Argumentative Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus three Honorable Mentions.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here are two excellent resources: OEDILF on Writing A Limerick and Speedy Snail’s Limerick Rhythm and Meter.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A woman who loved a good fight…

or

A fellow who loved a good fight…

Here’s mine:

Argumentative Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A woman who loved a good fight
Would argue from morning till night.
She did it for sport
And she did it in court
Where her favorite word was “indict.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!

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84 Responses to “Argumentative Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. Matty says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    drank liquor well into the night
    as he came thru the door
    at a quarter past four
    his wife knocked an inch off his height.

  2. Rinkly Rimes says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Was, also, not terribly bright.
    When he got in the ring
    He would dance or he’d sing
    And then be knocked out like a light!

  3. Stan Ski says:

    So this is the right room for an argument… :)

  4. trisha says:

    just loved it. i wish i had your sense of humour and expertise of writing a limerick.

  5. David says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    reacted to every slight slight.
    She’d punch in the eye
    anyone who came by
    with a look that she thought was not right.

  6. vivienne blake says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    beat her husband every night.
    He did’t mind –
    the masochist kind –
    and he thought that she had every right.

  7. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Blight Lite?

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Took delight in the trite “Might is Right!”
    A perpetual winner,
    Sneered when labeled a sinner;
    Despite his great height, no white knight

    Of the realm. Then one day, into town
    Strode a stranger, impressive, no clown;
    Armor bright, dark as night.
    Bully Dwight felt no fright
    And lunged forth with one thought: Smite him down!

    Swords arose, met and clashed – timeless rite:
    Townsfolk cheered at Dwight’s plight, served him right
    As the stranger prevailed,
    Was by one and all hailed.
    Since then, Dwight sports a slight overbite.

  8. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Faced boxing opponents each night,
    But wasn’t delighted
    With who was invited
    So threatened to bite, just for spite.

  9. Pearl Ketover Prilik says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Was saddened to learn that she might
    Have to hang up each glove
    And give over to love
    Her passion redirected at night 

  10. A man who loved a good fight
    Was out there prowling the night
    Looking to spar
    His passion was far
    From his limp side of their bed on the right
     

  11. Lee Magilow says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Went to the arena one night
    In the midst of the bout
    A hockey match broke out
    That’s where that old punch line took flight.

  12. madkane says:

    Thanks for your fun limericks everyone. Please keep them coming and, if you’re active on Facebook, cross-post them on Facebook too.

    By the way, you don’t have to be one of my Facebook friends to post your limerick at that above link. But if you want to friend me there, just send me your request.

    Thanks again!

  13. jesse levy says:

    A woman who loved a good fight,
    use to do it with all of her might.
    But her husband objected
    So they got disconnected
    She’s alone now and it serves her right.

  14. George Solomon says:

    A fellow who loved a Good Fight,
    Would Bicker all day and all night,
    A Bully was He,
    To all that He’d See,
    We Loved when he bade Us “Good Night.”

  15. Ron Mardix says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Liked to argue with guys twice his height
    He stepped into a bar
    Went a little too far
    And woke up the following night

  16. A woman who loved a good fight
    It happened every time she got tight,
    Her husband said no when she wanted a drink.
    Which in turn caused a big stink.
    In the end she was high as a kite.

  17. Versebender says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Said, “Darlin’, you know it’s all right
    The reason I’m itchin’
    To get in some bitchin’:
    The making up part’s a delight!”

  18. Teri C says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    And always fought with such spite
    When all along
    He was wrong
    I was the one that was right

  19. Marie York says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    egged him on with a taunt a bit trite…
    “your cheeks are just dimply,
    all deep pink which simply
    puts me in fit of delight!”

    He drew back in horror at thoughts
    that she effected his fists into knots
    and realized she threw
    some sort of witch-brew
    to befuddle his thinking alots..

    His heart started faster to beat,
    when he shuddered and fell at her feet
    As subdued as he felt,
    while before her he knelt
    he realized true love in defeat!

  20. Jingle says:

    perfect!

    you know women well, beautiful humor.

    A++

  21. Granny Smith says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Went to Tea Party meetings each night.
    She made it a point
    To demolish the joint
    As her own individual right.

  22. Gloria says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Had a bark that was worse than her bite
    But don’t give her beer
    Or a cup of good cheer
    Because she might bite you when tight!

  23. Granny Smith says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Invited to dinner one night
    A catholic, a Jew,
    Palestinians too.
    They kissed and made up out of spite!

  24. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Granny, I love this set, especially first and third! Must be my inner Democrat coming out (well, already out, actually) ~ thus I cheer your sentiments on :)

  25. madkane says:

    We’re off to a wonderful start. Thanks, and please keep your limericks coming!

  26. Daisy Mae says:

    A man who loved a good fight
    Had a temper he loved to ignite
    Not the Tyson of chicken
    This Mike gave harsh lickin’s
    Ask Evander, whose ear he did bite!

  27. Bodhirose says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Married a man with strong spite
    So they hurt and annoyed
    And irritated and exploited
    Each other all day and all night.

  28. Hahahaha. Love the theme. No time to write one right now though. :)

  29. earlybird says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    was honestly not a nice sight;
    his nose had been shattered,
    his brains somewhat battered
    and his bark was much worse than his bite.

  30. Tilly Bud says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Found himself in a bit of a plight
    The lady he wed
    Had a terrible dread
    Of affray, and of him took fright.

    There are some really funny ones today :)

  31. jinksy says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight,
    was often an unpleasant sight.
    Though nobody chooses
    getting covered in bruises,
    this often turned into his plight.

  32. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    G.U.I., or Grousing While Soused

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Debated, elated, each night:
    He spewed and he yammered
    Each point home he hammered,
    ‘Til even plump pigeons took flight

    From streets where he always held court,
    Snorts following ev’ry retort…
    With each misdemeanor,
    Demeanor de meaner,
    Bystanders declared, “It’s de port!”

  33. fiveloaf says:

    i know where to go when i needed a chuckle.. my potluck.. Chinese Love Story

  34. hansi says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Started a Party on the extreme right
    For a big hefty fee
    She’d talk about all things Tea
    And utter nonsense, much to everybody’s delight.

  35. Nicole says:

    I am glad this lady was in the appropriated profession! Great word-play as always.

  36. A woman who loved a good fight
    Rolled in the gutter one night
    Pulling the hair
    Of London’s proud mayor
    She’s sent to The Tower – serves her right!

  37. lolamouse says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Ran her car right on through a red light
    When she stopped for the cop
    She gave him a pop
    And now she’s in jail for the night!

  38. Mama Zen says:

    I love this one!

  39. scott says:

    A woman who loved a good fight,
    stood boldly against England’s might.
    A revolt she would spark,
    young Sainte-Jeanne-d’Arc,
    but the stake her bold spark would ignite.

  40. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Scott, I like this last one a lot! :)
    {umm, inadvertent rhyme there – I must be “in the zone” :) }

  41. scott says:

    Thanks Patrice! What a coincidence to get a comment from you because as I type this, my cat is in the corner having kittens. So far two are out and nursing, a gray one and a yellow one. I am trying to leave her alone so as not to stress her out but I can’t help looking in on her. I’m sure there will be more and I will be Scott of the ManyCats.

    Anyone want a kitten in six-weeks?

  42. scott says:

    A woman who loved a good fight,
    threw down with her spouse every night.
    She would start toe-to-toe,
    then end with a blow,
    that made her man squeal with delight.

  43. Patrick says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Thought opponents were thoroughly trite.
    When she was tested,
    she’s never was bested,
    even though they were given to bite.

  44. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Scott, thanks for replying ~ yes, what a coincidence! Unfortunately our “inn is full” with our five current cats, down from eight last year before illnesses struck :(
    I would be the proverbial Cat Lady without my husband’s moderating voice of reason; the saying “One can never have too many cats” originated from someone like me…so I wish you the very best with finding good home(s) for the kits, perhaps even with someone posting on Mad’s page here :)

    Mad, thanks for allowing us to diverge momentarily from the Limericks Path! :)

  45. madkane says:

    Thanks everyone for your kind words and fun limericks. Please keep your limericks coming. You have a whole week to post before I award our next Limerick of the Week winner on Sunday.

  46. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    {I’ve experimented here with changing meter midstream, starting with “Mr. MephisTOPHeles”, and welcome any and all feedback on cadence, ease of reading, etc. :) }

    Enemy = Ene-Me

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Took on inner demons each night.
    They’d roll, tumble, wrestle,
    His body the vessel ~
    A bone-chilling, hair-raising sight.

    He’d chortle and shout out with glee,
    “You’ll not get the better of me!
    Mr. Mephistopheles,
    You can’t do just as you please!
    I’ll win soon, then everyone will see…”

    In his mind the horde attacked, obscene;
    He leapt to intercept, his knife edge keen…
    Came the dawn, not a peep
    Where he lay fast asleep,
    Clutching his own throat, his face serene.

  47. madkane says:

    Patrice, you’ve pinpointed the spot where your limerick goes astray. The Mephistopheles line not only has a meter problem, it also has a rhyme problem. You’re trying to rhyme tease (a stressed syllable) with the unstressed last syllable of Mephistophelese, and that doesn’t work. You need to rhyme the last three syllables of Mephistophelese, starting with TOPHelese, which may well be impossible. I’d suggest this rewrite of the last three lines of verse two to cure your meter and rhyme issue:

    Mephistopheles, freeze!
    Your power I’ll seize.
    I’ll win soon and people will see.

    You also have some meter issues in the last verse in the three A-rhyme lines. If you read it aloud, I think you’ll hear some extra beats and odd stresses in those three lines.

  48. a fellow who loved a good fight
    would go on a rumble all night
    he’d punch and he’d jeer
    fuelled on gallons of beer
    then strut off to bed at first light

  49. Victoria says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    would lie awake all through the night
    “What bait should I use
    and who to abuse?”
    were the thoughts that sprung up from her spite.

  50. Dr. Goose says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Would demand, as she argued all night,
    Philosophical heft
    From those on the left
    And empirical proof from the right.

  51. Granny Smith says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Looked strange in the eve’s dimming light.
    She stoutly denied
    She was transmogrified
    But howled to the moon in the night.

  52. Veralynne Pepper says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Kept her mate awake most of the night
    He thought make-up sex cool
    So he followed the rule
    But he thought, “Somehow this just ain’t right.

    “We get along well through the day
    We cook together, we eat and we play
    But night comes along
    And she sings a new song
    I don’t like it, but what can I say?”

    He liked the results, yes it’s true
    So he didn’t know what else he could do
    It was worth the battle
    And listening to her prattle
    For make-up love when the fighting was through.

  53. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Thanks very much for your analysis, Mad! :)
    Redone version:

    Enemy = Ene-Me

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Took on inner demons each night.
    They’d roll, tumble, wrestle,
    His body the vessel ~
    A bone-chilling, hair-raising sight.

    He’d chortle and shout out with glee,
    “You’ll not get the better of me!
    Mephistopheles, please:
    You’re just a big tease!
    I’ll win soon, and then I’ll be free…”

    He leapt, intercepted the horde,
    Sharp blade sweeping down as they roared…
    Came the dawn, not a peep
    As he smiled, deep in sleep ~
    Grasp firm on invisible sword.

  54. madkane says:

    Patrice, you’re very welcome. Your new version is vastly improved!

    And thanks everyone for your fun limericks! Please keep them coming. I don’t pick Limerick of the Week until Sunday, so you have lots of time to get your Limerick-Off submissions in. :)

  55. A woman who loved a good fight,
    To Tom was a wondrous delight.
    Rough fellow was he,
    To their surprise and great glee,
    They fought the double backed monster all night.

  56. Daisy Mae says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Who dumped Marc Zuckenberg one night
    Was the true inspiration
    For Facebook’s creation
    Her name? Erica Albright

  57. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    United We Stand – A Chance

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Breathed deeply, researched Left and Right ~
    Exhausted, felt baited,
    Confused, sad, frustrated:
    Obama, while great, no White Knight

    Who’ll cure all our problems by (date).
    Folks, please! We can no longer wait
    For divine revelation
    Or Second Creation.
    There’s hope, we have no destined fate:

    Can always choose love over hate ~
    Sounds hard? Yet forgiveness feels great!
    Our nation has choices;
    Let each of our voices
    Unite in our goals: it grows late…

  58. Steve Nance says:

    A woman who loved a good fight —
    Not for spite — but outrage at the Right —
    Said, “What you call ‘realistic’
    Is just solipsistic —
    An excuse to ignore others’ plight.”

  59. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Right on, Steve!
    Hmmm: “Left on” just doesn’t mean the same thing, darn it…

  60. Steve Nance says:

    Thanks, Patrice. Your triple limerick was inspired/inspiring as well.

  61. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Thank you, Steve; and with another bow to you, here’s one:

    Let’s not Rush to judgment in haste
    Nor offer Pat answers, a waste;
    The guv of Alaska
    Has failed at her task ~ a
    “Solution” with which we’re all faced.

  62. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    It’s counterintuitive, strange
    To arrange for no way of exchange:
    We all are endan-
    Gered by our fear of change,
    Thus too often we limit our range :^(

  63. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Mad, my apologies for straying from this week’s first line in my eagerness to channel The Muse of Creativity before (s)he flitted off again ~ will comply henceforth! :^)

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Would oft Rush to judgment. Despite
    Sly denial of facts,
    Endless unholy pacts,
    They applaud him ~ the Limb of the Right.

  64. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Spared no one her trite sense of Right:
    The guv of Alaska
    Has failed at her task ~ a
    “Solution” which highlights our plight.

  65. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Spews bile, all the while spreading blight;
    Always out on a Lim(b)-
    [Baugh]: Bah, humbug to him!
    Spurns the facts in attacks ~ is this Right?

  66. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight,
    Wings bright, urged us on: “Cease your blight…”
    Gently scolded, “Dear human,
    You’re consumed with consumin’ ~
    It sounds trite, but you’ll soon see the Light!”

    Some listened, but many steered wide
    Of truth for which others had died.
    You can hide, I can run,
    We can wallow in “fun”…
    No escaping the knowledge inside.

  67. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Vents his spleen, plain mean, filled with spite;
    Vitriolic, bombastic,
    He urges the drastic ~
    In terrible things takes delight… :<(

  68. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Took on the machine of the Right:
    Sure, say what you will
    Of our Hil and her Bill;
    It took skill to ignite Left v. Spite.

  69. madkane says:

    Patrice, LOL! you’re really going strong today, aren’t you? I think you may have set or be close to setting some sort of record. :)

  70. Granny Smith says:

    A woman who liked a good fight
    Donned the armor of crusading knight.
    She knew at a glance
    That she needed a lance…
    Now YOU write the punch line. Right!

  71. Dr. Goose says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Was prone to attack from the Right,
    But once in a while,
    She’d scramble the dial,
    And attack from the Left, just for spite.

  72. madkane says:

    I’m really enjoying these. Thanks and please keep them coming. Just two more days before I pick Limerick of the Week this Sunday. Thanks!

  73. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    I guess that’s a good thing, Mad! My muse was on the loose, how could I refuse?! :^D

  74. madkane says:

    Patrice, I always say the more the merrier. :)

  75. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Saw the world strictly in black and white ~
    But he found out one day
    There exist shades of grey;
    Now he questions all things, great or slight.

  76. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Disagreed with all persons in sight;
    Then implored, “Now I’m bored!
    Please return to be gored ~
    Each of you must acknowledge I’m right!”

  77. Granny Smith says:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Fought for justice and peace every night,
    Not with fists but instead
    With words to be read
    On the Web. That’s where Write is Might.

  78. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Wonderful, Granny! :) And bouncing off your theme:

    A woman who loved a good fight
    Wrestled lim’ricks by night ~ quite a sight:
    Strata formed amidst data;
    Dawn inspection by cat…a
    Fresh archeological site.

  79. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Writes lim’ricks in strong morning light.
    Metered stress he would grapple
    {On a PC (not Apple)},
    One syllable left: that’s not right! :^[

  80. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A fellow who loved a good fight
    Took delight in the trite and true Right:
    “Only unaware fools,
    Used, confused, serve as tools,”
    He incited: no insight in sight.

  81. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A nation who loved a good fight
    Was bewildered: turn Left or go Right?
    Petty party directive
    Oft abject, non reflective,
    Just recites PoliLite ~ not too bright…

  82. madkane says:

    Who won Limerick of the Week for last week’s Limerick-Off? Who got the four Honorable Mentions? You can find out here: Limerick of the Week 7.

    Thanks again everyone for your delightful limericks. A new Limerick-Off has already begun. You can find it here: Spurned Limerick