Spurned Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus four Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here are two excellent resources: OEDILF on Writing A Limerick and Speedy Snail’s Limerick Rhythm and Meter.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A gal had to cancel her plan…
or
A man had to cancel his plan…
Here’s mine. (It’s a two-verse limerick, but a standard one-verser will be fine, of course.)
Spurned Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal had to cancel her plan
To marry a very cute man.
He spurned her advances,
Ignored all her glances —
‘Twas over before it began.
She was angry and wanted him dead —
Dreamt of murder while lying in bed.
Now at last he’s been killed
And those thoughts have been stilled,
For that fellow was all in her head.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Crime, Marriage Limerick, Mental Health, Obsession Verse, Poetry & Prompts, Relationship Poetry, Romance Poem, Writing Prompts
A chap had to cancel his plan
to rob a bank, as it didn’t scan.
From limerick form
it was outside the norm
so instead, he murdered his gran.
A gal had to cancel her plan
To marry a rich guy named Stan
She had jumped in the sack
With Bartender Jack
Who knocked her up in his sedan
Your ‘Spurned Limerick’ is very good indeed, Mad; it plumbs depths beyond the level of an ordinary limerick (if there is such a thing as an ‘ordinary limerick’?).
Someone, who should know, told me once that a limerick should always be a bit naughty. Did you know that Icon of science fiction, Isaac Asimov, wrote a number of limerick collections toward the end of life, apparently, and quite naughty too!
A gal had to cancel her plan
Cause she couldn’t stand her present man
He looked like her Ex
And as for the sex
Instead of cumming, she ran
A gal had to cancel her plan
to operate on a sick man.
After the first incision
she made a new decision.
Of insurance the guy wasn’t a fan.
A gal had to cancel her plan
To purchase some art by Rodin
It turned out some stinkers
Made counterfeit Thinkers
Which they sold from the back of a van
A gal had to cancel her plan,
Her target got spooked and he ran.
Can’t leave him alive
And let down MI-5!
Jane Bond will always get her man!
A gal had to cancel her plan
To marry her fiancé, Stan
She’d had many a doubt
And then she found out
That Stanley was really Leeann.
A gal had to cancel her plan
To travel to far off Japan.
She was much to shy
To get ready to fly
By having a full body scan!
(I hope it was okay to post more than one.)
A guy had to cancel his plan
To work on his full body tan
‘Cause when he dropped trou
The bathers said “wow”
But cops hauled him off in a van
Yeah Mad, Cool bananas here’s mine:
A gal had to cancel her plan
To trap and to ensnare one man
She found that the blighter
Was fifty pounds lighter
And he was a she what a sham
Wow – I like the creepy twist in your second verse, Mad!
A gal had to cancel her plan
For sex with her musical man.
His hands were on fire
With lusty desire.
For her? Nope, his precious Chopin.
A gal had to cancel her plan
For gaining an all body tan
To avoid time in jail,
With no hope of bail,
In the land of the sunny Koran.
A gal had to cancel her plan
She went to our Capitol land
That’s when the Prez trumped “The Donald”
Who looked more like “The Ronald”
Every clown has his day–understand?
A gal had to cancel her plan
To enter the ball with elan
And to wear a red rose…
What’s red is her nose
And she ran when her pantyhose ran!
A pol had to cancel his plan
For the banner beneath which he ran,
Which read that “Obama
Cannot find Osama,”
When now it appears: Yes, he can.
Dr. Goose, congrats on posting such an apt, and timely limerick and thanks for your kind words about my second verse.
Poetjanstie, thanks. And re Asimov, I’ve heard about his limericks, but have never read them. I should probably try to hunt them down.
Gloria, more than one is fine, of course. The more the merrier!
Thanks everyone for your delightful limericks. Please keep them coming and cross-post them, if possible, on my Facebook post.
A man had to cancel his plan
To adopt a sole diet of bran;
Found he just couldn’t go,
His digestion too “slow”
Regardless of how much he ran.
A gal had to cancel her plan
To coax a commitment from Dan:
He was elsewhere engaged;
Learning this, Anne, enraged,
Switched abruptly to new target Stan.
A man had to cancel his plan
To take over the country. He ran
On a platform perverse:
Gave his speeches in verse,
Then receded ~ a flash in the pan.
A guy had to cancel his plan
to track down that terrorist man
but you can take it as read
that Osama is dead!
…it’s official and it’s in the can.
A man had to cancel his plan
To kill everyone that he can
‘Just hold your horses,’
Said Yank Special Forces
‘We’ll stop you there in Pakistan’
A gal had to cancel her plan
To surrender to love in a van;
It was rocking (how shocking)
So cops came a’knocking:
She blushed, caught with Stan, Ian, Dan…
But determined to couple that night,
Maybe triple! Three times the delight,
She followed her urgin’ ~
An encouragin’ virgin ~
In the back of Dan’s van, on the site
Of a building they thought was deserted.
Gates skirted, they laughed and they flirted…
In the grass lot, far back,
Commenced four-way attack
On each other, attention diverted.
As dawn broke, their passion was growing
And mutual juices a’flowing;
She shouted, “Boys, faster!”
Which prefaced disaster:
Knock, knock: “Ma’am, the grass, it needs mowing…”
A man had to cancel his plan
to take out the head of the Clan.
At the time he’d been pissed,
underrating the risk
of becoming a ‘wanted’ hit man.
Forgot to say, Mad, how much I enjoyed yours.
A gal had to cancel her plan
to study in depth the Koran
Osama now dead
was shot in the head
He’d said he now lived in Bhutan….
Can’t trust those Internet dating sites!
A man had to cancel his plan
For exploring Iran and Japan:
His grand tour in the can,
He updates through C-Span ~
Eating flan on his cyan divan.
A man had to cancel his plan
To interrogate heads of the Klan:
Misery in Missouri
Led to scurrying jury,
Yet Imperial Wizards aren’t Gran’…
A gal had to cancel her plan
To cavort on a new tan divan:
When she asked her man whether
He preferred suede or leather,
“Rugs are cool,” he enthused, “I’m a fan
Of spontaneous sex: flex your back
While I rest on your once-gorgeous rack;
You’ve gained weight, which I hate;
You no longer look great!”
He bemoaned, stepping up his attack.
She just smiled, in her head seeing red:
Did she wish that once-dear Fred were dead?
Then he felt her reaction ~
Ouch, those steps! (he’s in traction…)
Now a new guy named Ned shares her bed.
Her gal had to refuse a man
Why because he isn’t financially sound
Yet he came asking for his love
At last because he got rejected by Mr.Rich.
Plz do pass by my blogs page read,follow and comment to aid me improve my works too.
Thank you.Lovely day.
EBENEZER.
A gal had to cancel her plan
As the healthiest one in the land
Her colon exploded
Because it was loaded
With too many muffins of bran.
A gal had to cancel her plan,
of landing a well refined man.
She had few social graces,
loved all NASCAR races,
and drank her wine straight from the can.
A man had to cancel his plan,
to spread the word of the Koran.
Now Osama is dead,
shot right in the head,
somewhere in north Pakistan.
If you think there is no more to tell,
of the day when our defenses fell,
that he attacked from above,
with no help from our Gov.,
then I have a bridge here to sell.
Double-Cross Limerick
A gal had to cancel her plan
To marry an Indian man
The saris and gold
All had to be sold
To cover the cost of the sham
Since she chose to double-cross
The man had eloped with his boss
He now chose to hold
All her silver and gold
She wept seven years for her loss
a man had to cancel his plan
to marry his girl as he ran
right off to the races
of all stupid places
and that’s where his troubles began
A man had to cancel his plan
To picnic in ol’ Pakistan
His day turned to shit
When he knew he’d been hit
T’was the Seals who’d arrived in a van
I posted this one on my other blog (my Political Madness Blog):
Republicans had a great plan:
Make Barack seem an alien man.
So bin Laden’s demise
(A stunning surprise)
Turns their plot to a flash in the pan.
A man had to cancel his plan
To treat himself to a bit o’ the flan
Too many tacos, burritos
Poblanos, taquitos
He can eat only that which he can!
A man had to cancel his plan
To date Sally Rand, the Gal with the Fan
Her feathered fan flew away
On a blustery day
And that was too much for this man!
Is this one an improvement?
A man had to cancel his plan
To date Sally, the Gal with the Fan
Her fan flew away
On a blustery day
And that was too much for this man!
A gal had to cancel a plan
Tp write limericks as well as Mad can.
She found a few words
But also that she needed a dictionary
And her third and fourth lines didn’t scan.
Granny, you just gave me a good chuckle! Thanks :)
A man had to cancel his plan
To relax on the beach, get a tan;
He was called into work
(Yeah, the boss was a jerk)
So he’s still pasty white, in his van.
A man had to cancel his plan
To ensnare more believers: that man
Was Osama bin Laden,
[Yes!] finally caught in
A compound in north Pakistan.
A man had to cancel his plan
In his hideout, which Seals overran ~
Little man, shun that mansion,
Your overexpansion
Has led to your fall. {Yes, We Can!}
A gal had to cancel her plan
To marry her manic man Stan,
For his sister Suzy,
A flirt and floozy,
Whisked her off to do the Can-Can.
A gal had to cancel her plans
Now bottles go in warming pans
She had triplets, you see
Breastfeeding? Not three!
Alas, she has only two….hands.
A gal had to cancel her plan
to boink the gardening man
she nibbled her tongue
from afar he looked hung
alas just the watering can.
Thanks so much for your kind words and fun limericks. Please keep them coming. And if you’re on Facebook, please cross-post them on my Facebook post.
A gal had to cancel her plan
To keep boyfriend, and friendship with Fran;
Caught the pair on Fran’s Sealy
And exclaimed, “I don’t really
Understand why you’re here, under Stan!?”
Quite impaired, the pair answered back freely:
Fran declared, “Anne, you’re not the real deal! He
Came over last night,
Said how often you fight…”
Stan pitched in: “Things just got touchy-feely.”
Anne retorted, “I’m not Sarah Palin!
Neither one of you’s in for smooth sailin’;
While I’m not into catty,
You’re both drunks, and fat! He
Was never a prize ~ don’t come wailin’!”
And with that, Anne flounced out the front door;
Told herself she had evened the score:
“He’s a bore, she’s a whore ~
They can both kiss my floor!
Where they came from, there’s bound to be more.”
“But next time, I’ll know what I’m needing;
The way I feel now, my heart’s bleeding…”
Promptly went to a dive,
Drank too much ~ took a drive:
“But Officer, I wasn’t speeding!”
“Well, ma’am, you sure were exceeding
The limit by law, and weren’t heeding…”
“Say, you’re cute, for a cop!
Are you into hip hop?”
You might see where this story is leading.
Anne didn’t: continued insisting
That they should go out, date consisting
Of drinks and hors d’oeuvres,
“…just to settle my nerves!”
The upshot? Was booked for resisting.
A gal had to cancel her plan
To date a new, promising man:
“Your divan is divine,
That’s a really good sign!”
Then she scanned the floor: “Cyan! Why, Dan?!”
A gal had to cancel her plan
Of getting to know a Blue Man.
Violet preferred Pink:
“So attractive, I think!”
Added, “Of cyan, I’m no big fan.”
A gal had to cancel her plan
To marry a lovestruck young man;
Les was Moore, but too poor,
So she walked out the door:
Sights on Trump ~ of his rump a huge fan.
A gal had to cancel her plan
To elope, thus estrange her rich clan:
“It’d be such a hassle
To fund my own castle,”
She whined: best to find a rich man.
A gal had to cancel her plan
To capture the tan, wealthy man:
He stressed, “Sure, I’m Rich ~
But you’re Shirley [a bitch!]
So I’m ditching you, for my friend Dan…”
A man had to cancel his plan
(Could have led as the head of the Klan):
For Osama bin Laden,
No more in high cotton,
It ended there in Pakistan.
A man had to cancel his plan
When the Board on his film slapped a ban
For invoking such terror ~
His judgment in error ~
That members barfed into their flan.
A gal had to cancel her plan,
of waiting for just the right man.
Due to war and disease,
and Mayan prophecies,
she thought she’d get laid while she can.
A gal had to cancel her plan
To get married, all due to her glan-
Dular problems: her thyroid
Caused weight gain ~ “Goodbye, Lloyd!
I’d thought you a much kinder man.”
Scott, I prophesy that Mad will hit the one hundred mark for limerick contributions before too much longer ~ I’m unable to Peru-ve it, but I Belize so :^D
A man had to cancel his plan:
Dreamed of winning a cool hundred gran’
By posting, per Mad,
All his limericks – bad;
We’re relieved: let’s give Mad a big han’!
A gal had to cancel her plan
To get her whole house spic ‘n span:
“My thoughts are plain dirty
Ever since I hit thirty;
I’ll find – for his mind! – some fiiine man…”
I agree, 3 cheers for the Mad one!
Patrice, if you haven’t done so already, you need to read the discussion Madeleine had on Facebook last night (this morning) with a couple of ‘friends’ who tried to take her to task for penning ‘Ode to bin-Laden’s Death. good stuff
Thanks very much Patrice and Scott! And Scott, help me convince Patrice to join Facebook!!! :)
Patrice, we’d love to read your poems on FB. If security is an issue (and it is concerning to me) you can set your security settings to block outgoing information and who you can respond to. I can not respond to groups or other peripheral invites on FB without changing my security settings, which I don’t do. I know that Julian Assaunge(sp) says that FB is the CIA’s best spying tool but I figure that if the spooks want to spy on someone, they’ll get it done with or without FB. Just my opinion.
SC
A gal had to cancel her plan
To demolish the gingerbread man
When his raisin eyes pleaded
And pink lips proceeded
To yell, “Put me back in the pan!”
haha…all in her head…hmmm…the real life guys may want to watch out for this one…
A man had to cancel his plan
To the dish his wife couldn’t stand
Addicted to sports
She files divorce
They end as he high-fives his friends
A guy had to cancel his plan
To move to Mars with his clan.
The problem was NASA
Was all out of gasa,
Used up in Afghanistan.
Refreshing poem…
A man had to cancel his plan,
to go and see The Music Man.
‘Cuz I’d rather stay here,
with a pipe and a beer,
and watch Kyle and Cartman and Stan.
now that was a complicated relationship… and you expressed it so simply!
Thanks so much everyone for your kind words and limericks. And please keep those limericks coming. There’s plenty of time to be considered for Limerick of the Week!
Barbara Isard-Stone says:
May 4, 2011 at 6:55 am
A gal had to cancel her plan,
“It’s fine,” said the garbage man.
“Put it all in a small moving van.”
So, she got up the nerve,
To leave the suburb,
Go condo and play in a band.
lolz… the dreamer that she was!! Poor thing though…
But your limericks are totally AWESOME, Madeleine!!
Here’s mine..
A gal had to cancel her plan
Of fooling around with her clan
Cuz her mom went dotty
About her dort being naughty
And on her devilry, she’d put a ban!
teeheehee..
A big man had to cancel his plan
for World Domination in a can.
He found the best vendor,
and some legal tender.
The gals could open it, but no man.
Thanks everyone for your limericks, and thanks Kavita for your kind words. Please keep those limericks coming!
brilliant collection of limericks madeleine. :)
The Great Facebook Debate ~ With Myself
Gosh, Mad and Scott, I’m quite gratified ~ and intensely curious about Mad’s ode and the bin Laden discussion! With my ego joining in, all three of you are ganging up on me: if we went out for coffee in person to discuss it, I have the sinking feeling that I could end up going over to the Dark Side :^D
Confession time: Mad, I’ve “joined” Facebook since telling you I’m not on it, just last week and only to do a search (with no luck); however, all I’ve really done is establish an account. To my chagrin, thinking I was being stealthy by using a fictitious last name, I heard a sudden Ding! while searching ~ and up came a list of all the people who’d ever invited me to join. My jaw dropped /8^O Betrayed by my email address: aiiieeee!! Let me tell you, I clicked on nothing further and closed the tab posthaste…
I’m flattered, it’s quite to your credit :)
I’d love to be “published”: I get it;
Could let the chips fall,
Just be “seen” by us all ~
Need to edit? It’s “wrong”? “Elsewhere read it”?
[“But I SWEAR it’s mine!” Nah, forget it…it’d be far too late to regret it.]
I’m a writer clear down to my toes.
Sure, Scott, there’s security woes;
But I’m no Facebook-ie,
Just one stubborn cookie.
(I suppose I could argue in prose…)
When I write, time and space disappear ~
I’m intent yet at peace, it’s so clear
That I “own” each laugh, moan;
In The Zone, though alone,
I reach out: we connect! I hear, here :)
But this is (one) heart of the matter:
I’m online a LOT, and risk “fatter” :(
Yet like bouncing ideas,
Curr. events, breezy see-yas;
Posting solo, my illusions might shatter
[and to the four winds they’d then scatter :( ]
Already too much in my head,
Facebook FEELS wrong for me {sense of dread};
Here, I get Mad’s community
And a good sense of unity
Regardless of varied lives led.
There’s NO pressure here, it’s pure fun :))))))
Love to “seed”, weed, and read: dose of sun!
Thank you both, means a lot :)
But time can’t be caught, bought ~
Here, no matter the “winners”, I’ve won!
I’ve given this whole thing a lot of thought since reading your postings yesterday, and thank you both for helping me to clarify my longtime twinges of uneasiness and personal reaction to FB. I appreciate the therapy! [As the young girl in Jurassic Park says with great relish after she manages, online, to relock the compound doors: “You asked for it, you got it!!” Got me, not Toyota…] I would really welcome thoughts or comments because, as a huge analyzer, I’m concerned about being too insular with this.
Some key thoughts:
• I’ve received a number of Facebook invitations over time, and have steadfastly declined. My contrariness only deepened after a couple of people mentioned interesting FB photos that I “would love, and really should see”, but when I asked if they could email me the photo in mind (one, not a whole series), they said in triumph: Well, that’s why you should get on Facebook yourself! Uummm: thanks a lot – for nothing; I just don’t need to see your photo all THAT much, so forget I asked. It was almost as if I had personally rejected them! ?!
Insights, thoughts on this? Did I perhaps seem to be opting out of connecting with people, then asked to do so in a way that would mean extra effort for them, so they lashed out? {Yes, you must be a mind reader to answer this :) Comments welcomed anyway! Life is awash in inference, speculation, educated (or not) guesses, and individual perception above all…}
• One contradiction of social networks, as I see them (say, Mad’s forum IS one, isn’t it?!): they generally seem bloated by one’s ego, yet too darn lonely at the same time: an ego wall in a cave!! Is that the point, to declare who we are to each other, to say I’m here and I matter, so – please! – listen to me!? And respond, da*n you, so I KNOW you’re out there and listening, watching… Listening is okay; but maybe only due to word association, the watching part gives me the creeps :( We each live and die alone, as frightening as that realization is for most of us; so Facebook interaction can be comfort-seeking at a very basic level… [umm, yet another email invitation just came in, this one for LinkedIn…]
I’ve bounced this off my husband, who has a very different personality but similar views. Could many FB users simply be okay with all of this?
• FB feels like a sop to my ego, which is already insecure yet alternately huge about certain skills, such as writing. I’m aware that I need to develop and practice more balance in my life, and this seems like exactly what I don’t need: yet more time online! Indignation over any negative comments received, thus impelled to respond and defend! If complimented, driven to post more (of whatever) just like it, Right Now! (Please compliment me again, and soon…) With disgust, I see that I’m a rat on a wheel of my own making: funny, but sad :( Etc., etc. ad nauseam, ad infinitum :(
How do others with FB pages see this?
• My friends and family share many similar traits, but I have a distinct sense of being a different Me with each of them. I’ve come to realize that it’s my norm – and I LIKE – presenting/revealing different aspects of myself to different people, because depending on who THEY are, what we have in common, etc., I emphasize certain facets of myself in return. It feels disorienting, constraining, and “trapped” to think of being merely one FB personality presented to the world at large: if I’m the same thing to all people, have I lost the richness and complexity of my own self?? And how could I possibly choose which one face to wear online? I think of carnival funhouse mirrors, reflecting back ME ME ME yet none of them are real (all would be the one Me of my FB page, if I had one); robots, clones, pod people, even Stepford Wives(!) ~ anyone seen Bruce Willis in the film Surrogates and its alluring yet pitfall-filled premise?! This point hits on a crucial part of who I am and how I choose to interact with the world.
Does anyone else feel like this, or…?
• I realize that reaching numerous people at once through FB can be more efficient than emailing separately, even to groups or by distribution list, but see point above: I happen to favor one-on-one communication for the most part. Even when forwarding jokes, sending animated holiday emails, etc., I carefully select my recipients ~ no, one size does NOT fit all. It may help to know that I’m an introvert who needs frequent alone time to recharge, though I’ve developed an extraverted self over time, all to the good :) It follows that I also have privacy concerns about one friend knowing what I’m saying to or being told by other friends ~ it feels voyeuristic, even if unwitting. Guess I’m fairly secretive, but that’s me. Thoughts?
Thanks, Mad community! :^D See, I am reaching out, albeit my way. Thanks for reading this, those of you who did ~ hey, I complied with the limerick format, so please don’t Kane me: I have no wish to make you Mad {you already are!! and that’s a good thing}. Instead, this time permit me to get off Scott-free :)
[T h e D a r k S i d e h a s t a k e n o v e r…temporarily? “Mad, perhaps you could friend me after all, just long enough for me to peruse at length your bin Laden ode and that enticing discussion…my fictitious last name is ~~~”] I await with open heart whatever response(s) the Universe sees fit to provide :)
~ P ~
Johanna, I really enjoyed your gingerbread-man theme, especially its vividness ~ this could be one that pans out for the week :)
Thanks, Trisha!
Patrice, there are certainly things about Facebook that annoy me. (In fact I’ll be posting a new limerick about one of them in the next few days.) But I personally find it well worth the occasional annoyance or aggravation. In particular the community that’s active in my Facebook Limerick-Off postings is a delightful group of people, some of whom often don’t post on my blog for some reasons that escape me. :)
That said, you’re right to be concerned about spending more time online, if that’s a problem for you. Facebook can be addictive for many people. So that’s something you can only evaluate for yourself.
If you want to at least give my Limerick-Off posts and other posts a look, you can either friend me here or send me a private email with your Facebook page address and Facebook name and I’ll send you a friend request.
Mad, I can appreciate all that you said. Will friend you, and see what there is to see ~ curiosity is a driving force of the human condition :)
Patrice, somehow I think that you would more than hold your own in any discussion.
Like Madeleine, there are many things about FB that annoy me too.
I often use the ‘go offline’ option when I’m there so no one can hit me up for a chat. I feel that if I want to chat with someone, I’ll pick up the phone and call them. (I know, that’s SO old-fashioned.)
I have seen 3rd parties using ‘friends’ names to send invites on FB, so you need to be vigilant.
But good luck. We look forward to seeing you there and I think you’ll find that it’s not that evil.
Scott ;-)
Thanks, Scott! :) I’m now deep in the midst of the 2011 Pew Research Political Typology Quiz website, comparing the 8 typology groups across issues ~ fascinating stuff. Will be posting to Mad’s fb page soon…
I too (three) find aspects of FB annoying, already, as a brand-new user:
what’s “gotten my goat” is that my messages to possible old friends triggered Abusive Content rejections – ?!? :(((( I spent some time, in vain, trying to reword my messages – e.g., should I change “laid off” to “downsized” in hopes my message would then go through? Yes, do chuckle ~ but it wasn’t funny at the time…!
I eventually found my frustrated way to the site FAQs on abusive content, and though I wasn’t blocked officially [notified], effectively I wasn’t able to message anyone any further. I fail to see how the number of messages I send to potential contacts is in any way a problem or abuse of the FB site; my content is very appropriate, so apparently FB simply does not want people using the message function “too” often if it’s not to an established Friend. [The onsite explanation struck me as simply nonsensical.] Is it just me, or does this policy seem directly opposed to people’s increased usage of FB, which you’d think would be desirable? Does FB really stand for Flatulent Baloney, or maybe Frustrated and Balked? I’m sorry, but: ARE YOU GUYS NUTS???!!
Ahem. I’m back now. I was finally able to send one important message that resulted in – yes, Mad!! – actually reconnecting with a Second friend :) but have one more to send…I’ll retry today, but have low to no confidence in success…grrrr :(
To wrap up on a positive note, thanks in part to you, Scott, I have very carefully adjusted my FB personal settings ~ I appreciated your “word to the wise” :)
Sign me for now,
New User Blues – On FB, One Can’t Always Choose :(
I suppose I should post a limerick on topic now, just to reaffirm my alignment with this blog’s purpose :))
A gal had to cancel her plan
To “force” FB to meet her deman’
That her missives be sent,
As they would not relent;
She resents this: it just doesn’t scan!
A gal had to cancel her plan
To contact the Gingerbread Man
“I’m content with my content…
Abusive??!” Goes unsent ~
So he never learned of the han’
That would gingerly grab him with mitt.
[Johanna inspired me: admit! :)]
He was hot! Just a taste,
No crumbs wasted ~ he faced
Hungry maw moving closer… {oh, quit!}
A gal had to cancel her plan
To start every day with some bran
She thought she’d explode
While on the commode
Thank god for the bathroom vent fan.
Mad, Scott, I simply must share my glee – hee – hee…
I’m still being blocked from messaging a potential Friend, BUT !!! have been able to message her anyway, with only the Subject line filled in – critical info only in two successive messages. My Sent page shows the trail; I am DANCING with joy! (okay, only figuratively ~ nonetheless!!)
:^p :^D :^P
A man had to cancel his plan
To pee in a watering can
When a rabbit jumped out,
Banged his wang with its snout
And diverted his spout to a pan.
A man had to cancel his plan,
To balance the budget again,
Let’s go lay a wreath
And relive all the grief,
Let’s grab a few fans while we can!
The big moment is upon us. No, NOT Mother’s Day. I’m referring to the latest Limerick-Off Limerick of the Week results. And the winners are: Limerick-Off contest results 8.
Congratulations to the winners! As is so often the case, there were so many fine submissions that picking Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions was quite a challenge!
Although this contest is over, don’t feel left out. A new Limerick-Off has just begun. You can find this week’s Limerick-Off right here.