Limerick of the Week (103)

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off.

Congratulations to Ira Bloom, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:

A gay fellow often will drone,
How his Android, on ‘vibe,’ makes him groan.
“As in ‘moan?’” asks his guys,
“Also ‘large’” he replies.
“‘Groan’ and ‘grown;’ it’s a fab homophone.”

Congratulations to Tim James and Sue Dulley, who jointly win the Special Oscar-Themed Limerick Award for their respective funny limericks:

Tim James:

Though “Lincoln” showed craft and élan,
And by critics was much smiled upon,
Despite all the spinning
Its chances of winning
Argoing, Argoing, Argone.

Sue Dulley:

The nominees, spruced up and styled,
Past red carpet cam’ras have filed.
They sit in their places
With faux-serene faces,
While the audience goes Oscar-wild.

Congratulations to Edmund Conti, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for this funny limerick.

A fellow would constantly drone
On and on in the same monotone.
And to make matters worse,
He would do it in verse
In the voice of Sylvester Stallone.

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) SisterAE, Jim Gallagher, Craig Dykstra, Jamie Hutchinson, David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose, Robert Schwarztrauber, and Steve Whitred. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:

Sister AE:

A fellow who’d constantly drone
On the bagpipes when he was alone,
Had offended his girl
With the squeak and the skirl.
But he now tries his best to atone.

Jim Gallagher:

The airman maneuvered the drone
At his desk in an office, alone.
He struck them all dead
In an impulse of dread,
While he ordered Chinese on the phone.

Craig Dykstra:

Met this prig who just tended to drone
About surveys that “clearly have shown”
True New Yorkers have class,
But this wannabe ass
Really drives in each day from Bayonne.

Jamie Hutchinson:

Bend an ear to the paperclip drone:
By hook or by crook there’s a tone.
Those hairpins are bound
To report with some sound.
Why else would the French say “trombone”?

David Lefkovits:

A fellow who’d constantly drone
Of all the wild seeds he had sown
Increasingly found
That, as an old hound,
It’s harder to dig up a bone.

Robert Schwarztrauber:

A fellow who felt like a drone,
Rang the President up on the phone.
Said he wanted to spy
On his neighbor from high
When she’s out by the pool all alone.

Steve Whitred:

A woman would constantly drone
To her sis “Get a beau of your own”
Because, if she arose
To go powder her nose,
She’d return, and her date would be blown.

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.

In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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16 Responses to “Limerick of the Week (103)”

  1. Congratulations Ira, Edmund, Tim, Sue, and the HMs. It was lots of fun as we droned on and on…

  2. Congrats to the winners Ira, Tim, Sue, and Edmund…great limericks!
    And it’s an honor to be honorably mentioned. Thank you.

  3. Edmund Conti says:

    You like me! You really like me! Actually what Sally Field said was, “You like me right now, you like me!” So don’t go misquoting me.

  4. Jane Hoffman says:

    Congrats to everyone. Edmund, I like you right now, too. GREAT JOB, all of you!!!!!

  5. Johanna Richmond says:

    Very nice limericks everyone!! Congrats to Ira, Sue, Tim and the HM’s!

  6. Willy Turner (EWWBL) says:

    I am sending my congrats in verse.
    I’ll try to be concise and terse;
    So, now I do st8
    That each 1 was gr8.
    Sorry folks but those 8′s are a curse.

    Wait, I just tauta sumptin’ much woise,
    A Limericker with Brooklyn voice,
    Not Nassau or Bronx,
    Manhattan? No thonx,
    Or Staten Island dat’s close to New Jois.

  7. Edmund Conti says:

    Thanks, Willy, from a former New Joiseyite. Actually we prefer New Jerseyans. Of course, going back far enough, I’m a former Rhode Islander so you can just ignore me.

  8. Dr. Goose says:

    Congrats to the winners – clever verses all!

  9. Sue Dulley says:

    Thanks, I’m very honoured to be joint winner of the Oscar challenge, (Thank you to the academy, my agent etc. etc.) but just wish I’d given the nominees “mock-earnest” faces, then maybe one or two more people would have liked, really liked me – I bet everyone else except me thought of that.

  10. Ira Bloom says:

    Thanks, Maddy, for awarding first prize for the gratuitous self-referential use of ‘homophone’ as a homophone for ‘homo phone’. I don’t know whether to be proud or ashamed.

  11. Edmund Conti says:

    Proud or ashamed? I would say yes.

  12. Jamie Hutchinson says:

    bravo all … thanks mad!

  13. Placido DSouza says:

    I am new to this competition, and entered for the first time in the last contest.
    However I do not see it posted anywhere. I think it should be included somewhere to encourage more and better participation.

  14. madkane says:

    You’re welcome, everyone. Thanks again to all the winners!

  15. madkane says:

    Placido DSouza, re your comment, there’s a high level of participation in these Limerick-Offs, both on my blog and on Facebook. (I’m talking both quantity and quality.)

    But the more, the merrier. So by all means, feel free to help spread the word about these limerick challenges.

  16. Nessa says:

    Excellent limericks. Congrats to all the winners.