes soul.. no..
    no time now.. now then is hell.. time never ends.. so..
    a moral to every story.. is where a human ends row..
    arise.. Ocean Flow.. Infinity never ends.. now is Hope..:)

  45. I met my true love on “Romance Road”
    A kiss to me he bestowed
    My jewelry was gone
    Bank account: withdrawn
    My darling prince turned into a toad

  46. In my long and winding abode
    A mad approached in a musical mode
    All I needed was love
    He was gentle as a dove
    Then he went back to Abbey Road

  47. Dave Johnson says:

    In his Indy car fantasy mode,
    They went thundering down a steep road.
    She remarked, with a frown
    “You better slow down –
    Or I’m gonna need a commode.”

  48. Dave Johnson says:

    When Lady Godiva bestowed
    Her charms on the town where she rode,
    They noticed a rise
    In amorous guys;
    Along with the seeds that they sowed.

  49. Tim James says:

    She was looking for sex on the road.
    He was just a bit strange, and it showed.
    So just why did he lick
    Ice cream off of this chick?
    He prefers all his tarts a la mode.

  50. kaykuala h says:

    On a lonely journey he rode
    But not familiar with the road
    He took a wild gamble
    At a bend he tumlbed
    Had to be in a vigilant mode


  51. The trick-or-treaters stopped at a scary abode
    To the door came a witch who looked like a toad
    They came down with cold feet
    Scared to ask for a treat
    Changed to frogs but, with candy they hopped down the road

  52. Mad: My DARLING prince turned into a toad (if you could fix it?)
    just add the word DARLING NEXT LIMERICK:

    I saw my mother-in-law down River Road
    We all agree she knows how to goad
    She is so obese:
    “A conversation piece”
    Because she has her own zip code

  53. not a duplicate

    In good ole Chicago when it snowed
    I had to have my Honda towed
    It went to Okie Fanokie
    Instead of Skokie
    That’s quite a distance down the road

  54. Dr. Goose says:

    A chicken was crossing the road
    When she got to the center and slowed.
    While there in the middle
    She pondered that riddle,
    Which even she couldn’t decode.

  55. Dr. Goose says:

    Said Bernie: “We’re all on a road
    To where social unrest may explode!
    Our econ position
    Recalls the condition
    Afflicting the family named Joad.”

  56. Dr. Goose says:

    Said Dad, at the wheel on the road:
    “If you kids have to use the commode,
    Since we ain’t near a rest
    It would be for the best
    If you opened the door while I slowed.”

  57. Errol Nimbly aka Byron Miller says:

    Paid a doxy just what she was owed,
    Then at sea, in my dinghy, got blowed;
    But the mutinous whore
    Swam away with an oar,
    He declared, as in circles he rowed.

  58. Errol Nimbly aka Byron Miller says:

    Paid a doxy just what she was owed,
    Then at sea, in my dinghy, got blowed;
    But the mutinous whore
    Swam away with an oar,
    Which explains why, in circles, I rowed.

    (preferred ending :)

  59. Suzanne Heymann says:

    Off into the sunset he rode
    As the heartbroken prince’s tears flowed
    The princess rebuked
    And summarily puked
    When her kiss turned him into a toad.

  60. Suzanne Heymann says:

    An accident covered the road
    ‘Twas too late for both cars to have slowed
    Each car did a swerve
    ‘Round that nasty sharp curve
    To avoid hitting one little toad.

  61. Suzanne Heymann says:

    The earthly goals some of us sowed
    Can burden with too big a load
    Our true celebration
    Is not destination
    But the journey that makes your life’s road.

  62. Suzanne Heymann says:

    My dead carload slowed, then got towed
    To my abode as it snowed down the road
    But the truck’s brakes went stiff
    And it rode off the cliff
    So then down the whole river it flowed.

  63. Suzanne Heymann says:

    As the neighbor’s damn rooster just crowed
    My horse galloped past down the road
    The rooster gave chase
    But got hoofed in the face
    Thought his head was about to explode.

    (true story; it happened when I was 16; almost had a nice poultry dinner that night)

  64. Allen Wilcox says:

    There once was a lady who rode
    With a smile on the back of a toad.
    They returned from the ride
    With the lady inside
    And no smile on the face of the toad.

    This is a takeoff on the classic limerick
    attributed to Cosmo Monkhouse:
    “There was a young lady from Niger…”

    Note: Monkhouse used the same word –
    tiger – to end both lines two and five.
    Hence the blasphemy exhibited here.

    Note: Evidently toads do not find ingesting
    ladies as pleasant as do tigers.

  65. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun week of limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners: Limerick of the Week 237.

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Limerick-Off Stride.