Uptight Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A gal who was very uptight…*

or

A man who was very uptight…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Uptight Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A gal who was very uptight
Had a hang-up concerning her height:
Five-foot-four was her claim —
Quite a stretch for a dame
Who looked like a 60-inch sprite.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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131 Responses to “Uptight Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. A gal who was very uptight
    Had never been out late at night
    Until she met a new beau
    Who took her dancing and so
    Now she’s not home until first light.

  2. kaykuala says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Didn’t bother what is right
    Knocked on the booze
    Was found to be loose
    Gave everyone a lot of fright

    Hank

  3. Rinkly Rimes says:

    A girl who was very uptight,
    Floated up on the string of a kite.
    And then there were rumours
    That she showed her bloomers!
    Oh what an unladylike sight!

  4. Rinkly Rimes says:

    I doubt if anyone alive now knows what ‘bloomers’ are (were) but here goes.

  5. hannah uk says:

    THE MAN ON MY RIGHT LOOKED UPTIGHT

    IT SEEMS THAT A SPRITE GAVE HIM FRIGHT

    HE SHUDDERED AND SHOOK

    TALKED GOBBLEDY-GOOK

    HE’LL NEVER AGAIN BE QUITE RIGHT

  6. hannah uk says:

    Hiya Mad,
    What fun and what an easy rhyme word you chose for us beginners. I’ll be limericking all day now :-)

  7. Amarnath Mukhopadhyay says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Wasn’t sure about her right
    To bear a child in her womb.
    Pity that she lacked aplomb
    Only God can make her right.

  8. A girl who was very uptight
    When her boyfriend asked if he might,
    With the utmost of care,
    Fondle her sweet pair,
    Found the feeling to be a delight.

  9. Amarnath Mukhopadhyay says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Suffered always from a fright.
    Being a thief he knew the fact
    That he’ll be jailed for his act
    He did surrender as his right.

  10. Mark Kane says:

    A gal who was very uptight,
    Discovered Tequila one night.
    Soon she danced on the bar,
    And had sex in some car.
    You could say she was “high as a kite”.

  11. Mark Kane says:

    A gal who was often uptight,
    Was inspired by sweet aphrodite.
    Once with hubby alone,
    She unplugged the phone,
    And pleasured him all through the night.

  12. A gal who is very uptight
    Won’t take off her clothes when it’s light
    The chick only strips
    In a solar eclipse,
    Or perhaps in a blackout, she might

  13. Mark Kane says:

    A gal who was often uptight,
    Developed a strange appetite.
    For werewolves and vampires,
    And all that inspires,
    She now seems to live bite to bite.

  14. A gal who was very uptight
    Met a man whom she thought Mister Right,
    But with sex, in the end,
    When the gal would not bend,
    He escaped in the midst of the night.

  15. A mom who was very uptight
    Never let her kids out of her sight.
    To each big event
    She quite happily went,
    Even there on their honeymoon night!

  16. J Sardo says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Let her hair down one steamy night
    Screw the pills to the end
    I’ve turned round the bend
    A new follow has ended my plight.

    A fellow who was very uptight
    Met a woman one steamy night
    She took him to bed
    With a shrug of her head
    And both had quite a night of delight.

  17. Pat Hatt says:

    A gal who was very uptight,
    Decided to let loose one night.
    She shook her bum,
    After drinking some rum,
    Bringing the full moon in sight

  18. Mark Kane says:

    Let me try that last one again:

    A gal who was often uptight,
    Developed a strange appetite.
    For werewolves and vampires,
    And all that inspires,
    She now lives each night, bite to bite.

  19. Johanna Richmond says:

    A man who was very uptight
    About grammar — it HAD to be right —
    Had a much harder time
    With his meter and rhyme
    And his images veered toward the trite.  

    He dreamed he might find, still available, 
    A woman with skills unassailable;
    Twixt usage so noble
    And wit, they’d go global…
    At least Mount Mad Kane might be scalable!

  20. scott says:

    A gal who was very uptight,
    woke me at dawns early light,
    knowing I’d feel like hell,
    too much Zinfandel,
    she said “it serves your ass right.”

  21. For her:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Took to sleepwalking, night after night.
    Till she met a gas pipe,
    Who she knew was her type,
    He blew up and she’s tight; that’s alright.

    For him:
    A man who was very uptight
    Concerning one conjugal right,
    Cupid, not Plato,
    Stalk, not potato,
    Never a word about blight!

  22. Matt Monitto says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Cried, “We must stay away from the Right!”
    But she wasn’t astute
    When it came to pursuit:
    She wed Newt. (Yeah, she wasn’t too bright.)

  23. Jesse Levy says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    knew something just wasn’t right
    Seems she prefered gals
    as more than just pals
    She has no more lesbian fright.

  24. Johanna Richmond says:

    Santorum, who’s very uptight
    But, regrettably, not very bright
    Views the white house as palace
    Where he’ll smite, hand on phallus,
    Nonbelievers who question his might.

  25. Johanna Richmond says:

    Here’s the corrected version of my earlier limerick.

    A guy who is very uptight
    Seems to think all the voters are white.
    Is it Mitt, Newt or Rick?
    I don’t know – take your pick;
    It’s a fantasy shared on the right.

  26. brian miller says:

    a gal that was rather uptight
    and sadly was not very bright
    got in a wreck
    screamed what the heck
    and was sent to the pokey for the night

  27. Johanna Richmond says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Did ninety-nine Kegels each night.
    Her beau shared, “Neurotic
    Can be quite erotic —
    Give me stress over sweetness and light!”

  28. Robert Schechter says:

    A gal who was often uptight
    Told her boyfriend, “Sex isn’t polite.
    It’s dirty,” she sighed.
    To which he replied,
    “It is if you’re doing it right”

    (old Woody Allen joke, I think)

  29. Dr. Goose says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Might resist one’s advances all night,
    But after some liquor,
    She acquiesced quicker,
    As rum made it seem quite alright.

  30. Jim Delaney says:

    A gal was extremely uptight
    On account of she wasn’t too bright,
    While her specs made each mellow gent
    Think her intelligent,
    Assuming a mind out of sight.

  31. Ira Bloom says:

    A gal who was very uptight,
    Met a gentleman who was polite.
    “Would you bend over, please,
    With your pants ’round your knees?”
    He implored, which she deemed erudite.

  32. Ira Bloom says:

    A guy who was very uptight,
    Found himself in a terrible plight,
    When a persistent lass,
    Shoved her (No! It’s too crass!)
    Which turned out to be his kryptonite.

  33. John Larkin says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    was ashamed of her body’s height.
    But when she tried basketball
    where it pays to be tall,
    she couldn’t contain her delight.

  34. ANNE VOLK says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Told her boyfriend to go fly a kite
    His feelings were shattered
    He thought that he mattered!
    For him she did not have “die Uhrzeit”

  35. Mike Rosson says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    had big trouble sleeping at night
    She’d fret all night long
    that to worry was wrong-
    and the irony is, she was right.

  36. zongrik says:

    one city that wasn’t uptight
    had strippers just dancing all night
    one danced with a pole
    revealing her mole
    ’cause her g-string was on way too tight.

    stripper limerick

  37. viv blake says:

    A lass who was always uptight
    refused to make love in the light.
    She said “you will see me
    and then you will flee me.
    I really do look such a fright.”

  38. Madeleine, you have such an amazing devotion to your craft, which shows in everly limerick.

    I’m not really a prolific writer in that vein – but I’ve linked to what I consider my best, “Flying to Nantucket”.

  39. Irv Dean says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    kept a little gun near her at night
    for she worried some guy
    might sneak in and espy
    the secret she’d kept out of sight

  40. A gal who was very uptight
    wasn’t too overly bright
    she once lit a fire
    beneath an admirer
    successfully dousing his light .

    I thought I’d try. Hope that works for you :)

  41. A man who was very uptight
    took a walk on the wild side one night.
    After crashing his car
    he lurched into the bar …
    loosened up by the end of the night.

  42. Robert Schechter says:

    An astronaut, always uptight,
    Was filled with unspeakable fright
    When told, “You’re the one
    We will launch to the Sun!”
    He gulped, “Can I go there at night?”

  43. A girl who was very uptight
    gave her boyfriend a hell of a fright.
    She lay there so rigid,
    he thought, ‘Is she frigid —
    or perhaps she has died in the night?’

  44. Robert Schechter says:

    A poet named Frost was uptight.
    A fork in the road was his plight.
    “If I choose to go left
    It might leave me bereft.
    But then again, left may be right.”

  45. Edmund Conti says:

    A man who was very uptight
    In traffic passed cars where he might.
    Here’s a lesson for him
    So his fate won’t be grim:
    Right is wrong, Sir (and wait), left is right.

  46. Poetesswug says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    had a twitch and was ready to fight.
    If you said the wrong word
    and ‘Her Uptightness’ heard,
    you’d be in for a very long night!

  47. Edmund Conti says:

    A Brit who was very uptight
    Found the islands laid back, a delight
    On the Island of Man
    You may do what you can.
    But, wait a sec, that isn’t Wight!

  48. Edmund Conti says:

    Said a man who was very uptight
    In his attitude re kryptonite:
    It can sap all my strength
    And reduces the length
    Of the source of my sexual might.

  49. Robert Schechter says:

    A fellow who dies is uptight
    To end up in a tunnel of light
    Where dead folks appear
    And cry, “Billy, draw near.”
    He answers, “You fuck-ups, I’m Dwight!”

  50. Johanna Richmond says:

    A woman’s thought very uptight
    When she says to the rescuing knight,
    “Don’t seek my devotion
    You’ve had a demotion
    To little man looking for height.”

  51. Robert Schechter says:

    Ben Franklin no doubt was uptight
    As he stood in a rainstorm one night
    In the horribly frightening
    Thunder and lightening
    As his girlfriend cried, “Go fly a kite!”

  52. Edmund Conti says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Was made sad by the suffering and plight
    Of lost kitties and puppies
    And out-of-work yuppies,
    Newt Gingrich, Tim Tebow, the Right.

  53. Edmund Conti says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    By the fact of her small widow’s mite.
    Decided she’d go
    Off to work like a pro
    Which she did on the streets every night.

  54. What a hoot. How do you THINK of all these limericks? Rosemary, yours takes the prize! Hilarious!

  55. Robert Schechter says:

    A fisherman, rather uptight,
    Was dejected when no fish would bite,
    But he staved off the blues
    By re-spinning the news,
    Saying, “Children, it’s pizza tonight!”

  56. Edmund Conti says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    By the fact of her new widowed plight
    Sold her body for pay
    Because as they say
    If divorcees may, I’m sure widow’s might.

  57. Johanna Richmond says:

    Jan Bewer is very uptight
    When encountering men not so white
    So she always comes armed
    (Lest her virtue be harmed)
    With a rude, finger pointing sound BITE.

  58. Mama Zen says:

    This sounds like half of the women in my family!

  59. Robert Schechter says:

    A guy who was shy and uptight
    Asked his girl, “Was I doing it right?”
    “I didn’t much care for
    The part I was there for,”
    She said. “When I left, though, you might.”

  60. Humor blog! That’s such a great idea, humor is so good for us. I like your uptight Limerick! :)

  61. Bodhirose says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Made sure everyone knew of her plight
    She carried-on and grumbled
    Nit-picked and rumbled
    Tightly winding herself up each night

    Hi Madeleine… :)

  62. A young princess who was being beautiful but also was being very uptight
    Was as it was seeming to her to be awake for all of the hours of the night
    What I am telling you is that the things was keeping her expression wide-eyed
    Was an arachnid of genus blackly and hursutely endowed that she had spied
    In a web that was being both beautiful and also being on her bedroom light.

    Is this not being a think of beauty?

  63. Edmund Conti says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    About each imagined small slight
    Felt rather put out
    When her son (what a lout!)
    Got married and sent no invite.

  64. Edmund Conti says:

    Said a gal who was very uptight
    About a perceived oversight:
    I feel this omission
    In nuclear fission
    Will blow up the world. Amiright?

  65. Stephen Earp says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Decided his God given right
    Was violence and terror
    But thanks to an error
    The bomb he made failed to ignite

  66. Robert Schechter says:

    A man who was super uptight
    Put on his galoshes each night.
    The streets were bone dry,
    But he said, “This way I
    Am protected should I step in shite.”

    A man who was super uptight
    Wondered, “Who said that a bite
    Isn’t worse than a bark?
    What a stupid remark!
    Any fool can perceive it’s not right!”

  67. Daniel Ari says:

    A Scotsman was very uptight.
    He complained, “Och! My belly’s not right.
    After eating that steak
    and half a cheesecake
    I find I just can’t give a shite.”

  68. Daniel Ari says:

    Santorum is way too uptight.
    To him, gay commitments are blight.
    Marriage equality
    Does not fit Rick’s polity.
    He won’t pass it; however, Mitt might.

  69. Daniel Ari says:

    A man who was very uptight
    about his pronounced overbite
    threatened, “Stare at my chin,
    and I’ll knock your chin in
    with a left and a left and a right.”

  70. Daniel Ari says:

    A man who was very uptight
    went spelunking without enough light.
    He emerged from the breech,
    and in falsetto speech
    gasped, “I found waist-high stalagmite.”

  71. Nan Reiner (a/k/a Kitty Ditty) says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Crafted lim’ricks from morning ‘til night,
    But she knew not from rhyme,
    Nor from meter or time,
    So, in each verse, two wrongs made a write.

  72. Nan Reiner (a/k/a Kitty Ditty) says:

    A man who is very uptight
    Finds he just can’t say anything right.
    When he tries for “just folks,”
    All that comes out are croaks
    Like “The trees here are just the right height.”

  73. Nan Reiner (a/k/a Kitty Ditty) says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Found her Chinaman mate no delight,
    But she relished the sin
    When his brother joined in,
    Shrieking gaily, “Two Wongs make it right!”

  74. too tired to write a limerick…but i love the city…smiles

  75. Shawna says:

    I tried, but I’ve got nothin’. :)

  76. A gal who was very uptight
    woke up every dawn before light.
    She burned up her bagels
    and screwed up her Kegels;
    that’s why she was never quite right!

  77. Daniel Ari says:

    A guy who was very uptight
    attended a gala one night.
    In the hullaballoo
    two gals hollered, “Woo-hoo!
    Isn’t this fun?” He said, “Quite.”

  78. Daniel Ari says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    and a big fan of all things Twilight
    declared Hunger Games
    “the lamest of lames—
    the protagonists don’t have much bite.”

  79. Geraldine says:

    I’m not good at these but I loved yours Madelaine. Brought a smile to my morning.

    Sending lots of hugs, G :<)

  80. A man who was very uptight
    Had troubles with sleeping at night.
    So he mixed up a drink
    And as quick as a wink…
    “Hey, use vodka, not coffee!” “Oh, right.”

  81. Granny Smith says:

    A pol who was very uptight,
    Santorum, extremists delight,
    When a brave aide did note
    That women could vote
    He argued, “I’m sure that’s not right!

  82. A gal who was very uptight
    Stayed with her fella overnight.
    In her fall from grace
    She dropped to his face,
    And she sure didn’t get stage fright!

  83. tashtoo says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Found shadows would chase her at night
    Try as she may
    She could not keep fear at bay
    and she ended up dying of fright

  84. A man who is very uptight
    Sees all but himself as a blight.
    Santorum’s his name
    And is claim to fame
    Are sweater vests…Oh! What a fright!

  85. A man who is very uptight
    Sees all but himself as a blight.
    Santorum’s his name
    And his claim to fame
    Are sweater vests…Oh! What a fright!

    *Had to correct the typo in my previous post!*

  86. Sara McNulty says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Waxed her floors each day at midnight
    Creeping dow for a snack
    Her spouse broke his back
    She said, “You should use a flashlight.”

    ——————————-

    A guy was very uptight
    Complained in mid-air on a fight
    The picture’s not clear
    on my screen, I fear
    Did the voting go left or right?

  87. Edmund Conti says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    About the so-called speed of light
    Wondered, “If I went faster,
    Would it be a disaster
    Or what men would call feminine spite?”

  88. Turquoise says:

    A man who was very uptight
    blew his nose under candlelight.
    Roast duck for dinner
    did nothing to win her
    against hankie brandished all night.

    Strands Of Turquoise

  89. Edmund Conti says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Wrote limericks he thought were just right
    Till Madaleine Kane
    Felt compelled to explain,
    “Ed, they rhyme and they scan. But they’re trite!”

  90. Edmund Conti says:

    Kids, get a gold star!. Learn to spell Madeleine

  91. Bone says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Let his inhibitions go one night
    And according to those
    Who were there, I proposed
    To every poor damsel in sight

  92. Nan Reiner (a/k/a Kitty Ditty) says:

    A Brooklynite, very uptight,
    Grew distressingly frightened at night.
    As the sun set each day,
    He would sigh, with dismay,
    “Woe is me. Dat’s de end of delight.”

  93. Nan Reiner (a/k/a Kitty Ditty) says:

    A teacher who’s very uptight
    Warned her class, as they set out to write,
    “You’ll see grade diminution
    For non-attribution,
    But you may find love at first cite.”

  94. Robert Schechter says:

    A guy who was tense and uptight
    ‘Cause his rhymes were not coming out right
    In the limerick he wrote
    To win Madeleine’s vote
    Thought that this one would do it. Not quite.

  95. A musician who was quite uptight
    Did refuse to come into the light
    For he knew it was wrong
    What he wrote in his song
    But in darkness he’d always delight

  96. Johanna Richmond says:

    It pays to be very uptight
    (Part and parcel of being quite bright)
    If you’re Woody, a titan
    Of wise men who frighten
    At the prospect of joy and delight.

  97. Turquoise says:

    A man who was very uptight,
    afraid he was losing his sight,
    called the police,
    jabbering medicalese —
    but his wife said, “Just turn on the light!”

  98. Johanna Richmond says:

    My dear dachshund is very uptight;
    Underneath me his ball is wedged tight,
    And though sitting’s no joy
    With a crack full of toy
    Just to teach him, I’ll sit here all night.

  99. Johanna Richmond says:

    Since “uptight” and “tight” make questionable rhyming words, I’ve written this alternative:

    My dear dachshund is very uptight;
    ‘Tween my butt and his ball there’s no light,
    And though sitting’s no joy
    With a crack full of toy
    Just to teach him, I’ll sit here all night.

  100. Sara McNulty says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Would never be seen in daylight
    Unless fully made up
    She’d not pull the shade up
    For fear she’d five someone a fright.

    ———————————————
    A man who was very uptight
    Could not leave home, try as he night
    He’d check burners three time
    Check the height of all blinds
    By the time he was done it was night.

  101. Turquoise says:

    A man who was very uptight

    feared soap bars with all of his might.

    Those germs, they could slither

    up fingers and thither —

    guerrilla warfare clean out of his sight.

  102. Rich D says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Succumbed on a cross-country flight
    Above the Big Sky
    She joined the Mile High
    And now thinks First Class is alright!

  103. Rich D says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Locked out of his condo one night
    He had no house key
    And a mean urge to pee
    And no bushes to answer his plight

  104. Rich D says:

    *** CHANGE TO PREVIOUS POSTING ***

    A man who was very uptight
    Locked out of his condo one night
    He had no house key
    And a mean urge to pee
    But no shrubbery to answer his plight

  105. Rich D says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Met a young lady one night
    She suggested “Nantucket”
    But he went and “mistuck it”
    For a boit where they could get a bite.

  106. Rich D says:

    A guitarist who was quite uptight
    Was playing with friends late one night
    When they got to the jam
    He just couldn’t ham.
    The spotlight, it didn’t feel right.

  107. Rich D says:

    A man who was very uptight
    was watching old Disneys one night
    He took to the words
    About feeding the birds
    And went out and flew him a kite!

  108. Rich D says:

    A man who was called quite uptight
    Resisted his urges with might
    But when his pants
    Projected a lance
    He showed it to all just for spite

  109. Rich D says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Ordered some Kung Pao one night
    The kit and kaboodles
    Turned out to be noodles
    She ate it and put up no fight

  110. Rich D says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Was hardly a drool-worthy sight
    The gap in her teef
    Was a spinach leaf
    And gave all her dates such a fright

  111. Rich D says:

    A gal was thought quite uptight
    Turned on when she turned off the light
    The noise when she came
    Was almost the same
    As wolves at the moon in the night

  112. ‘Chele Bachmann is very uptight
    Views masturbation unholy sight.
    Stays out of backseats,
    Keeps hands above sheets,
    But pokes fun at herself at night!

  113. Michelle Hed says:

    A man who was very uptight,
    was up pacing throughout the night.
    The cock-a-doodle-doo
    had him throwing his shoe,
    where he slipped on the dew, nighty-night!

  114. Michelle Hed says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    was upset with her lack of height.
    She tried hanging from bars,
    being pulled by two cars
    but all she grew was a short sound bite.

  115. Craig says:

    A gal who, with boys, was uptight
    Met a girl who would help her ignite.
    With ways cunnilinguistic
    She soon went ballistic –
    Now she has two or three every night!

  116. Nan Reiner (a/k/a Kitty Ditty) says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Stole a rickety sailboat last night.
    He cruised into the bay,
    But came back straightaway,
    Liking neither the barque nor the bight.

    [That’s the last groaner from me, I think. I’m all punned out for the week. ;-) ]

  117. Rich D says:

    A man who was rather uptight
    for the size of his member was slight
    and so with the girls
    he just dove for pearls
    lickety-split and with all of his might

  118. Rich D says:

    A comic who as quite uptight
    froze up from a case of stage fright
    His only report
    from a bit that was short
    was “Try the veal, thank you, good night”

  119. Rich D says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Was told that he just wasn’t right
    Well, maybe the sex
    with his Rotweiler Rex
    was sick but the doggy don’t bite

  120. Mark Kane says:

    A cop who was not so uptight,
    Quickly handcuffed the rogue, barring flight.
    First she parted his cheeks,
    Then she stole a few peeks,
    While carefully frisking just right.

  121. Gordon Moore says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Ran for President from the far right.
    His name was Santorum
    But he got no quorum
    And we can sleep soundly at night.

  122. Granny Smith says:

    A dog who was very uptight
    Felt an urge to go out in the night
    With business to do
    (Deposit his poo)
    And to chase any burglar and bite

  123. Rich D says:

    A man who was kind of uptight
    Kept saying “far out, out of sight”
    and then he’d remember
    he wasn’t John Denver
    cuz he never took off on that flight

  124. Rich D says:

    ok, so I stretched the “license” a bit there with remember and Denver, but…

  125. Johanna Richmond says:

    Many teens are morose and uptight
    Knowing mothers have keen second sight.
    Naughty plans are like pee
    That most people can’t see
    But good moms possess ultra-V light.

  126. Diane Groothuis says:

    A gal who was very uptight
    Went out on the town for a night
    Although she was stressed
    She was very well dressed
    And nobody knew of her plight

  127. Diane Groothuis says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Looked all round the town for a fight.
    He’d kick and he’d punch
    And bring up his lunch
    Saying “That was a helluva night”.

  128. Edmund Conti says:

    A man who was very uptight
    Awoke with a start one cold night.
    Distraught by the specter
    Of Robert Q. Schechter
    Frisking his limericks for spite.

  129. Rich D says:

    A man who was rather uptight
    Would only go fishing at night
    Because all those boors
    And their fancy damn lures
    Would razz him if nothing would bite.

  130. Rich D says:

    A gal who was rather uptight
    Refused to go travelling by flight
    Because of the day
    When the damned TSA
    Decided to frisk her on site.

  131. madkane says:

    And the winner is…

    Congratulations to this week’s Limerick of the Week Winner, the Facebook Friends’ Choice Award Winner, and the Honorable Mention Winners! Limerick of the Week 55

    But you can still have fun with limericks. How? A new Limerick-Off has already begun: Show-Off Limerick