Limerick Affairs
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow who had an affair…
Here’s mine:
Limerick Affairs
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow who had an affair
Got caught by his lovely wife, Claire.
She considered divorce —
Took a far diff’rent course.
Now her spouse does not live anywhere.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.
Tags: Divorce Humor, Husband Wife Humor, Husband Wife Limerick, Legal Limerick, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
A fellow who had an Affair
To Remember Cary Grant would share
And then Deborah Kerr
Created a stir
When she got hit by a car in Times Square.
EEK! That was surprising, but very good, Mad.
A fellow who had an affair
With a lovely Norwegian au pair
Had a strange deja vu
Then declared “Husker du?”
For the whole thing was quite laissez faire.
A fellow who had an affair,
Thought he was quite debonair,
Yet when he checked out,
He left little doubt,
That he should have stayed in his lair.
A fellow who had an affair…
With a bunny in a smoky briar
When he made the pass
She was high on grass
And he on brown sugar, a real high flier
A young man who had an affair,
Broke his vows with hardly a care.
The girl thought he was single,
That’s why she did mingle.
Wife found out, now both need repair.
A fellow who had an affair
Knew that he shouldn’t have dared
His wife is a sleuth and
Having given her youth can
Extract her revenge without care…
A fellow who had an affair
Thought his wife was totally unaware
But, imagine his surprise
When he noticed her eyes
Following him up his lover’s back stair!
A fellow who had an affair
Snuck back in the house with a flair
He tucked himself in
Feeling guilty as sin
But felt worse when hit by a chair…
A fellow who had an affair
Lost his car, his house and his hair
The girlfriend is gone
Said he’s ‘not the one’
Now lonely, his children don’t care
A fellow who had an affair
Thought his wife had remained unaware,
‘Til his picture was clicked
In flagrante delict’
By that hard-boiled gumshoe Pierre.
I’m really enjoying these. Thanks! And please keep them coming!
ODE TO L.B.
A fellow who had an affair
Lied again to his wife without care
He tried too late deck her…
She’d cut off his pecker
Lorena bobbed it to end her despair!
A fellow who had an affair
Thought himself to be quite debonair
‘Til the day the bell rang;
“Fresh towels, sir!” the maid sang:
Caught thereby with his a** in the air.
A fellow who had an affair
Spent his funds on fine silk underwear
His eyes were a’glisten
Pled, “Ann, will you not listen?
Those are mine! I prefer you be bare…”
A fellow who had an affair,
Did his romping with nary a fear.
Until that night, out driving,
Wife spied them both grinding,
With headlights and him now the deer.
A fellow who had an affair
Blamed a long game of Truth or Dare
His wife didn’t mind
Cause she told him, “You’ll find
last night on your pillow I put Nair.”
A fellow who had an affair
saw bright rainbows in sunny air
until his mad wife
threatened his life
and now, he no longer goes there.
Oh good! More limericks. Thanks!
A fellow who had an affair
Tried to softly sneak up the stair,
But the third one, it squeaked;
So his secret was leaked;
For his wife was waiting up there.
A fellow who had an affair
Went walking in Washington Square
Felt like a louse
Bumped into his spouse
So they patched it all up then and there…
A fellow who had an affair
Felt guilty for having gone there
So he fell to his knees
Crying, “Please, wifey, please…
It’s you for whom I really care!”
A fellow who had an affair
Hung out at the Folies Bergère
His wife wandered in
Accused him of sin
Then flew home to her ma in Eau Claire
HUNTING SEASON – HIGH CALIBER WOMAN
A fellow who had an affair
Told his wife one night on a dare
‘Fessed up he’d been sinning
Yet he couldn’t stop grinning
As she yanked out all of his hair