Mining Limericks (Limerick-Off Monday) Rhyme Word: Mine

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

“The promotion he got should be mine…”*


A fellow who worked in a mine…*


A woman was trying to mine…*


A youngster yelled out “That toy’s mine…”*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

This week I’ve written two sample limericks:

Mining That Data
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow whose job was to mine
Online data, by email would whine
About “nit-picking rules
Caused by privacy fools.”
(Hackers accessed his email, just fine.)


Personal Shopping
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A customer yelled out “That’s mine,”
After cutting in front of the line.
But two gals now behind her
Proceeded to bind her
In holiday ribbon and twine.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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69 Responses to “Mining Limericks (Limerick-Off Monday) Rhyme Word: Mine”

  1. Kirk Miller says:

    The auto mechanic of mine
    Was lying and had to resign.
    Said the wheels are not straight
    On my car. I just hate
    When he’s trying to feed me align.

  2. Colonialist says:

    A fellow who worked in a mine
    Came up to the surface all crine;
    He sobbed, ‘From a blast
    My future’s now past,
    I skip to the end of the line!’

    “The promotion he got should be mine!
    I’m by far your besht taster of wine!
    I not only taste it,
    But I never washte it,
    Sho what if my noshe has a shine?”

  3. Judith H. Block says:

    A woman was trying to mine
    All gifts she could get from a swine.
    “He treats me like dirt
    We’ll see who’ll be hurt!
    But first I will pile him with wine.”

  4. Judith H. Block says:

    A woman was trying to mine
    A guy with a lifestyle so fine..
    He’s worth many millions
    Perhaps even billions..
    She’d gladly be his concubine.

  5. Judith H. Block says:

    The promotion she got should be mine..
    Our rich boss is indeed a sick swine.
    I won’t suck his dick
    That disgusting prick!
    But for her, the idea was just fine.

  6. Judith H. Block says:

    That promotion he got should be mine,
    I’m the one with a brain like Einstein!
    They’re chauvinist pigs
    Those selfish bigwigs
    It’s my choice: should I sue or resign?

  7. Judith H. Block says:

    A fellow who worked in a mine
    Infrequently saw the sun shine.
    Not good for his health,
    No way to get wealth;
    End up in a box made of pine.

  8. Judith H. Block says:

    I purchased some really fine wine.
    Too good not to share, just be mine.
    So we all got drunk
    In wistful mood, sunk…
    And we all sang, “Sweet Caroline”.

  9. Cphenly says:

    Lo the math phobic neighbor of mine:
    To understand trig he does pine.
    He knows not when to choose
    The long hypotenuse.
    Cries he: “Someone please give me a sine!”

  10. Val fish says:

    The promotion she got should be mine
    But because I opted to decline
    The boss’s advances
    I ruined my chances
    If only I’d said yes and not nein.

  11. Charley Simmons says:

    Tarzan said “O Jane love of mine,
    I’ll swing by and we’ll go out to dine”
    Then his now famous yell,
    Burst forth without quell,
    For she reached up and grabbed the wrong vine.

  12. YT Cai says:

    Our mascot down in the coal mine
    Felt we finally had crossed the line
    The reason he’s wary
    Our new pet canary
    “If the bird dies get out” said the sign

  13. YT Cai says:

    Was hoping some day she’d “be mine”
    That’s what it said on the valentine
    I plied her with candy
    Hoping she’d get randy
    From there her figure took a decline

  14. YT Cai says:

    The king wore his finest ermine
    At the feast where served was a swine
    Fattened and suckling
    Belt needed unbuckling
    This pig monarch sure knew how to dine

  15. Jon Gearhart says:

    My darling, if you will be mine
    For tonight, then the moonlight will shine.
    A night such as this is
    Made for hugs and kisses.
    My name is Bill. Here, drink this wine…

  16. Jesse Levy says:

    The promotion he got should be mine!
    As a doctor, he’s really a swine.
    Stealing bodies at night,
    he’ll create such a fright.
    I don’t care if his name’s Frankenstein!

  17. Jon Gearhart says:

    This New Year, great fun will be mine
    As the party lights twinkle and shine
    With confetti gun shooters.
    Gals, show me your hooters
    As I hold up this owled hang sign…

  18. Mark Kane says:

    An old picky girlfriend of mine
    Found fault with wherever we’d dine.
    She’d bitch and complain,
    And just drive me insane.
    Extra time never mellowed that whine.

  19. Daisy Mae Simon says:

    Thank goodness he’s her date, not mine
    My poor friend again got a swine
    For our two weeks abroad
    All her dates were quite flawed
    She’s cross, internat’nal dateline.

  20. Kirk Miller says:

    “At light-speed in gadgets of mine
    You’ll travel,” said Albert Einstein,
    “When my in-laws go fast
    Back in time to the past,
    Relatively, I’ll say, they aren’t mine.”

  21. Thomas Gorman says:

    A woman was trying to mine
    Who wanted to be with me all of the time
    I got so tired,
    And my life became mired,
    But we got married and now everything’s fine.

  22. Thomas Gorman says:

    A fellow who worked in a mine
    Took a spill which broke his spine
    He sued his employer
    Who had a staff of lawyers
    And now he’s permanently inclined.

  23. Thomas Gorman says:

    A youngster yelled out “That toy’s mine”
    To which his mother responded “Must you whine??”
    But the problem was solved
    When she threw away that ball
    And now just everything’s fine.

  24. Thomas Gorman says:

    A woman was trying to be mine
    Who wanted to be with me all of the time
    I got so tired,
    And my life became mired,
    But we got married and now everything’s fine.

    (slight correction of previous post; added ‘be’ to first line. Sorry I hadn’t caught it sooner.)

  25. Sue D says:

    The depths of my psyche I’ll mine,
    I’ll even resort to red wine
    To dredge up a verse
    Be it florid or terse
    With a genuine rhyme in each line.

  26. Andy Bassett says:

    The old kitchen table of mine
    Leans at twenty degrees while I dine
    My salad and eggs
    Tend to roll down my legs
    But hey, that’s the way I incline

  27. Denise Carruthers says:

    The promotion he got should be mine
    His star rose on the back of my shine
    One saving grace
    I’ll remember his face
    and sparking revenge will be fine

  28. Sue D says:

    “The promotion she got should be mine,
    But never will you hear me whine”
    Said the grumpy old clerk
    “It just sounds like more work
    Plus the grapes are all sour on that vine.”

  29. Jon Gearhart says:

    If I had a big diamond mine,
    I’d make your life truly divine.
    If our love life went daft,
    I’d get stuck with the shaft
    But my rocks would remain wholly thine.

  30. Sue D says:

    Next week in this igloo of mine
    With a Christmas-gift bottle of wine
    The old mantel I’ll clear
    For cards early next year
    That commemorate Saint Valentine.

  31. Sue D says:

    A therapist, trying to mine
    The brain of a pun-hooked fraulein
    Asked “Will you please say,
    Just how many today?”
    She gave a sly smile and said “nein”.

  32. Tim James says:

    At times, sweet indulgence is mine;
    With a French gal I get to entwine.
    It’s always a pleasure
    No matter the measure.
    (In metric, it’s still sixty-nine.)

  33. Byron Ives says:

    I just sold a clunker of mine
    It pulled left and was out of align
    I never did let on
    The chance for a head-on
    Hell, other than that it was fine

  34. John Sardo says:

    A fellow who worked in a mine
    Found he had no place to dine.
    So he ordered a pizza
    With plenty of meatsa
    And tipped Papa John a mere dime.
    Papa John says everything’s mine.
    His fortune we know is sublime.
    Cheap labor’s the source
    Of his private golf course
    So he’s living a life on cloud nine.
    Papa John sits atop a gold mine.
    To his wage slaves a raise he’ll decline.
    Should they get hunger cramps
    There’s always food stamps.
    They deserve nothing more says the swine.

  35. Jon Gearhart says:

    I will start this new project of mine
    And carve a full female design.
    I’ll be forming her crack
    From knot holes front and back;
    I’ll make the hole thing from screw pine.

  36. Jon Gearhart says:

    This really hot girlfriend of mine
    Likes to sit on my bed and recline
    In a face up position,
    Disposed to coition,
    Living up to her name as Sue Pine.

  37. Jon Gearhart says:

    I met this new girlfriend of mine
    At 8 in a long conga line
    She stopped; I rear-ended.
    She wasn’t offended
    And did not disengage until 9.

  38. Jon Gearhart says:

    This new hot, kinky girlfriend of mine
    Has a fetish for feet, which is fine.
    She likes squatting on toes
    And you’re right to suppose
    That for her I’ll be toeing the line.

  39. Jon Gearhart says:

    My wife’s an enabler of mine.
    Drinks merlot, cabarnet, Napa vine,
    Champagne, and Chablis,
    And much more, so you see
    When I suckle, she lactates jug wine.

  40. Jon Gearhart says:

    Let me introduce this ex of mine.
    If all you want’s sex, she’ll do fine.
    She’s one butt-ugly case.
    If you don’t mind her face
    And you get past her mace, dick’s on line.

  41. Jon Gearhart says:

    Let me introduce this ex of mine.
    If all you want’s sex, she’ll do fine.
    Otherwise, she’s quite scary.
    In the next dictionary,
    Her face should “butt-ugly” define.

  42. Jon Gearhart says:

    Let me introduce this ex of mine.
    If all you want’s sex, she’ll do fine.
    I found out quite fast
    I’m not first, won’t be last
    By her tramp stamp that says, “Get in line!”

  43. Jon Gearhart says:

    Met the most recent conquest of mine
    At The Sneaky Vine out on Route 9.
    It turned out, she’s a dude
    And I really got screwed
    From behind by her sneaky root vine.

  44. Jon Gearhart says:

    Met the most recent ‘conquest’ of mine
    At a whore house on Route 69.
    Winds up costing you more
    Than you first bargain for
    When her tramp stamp’s a huge dollar sign!

  45. Ron B. says:

    Owning Moaning

    A youngster who’s yelling “It’s mine!”
    thinks “owning” is how you define
    that you want it the worst
    and you get to it first
    and giving it up you decline!

  46. Byron Ives says:

    I offended a buddy of mine
    He bragged that his cat’s fur had shine
    I agreed it had sheen,
    But I said, “It’s not clean,
    There’s spit up and down your feline.”

  47. Byron Ives says:

    My doc said this ‘issue’ of mine,
    Where some parts don’t always incline;
    For thunder down under,
    Just take this blue wonder,
    You’ll be beating your ‘issue’ just fine.”

  48. Kirk Miller says:

    There’s a cop with a dog that is mine
    At my door which could be a bad sign.
    By the roadside, he said,
    Dog gave birth. Why my dread?
    I’ll be getting a littering fine.

  49. Errol Nimbly aka Byron Miller says:

    My diction’s just fine, in the mine,
    Thought Eliza, repeating her line.
    Dr. Iggins’ all weht
    And I’ll mike you a beht
    It doh even rine up in Spine.

  50. Ron B. says:

    Title of my previous should have been “Owning Moaning”. Please correct. Thanks.

    Done. (MBK)

  51. Byron Ives says:

    I asked of a new date of mine,
    “Would touching your pussy be fine?”
    She gasped, “Oh my God!”
    But then touched my rod
    I smiled, ’cause I meant her feline

  52. Byron Ives says:

    To the scouts went a young son of mine
    At the camp loomed a huge wooden sign:
    “Don’t give up your hopes,
    You’ll learn all the ropes,
    Be proud, and never stop twine.”

  53. Ron B. says:

    My Way Robbery

    An engineer worked in a “mine”
    each time he could rightfully whine
    that “…merest of edit
    gave others the credit
    for work that was ‘mine’ by design…”

  54. Ron B. says:

    Raw Deal

    Her promotion should have been mine.
    Though the least in a very long line,
    she has proven I guess
    that “undress for success”
    can make the bared minimum shine.

  55. Jon Gearhart says:

    When I’m offering opinions of mine,
    I’ll say brains will trump looks. It’s a sign
    I do not care, for sure,
    If her face is a four
    If she is above ass o’ nine.

  56. Byron Ives says:

    My ex liked a flip phone of mine
    In her thong, it got slipped, by design
    Preset to vibrate
    Her glee, I’d actuate,
    By dialing her new ‘party line’

  57. Jon Gearhart says:

    You see, this gnu calendar’s mine
    And says this gnu year should be fine.
    My new gal at least
    Ain’t a fat wildebeest
    But my last one sure fit that design!

  58. Jon Gearhart says:

    I am looking for life’s love of mine
    And to start a new life that’s divine.
    I think it’d be Zen
    If her face were a ten
    And at least that her cans, sirs, be nine.

  59. Kirk Miller says:

    There’s an old fishing buddy of mine
    Who when asked how he did will just whine.
    “Should have seen,” he will say
    “The big fish that got away.”
    His lament is a big fishing line.

  60. Allen Wilcox says:

    Fool’s Gold

    The prospector cried, “This mine’s mine”
    As he stood outside at a shrine.
    “God searches for gold
    As I have been told.
    Now I’ll pray and then all will be fine.’

  61. Allen Wilcox says:


    “A great bowling trophy is mine.
    I’ve learned how I must toe the line,
    And I’ve mastered my pace.
    There’s just one thing to face.
    I never knock down more than nine,”

  62. Allen Wilcox says:

    Binary Choice

    “I play football, My future is mine.
    My knowledge of logic is fine.
    I now will give voice
    To my difficult choice;
    I’ll either resign or re-sign,”

  63. Allen Wilcox says:


    “There’re no insults as nasty as mine,
    And trees – well they”ll do me just fine.
    I’m the best in the West,
    And this is the best –
    ‘Your’re as old as a bristlecone pine”.”

  64. Allen Wilcox says:


    She stated with firmness. “You’re mine.”
    I replied, without thinking, “That’s fine.”
    Then she yelled, “Mop the floor.”
    I yelled back, out hte door,
    “I’m ifinished, I’m through, I resign.”

  65. Ron B. says:

    The Bald Truth

    The ill fates of two traits became mine
    by the will of genetic design —
    hair is leaving my head
    at a rate that I dread
    but appears in my ears to grow fine.

  66. Ron B. says:

    Please correct line in previous entry. Line 4 should read:

    “at a rate that I dread”

    (Done — MBK)

  67. Ron B. says:

    Thanks for earlier edits. Sorry to be such a bother, but the first line of my last entry should read “The ill fates of…”, not “The ill fates or…”. The cell phone keyboard and screen are enemies I must confront more aggressively.

    (No problem. I have no idea how anyone uses tiny devices. I have carpal tunnel syndrome, so my wrists spasm if I touch anything smaller than a laptop. MBK )

  68. Byron Ives says:

    That ’64 Falcon was mine!
    Burned rubber in 4 gears just fine
    Rear end posi-traction,
    Four barreled carb action
    I smoked ALL those dweebs off the line

    Got married and that babe was mine!
    Bought a house with her daddy’s co-sign
    He poured me a beverage
    And dished out some leverage
    G’bye Falcon, H’lo Econoline

  69. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun week of limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners: Limerick of the Week 196.

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: The Competitor.