Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: BALL or BAWL at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using either BALL or BAWL at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

A fellow was having a ball,
Ignoring his work while on call.
He continued his con
Till the owner caught on;
Playing hooky … and hockey … his fall.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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76 Responses to “Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: BALL or BAWL at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5”

  1. Jon Gearhart says:

    The batter was beaned each and all
    Of his trips to the plate, spring to fall.
    When he was asked why
    He gets hit every try,
    He said, “I keep my eye on the ball.”

  2. Brian Allgar says:

    He said “Honey, just swallow it all”
    To the hooker who’d answered his call.
    But he hollered in shock
    When she bit off his rock.
    She assured him: “I’m having a ball.”

  3. Brian Allgar says:

    They had come to Count Dracula’s ball,
    And the lovely young guests filled the hall.
    As they danced, he would drain
    Each delectable vein;
    Before dawn, he had emptied them all.

  4. Brian Allgar says:


    He had cracked when he fell off the wall;
    What was left of him started to bawl.
    He had drunk himself legless,
    And now he was eggless –
    A puddle of yolk, that was all.

  5. Brian Allgar says:

    He’d created a planet, quite small;
    It was square, and he tried to recall
    Why it looked rather odd.
    “Oh, I’ve got it!” said God,
    “It ought to be shaped like a ball.”

  6. Brian Allgar says:

    They say size doesn’t matter at all,
    But if you’re incredibly small
    It can make you feel dumb
    To hear, after you’ve come,
    “Let me know when you’re ready to ball.”

  7. Jon Gearhart says:

    One night at an Embassy ball
    Yvonne dirty danced with Charles. All
    That were there thought, “What nerve
    As to dance like a perv!”
    But they all knew that she’d had de Gaulle.

  8. Jon Gearhart says:

    In her best lady-like southern drawl:
    “I just hope you remember to call.
    My favorite team
    Is the Cowboys. My dream
    Just came true with y’all–what a ball!”

  9. Jon Gearhart says:

    Found her name in a men’s bathroom stall
    And decided I’d give her a call,
    But I feel quite misled
    By these words that I read:
    “Call Caitlyn and you’ll have a ball!”

  10. Brian Allgar says:

    She was wearing a costly mink shawl,
    And the bimbo explained to them all:
    “It’s a gift from a guy
    Who just wanted to cry,
    ‘Cos he said to me, “Baby, let’s bawl.”

  11. Brian Allgar says:

    To make haggis, you start with the caul
    Of a sheep, which you fill with a ball
    Of unspeakable rot,
    Then please bury the lot –
    I’d rather eat wormwood and gall.

  12. Judith H. Block says:

    The little girl began to bawl
    Her father, like many, did fall,
    He fought for their rights
    Reached new and great heights
    His bravery always enthrall.

  13. Judith H. Block says:

    The little boy had a red ball
    It made him feel proud, six feet tall,
    “You’ll play by my rules
    And not act like fools,
    Or else you just can’t play at all!”

  14. Judith H. Block says:

    A guy really did drop the ball,
    Was busy and forgot to call.
    His date was so mad
    She thought him a cad
    And said not to bother at all.

  15. Oh, please don’t disturb Doctor Hall.
    Cutting gonads in slices so small
    May yet give the answer
    To testicle cancer,
    And right now, he’s halving a ball.

  16. Cinderella, on fleeing the ball,
    Her little glass slipper let fall.
    But she had to confess
    That her little glass dress
    Worked much better her prince to enthrall.

  17. Judith H. Block says:

    In times now, can one have it all?
    Be mindful and still have a ball?
    With chaos abounding
    One’s joy takes a pounding
    The crises now simply appall.

  18. Judith H. Block says:

    Revised version- please delete previous version:

    My gerbil is king of dance hall
    In fantasy, he has a ball,
    He will steal your heart
    He’s cute and he’s smart
    With his dancing skills he’ll enthrall.

    Note from MBK: Done.

  19. Judith H. Block says:

    Revised version- please delete previous version:

    There once was a guy with one ball
    Didn’t bother the ladies at all
    He’d get them in bed
    And WOW, enough said!
    With sexual skills he’d enthrall.

    Note from MBK: Done.

  20. Kristin Smith says:

    from Phyllis Sterling Smith

    The belle had gone to the ball
    But she was considered too tall.
    Like vines and like leaves,
    Ivy too if you please,
    She found herself fixed to the wall.

  21. Lisi Nortman says:

    I saw my name on the bathroom wall
    It said”Call Lisa and have a ball”

    I started grieving
    and just not believing

    Not a single person called me at all

  22. Kristin Smith says:

    from Phyllis Sterling Smith:

    A lost love is reason to bawl
    But I didn’t cry, not at all.
    He wasn’t my kind
    And I really don’t mind.
    I’m too short and he is too tall.

  23. Kristin Smith says:

    Phyllis Sterling Smith writes:

    When Sally slipped in a fall
    She really had reason to bawl.
    But balling for Sally
    Is right up her alley
    For Sally has no shame at all.

  24. Kristin Smith says:

    This one from Phyllis Sterling Smith. (She sings it to a tune)

    There once was a day, I recall,
    When I was the belle of the ball.
    I danced and I danced
    As they stood there entranced.
    How I wish I could bring back it all.

  25. Kristin Smith says:

    from Phyllis Sterling Smith. Cinderella’s Lament

    My automobile likes to stall
    So I wander along at a crawl.
    I hope it will last
    As it has in the past..
    At least till I get to the ball.

  26. Kristin Smith says:

    From Phyllis Sterling Smith.

    Tennis partners both lunged at the ball
    And both of them gave it their all.
    A mid-air collision
    Reversed their decision.
    They play no more tennis at all.

  27. Ed Edwards says:

    At a County Fair I recall
    I heard the showman bawl
    “Roll up! Have a go!
    It’s 5 cents a throw.
    You could win a Kewpie dawl.”

  28. When a carpenter quipped to his doll,
    “When I die, dear, I’ll leave you my all!”
    She trumped his homophone
    With one of her own,
    “At your graveside, I’ll have me a bawl!”

  29. Ian Graham says:

    At the FIFA World Women’s Cup, Paul’s
    That well-endowed trainer who bawls
    A haunting reproach:
    “Girls, I’m just your coach.
    Concentrate. Keep your eyes off the balls.”

  30. Lisi Nortman says:

    At our hotel, all I did was bawl
    There were giant roaches in the hall

    The food was crummy
    It hurt my tummy

    And the owner said, “Come back next year, y’all”

  31. Lisi Nortman says:

    If you go to our brand new mall
    There’s a place to play Bocce ball

    The designer was crocked
    And people were shocked

    That the target was the bathroom stall

  32. Lisi Nortman says:


    I saw my name on a bathroom wall
    It said, “Call Lisa to have a ball”

    I started to grieve
    And could not believe

    No one called me at all!

  33. Colonialist says:

    A lady who grew somewhat tall
    Was never the belle of the ball,
    Till with netball she found
    That she moved around
    In new circles, and netted them all.

  34. Lisi Nortman says:

    Thanksgiving dinner is never a ball
    When the “crazies” arrive from Crestwood Fall

    They eat gobs and gobs
    Like a bunch of slobs

    And cousin Janey’s always stoned on phenobarbital

  35. Lisi Nortman says:

    Karen said I would have a ball
    When she introduced me to a man real tall

    I came up to his waist
    I was very well-placed

    She’s one raunchy matchmaker after all!

  36. Lisi Nortman says:

    Dimaggio had a lucky ball
    He kept it hidden in a tiny hall

    He wouldn’t let anyone feel it
    So afraid they would steal it

    But he did let Marilyn pay a call

  37. Lisi Nortman says:

    Mad: change of 2 words in previous limerick

    The patient did so loudly bawl
    In the emergency room at Forest Hall

    We checked his bladder
    AND JUST couldn’t be gladder

    But we did have to remove his gall

  38. Casi says:

    A north man from up river did call
    Here upon the great beauty of all.

    With red ruby lips – Snow.
    Tried a kiss, she dealt blow.

    He then flew back and began to bawl.

  39. Errol Nimbly says:

    Astronomers once had the gall
    To proclaim, “The world’s round, like a ball.”
    But soon findings empirical
    Proved it non-spherical;
    Slightly deflating them all.

  40. Errol Nimbly says:

    Mad. please change last line to:
    Slightly deflating them all.
    for TAM improvement.
    Thx :)

    From MBK: Done. :)

  41. Old Bill lost a ball in a fall.
    His doctors were forced to install
    A brass scrotum, which rings
    When his testicle swings —
    Poor Bill. He’s the Bell of the Ball.

  42. Bob Leggett says:

    A time travelling alien Called Paul
    Materialized in the County hall
    It was quite a surprise
    He won second prize
    For the mid-summer fancy dress ball

  43. Jon Gearhart says:

    I attended a charity ball
    Thinking, “Give cash and ladies will fall
    In love with my checkbook
    And give me some nook nook.”
    But no poon in ten did at all.

  44. Errol Nimbly aka Byron Miller says:

    “Oh Adam,” said Eve, “you’re a doll;
    Sampling apples with you is a ball.
    Now slip out from beneath
    My bedraggled fig leaf
    And we’ll pick it up after The Fall.”

  45. Lisi Nortman says:

    I said “Go out and have a ball”
    But I didn’t mean find a Call

    Girl whose fetid scent
    Smelled like Pine Sol and cement

    Next time we’ll go to the mall!

  46. Lisi Nortman says:

    We went to the shopping mall
    I said, “We’ll have a ball”

    After 3 hours at the Gap
    My very handsome chap

    Sneaked away to the notorious Pub Crawl

  47. Lisi Nortman says:

    The ad said, “I am small
    But with me, you’ll have a ball”

    The guy was very brazen
    And was hung like a raisin

    But my microscope found his crown jewels after all

  48. Fred Bortz says:


    “Baba-lou!” was his Cuban drum call
    To his red-headed bride, Lucille Ball.
    Though she acted the ditz,
    In the biz, she had wits:
    Desilu made them rich after all.

  49. David Reddekopp says:

    When her website had started to stall
    She had feared that she might lose it all
    In the time it was down
    She was wearing a frown
    And it caused our dear Mad Kane to bawl.

  50. Phil Graham says:

    Bored with puppies, Pavlov felt the call
    To condition a good-looking moll
    Made her sob ev’ry time
    That the church tower would chime
    So he called it “the bell of the bawl.”

  51. Phil Graham says:

    A testicular doctor named Dahl
    Kept a very odd chart on his wall
    Each month, set a quota
    Of how many scrota
    To feel which had only one ball.

  52. Lisi Nortman says:

    I was sitting on the bathroom stall
    When in rolled a little ball

    On it was a note
    And it wrote:

    “You’re in the Men’s Masonic Hall”

  53. Lisi Nortman says:

    I was sitting on the ladies stall
    When in rolled a little ball

    On it was a note
    So very clearly wrote:

    “You’re in the Men’s Masonic Hall”

  54. 2015

    I turn off the news, and I crawl
    To a shadowy corner, and sprawl.
    I think of the things
    That this dreadful year brings,
    And I cover my eyes, and I bawl.

  55. (Out of competition — in some parts of the country, “bawl” is pronounced like “ball”, and in others — like mine — “ball” is often made to sound like “bawl”. But I hate mixing them…)

    There’s a demagogue — Glenn — who can bawl
    On command, over nothing at all.
    It turns out the trick’s
    Just a smidgen of Vicks’,
    And the tears flow at Glenn’s Beck and call.

  56. Paul Dickey says:

    There’s a new one runnin’, you all —
    from the swamps and named Jindal.
    It remains to be seen
    anyone on his team
    though will let him touch the ball.

  57. Kristin Smith says:

    This is from Phyllis’s son, Otto JA Smith:

    In playing Olympic football
    There’s really no fairness at all.
    France’s beautiful play
    Was taken away.
    The ref said they had too much Gaul.

  58. Kristin Smith says:

    From Phyllis Sterling Smith:

    Under the Christmas tree tall
    The gifts were a doll, bat and ball.
    The bat was for Molly,
    Her bro choose the dolly..
    That’s the way that they wanted it all.

  59. Allen Wilcox says:

    When Tom Brady answered the call,
    He had friends feel his balls -we thought all –
    And produce the right size.
    They were caught, among whys
    Was why not deflate the twelfth ball?

  60. Dave Johnson says:

    It wasn’t too close of a call;
    They really had no case at all.

    It’s over and done,
    Obamacare won;

    At FOX they can sit there and bawl.

  61. Dave Johnson says:

    The player is skinny and tall
    Who’s joining the Knicks in the fall.

    This NBA pick
    Made everyone sick;

    The fans are just having a bawl.

  62. Dave Johnson says:

    A nod to Brian A.

    After Humpty had his great fall,
    Mrs. Dumpty would sit there and bawl.

    But there is no shame;
    They’ve trademarked his name

    For an omelette cafe at the mall.

  63. Allen Wilcox says:


    We’re having a civil rights ball.
    The Confederate flag has to fall.
    There is much more to do
    Before we are through.
    How many will answer the call?

    And then? – the Obamacare ball
    With Roberts explaining it all.
    There is much more to do
    Before we are through.
    How many will answer the call?

    And then? – well, the gay marriage ball
    With Kennedy telling it all.
    There is much more to do
    Before we are through.
    How many will answer the call?

  64. Dave Johnson says:

    Allen W – that is awesome.

  65. Dave Johnson says:

    Scalia and Thomas will bawl
    “This week has been no fun at all.

    Our cadre of five
    Did no longer strive

    To answer the G.O.P.’s call.”

  66. Dave Johnson says:

    Three-fingered Hoots was wearin’ some boots
    That made him look skinny and tall.

    He met him a gal named Bow-legged Sal
    And soon they was havin’ a ball.

    They rolled through the night all buzzy and tight,
    Then things sorta ground to a halt.

    Hoot’s fingers found out – beyond any doubt
    Ol’ Sal was a feller named Walt.

  67. Dave Johnson says:

    They’ve manufactured a doll
    So perfectly lifelike and all

    That now they must start
    On a male counterpart

    That she might be willing to ball.

  68. Lisi Nortman says:

    She fixed me up with her cousin Paul
    Told me, “Don’t worry; you’ll have a ball”

    We went for a swim
    I lost sight of him

    I almost sank home, doing the crawl

  69. Lisi Nortman says:

    Papa gave me his beloved prayer shawl
    He said “Wear this and you’ll have it all”

    I prayed for a “He”
    with the sensitivity of a “She”

    I was so happy when in walked RuPaul

  70. Dave Johnson says:

    She appeared at the Debutante Ball;
    Then down the staircase she did fall.

    The cause of this mess
    Was under her dress;

    Those CFM heels were too tall.

  71. Kirk Miller says:

    When making some holes rather small,
    A leather punch started to bawl.
    “We’re stuck in this job,”
    It said with a sob,
    “And that is the fate of us awl.”

  72. Kirk Miller says:

    An arrogant groundskeeper, Saul,
    Thinks cutting the lawn is a ball.
    Since he likes to cut grass,
    Many lawns he’ll amass.
    The guy is a real mow-it-all.

  73. Kirk Miller says:

    After many a day of snowfall,
    To the snowgirl the snowman did call,
    “I do hope that perchance,
    You would like to go dance.
    And the venue, of course: the Snow Ball.”

    Brokenhearted, the snowman did bawl,
    And was filled with a feeling of gall.
    Though she thought he looked chic,
    And admired his physique,
    For his nose she did not carrot all.

  74. Fred Bortz says:

    The cannibals started a brawl
    Over who got what portion of Paul.
    They battled for dibs
    On the meatiest ribs,
    While the chieftain was having a ball.

  75. Tim James says:

    In my cereal, rolled in a ball,
    I found a dead rodent. “Appall”
    Is too feeble a word.
    When the food maker heard,
    The result was a Total recall.

  76. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun week of limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners: Limerick of the Week 219.

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Limerick-Off Rhyme Jerk.