Limerick Brains (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

At work, I’m surrounded by brains…*

or

A woman was racking her brains…*

or

A scientist studying brains…*

or

A fellow who liked to eat brains…*

or

A man who was more brawn than brains…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Brains
By Madeleine Begun Kane

At work, I’m surrounded by brains,
And it smarts cuz they love to take pains
To display all their smarts.
It seems even their farts
Have more know-how than MY brain contains.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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42 Responses to “Limerick Brains (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. Brian Allgar says:

    (I doubt if I’ll have time to write my usual quota this Sunday …)

    Today, I am using my brains
    Elsewhere than on rhymes and refrains,
    For although it’s not funny,
    The “day job” makes money,
    Which cannot be said of Mad Kane’s.

  2. I couldn’t find your Open Link Night poem here. Did you post the wrong link?

  3. Judith H. Block says:

    At work, I’m surrounded by brains,
    High levels of skill each attains.
    And it is well known
    That I hold my own
    We’re challenged, and no one complains.

  4. Judith H. Block says:

    A man who was more brawn than brains
    I reject, or so he complains.
    Though true to my heart,
    I like my guys smart!
    He once and for all ascertains.

  5. Judith H. Block says:

    A woman was racking her brains
    Allurement thoughts she entertains.
    Skillfully seduce him-
    To jelly, reduce him.
    Use sex without any constraints.

  6. brian miller says:

    a fellow who liked to eat brains
    (me) at holidays took great pains
    to obtain them fresh
    not that canned trash
    then scrambled them with eggs

  7. YT Cai says:

    Our Congress is full of lamebrains
    Except those going against grains
    The Patriot Act
    Is there to distract
    And to keep the squawkers in chains

    All countries go through growing pains
    When obstructionists are in passing lanes
    Regressives in charge
    With tax cuts so large
    The one percent can’t count their gains

    To grow there must be some hard rains
    As floodgates can’t handle the strains
    Something’s gotta give soon
    While Republicans swoon
    Their policies will derail more trains

    I’m tired and and now short on refrains
    It’s not too late to vote out our banes
    Growing tired of rants
    Disingenuous pants
    Excuse me while I go clean out my Hanes

  8. rbasler says:

    A zombie who eats people’s brains
    Makes sure they are not mixed with grains
    He may be undead
    But he still can’t eat bread
    A gluten-free guy he remains…

  9. John Armstrong says:

    Sliced and diced human brains
    Zombie pot Hunan chow meins
    In general promote
    Sounds from the throat
    That express severe hunger paeans

  10. Brian Allgar says:

    She sucks out his organs and brains
    Until only the carcass remains.
    The mate of the spider
    Is truly inside her,
    Converted to silk for her skeins.

  11. Zelick Mendelovich says:

    At work I’m surrouded by brains
    Red cabbage potatoes and grains
    I blend them real well
    Ding dong a big bell
    And make way for hungry great dames.
    (Not a spelling mistake)

  12. Phyllis L says:

    A scientist studying brains
    Found a virus with many new strains.
    She called it “mad poet” –
    If you have it, you’ll know it –
    You’ll write limericks till it pains!

  13. Daisy Mae Simon says:

    Two women who seemed to lack brains
    Underwent enlarged racks, despite pains
    To attract men’s ‘substantials’
    That is, large financials
    They walk abreast prowling for gains

  14. Tim James says:

    At work, I’m surrounded by brains.
    With an ardor that none of them feigns,
    They read Einstein and Bohr,
    Stephen Hawking and more,
    Whereas my speed is more Dick and Jane’s.

  15. Tim James says:

    A man who was more brawn than brains
    To “improve” his appearance took pains
    To remove all his hair
    As his weight he would pare.
    To sum up, then: he waxes and wanes.

  16. Byron Ives says:

    Great slumber requires few brains
    There’s no need to puff mary janes
    Get drowsy and placid
    With amino acid
    Just drink milk and eat Tryptophanes

  17. Jon Gearhart says:

    A man who is more brawn than brains
    Must convince teams that he still remains
    A back worth the price
    Of admission. Ray Rice
    Must show which smashmouth ways he retains.

  18. Jon Gearhart says:

    I’ve inebriated my brains
    With more than a couple champagnes
    If much more will be downed
    I’ll wind up in the ground
    As archaeologic remains

  19. Madeleine says:

    Some great entries here as always :O)

  20. Byron Ives says:

    A man who was more brawn than brains
    Repeatedly suffered bad sprains
    Doc said, “Ankle tissue
    Is really the issue.”
    His friends called him ‘Shit For Membranes’

  21. Jon Gearhart says:

    The world economical brains
    That agree with one John Maynard Keynes
    Think what each country needs
    Is a government that leads
    By taking the economy’s reins,

    But the way Friedrich Hayek explaint,
    The free market should have no constraint
    From political types
    Else there will be gripes.
    With jobs lost and inflation–how quaint!

  22. John Sardo says:

    A scientist studying brains
    Discovered several new strains.
    They were found in the Congress
    And without any fondness
    Said brains in the ass brought national pains.

  23. John Sardo says:

    A woman was racking her brains
    To learn where she got all those stains
    She wasn’t Veronica
    Oh, no she was Monica
    From this activity now she abstains.

  24. Konrad Schwoerke says:

    I get sick when I eat someone’s brains.
    Though I puke, all their knowledge remains.
    I make billions of dollars
    From munching on scholars;
    So what if they’re ill-gotten gains?

  25. Konrad Schwoerke says:

    Oops! That last one should have a question mark at the end of L5. Would you mind making that change, Mad? Thanks in advance.

    (Done.)

  26. Konrad Schwoerke says:

    A scientist studying brains
    Would dissect ’em and dye ’em with stains.
    “What I’ve learned through inspection
    Is framing each section
    Makes beautiful art,” he explains.

  27. Jon Gearhart says:

    It seems Santa’s got sex on the brains.
    Blood of freakiness flows through his veins.
    His high-flying reindeer
    He’ll approach from the rear
    In mid-flight and pull back on their reins.

  28. Indubitably he had brains,
    but without taking adequate pains
    his mind’s blade to hone,
    he merely made moan
    as the genius of others made gains.

  29. yt cai says:

    If buffaloes had bigger brains
    They wouldn’t have grazed on the plains
    More than a distinction
    Of their near extinction
    Victims with poor choice of terrains

  30. yt cai says:

    While looking into actor’s brains
    They’ll do whatever entertains
    Wrap in something shear
    Or to just disappear
    Seeing through the role of Claude Rains

  31. Allen Wilcox says:

    A scientist blew out his brains
    When experiments led to such gains
    That he learned how to mentor
    The limerick center,
    Causing deadly distresses and strains.

  32. Allen Wilcox says:

    A driver quite lacking in brains
    Disobeys all the rules he distanes.
    So to no one’s surprise,
    He, stubborn, unwise,
    Didn’t look as he tried to change lenes.

  33. I once was a guy with some brains
    who used them for personal gains,
    but when money’s boss
    we suffer a loss
    and moolah is all that remains.

  34. Craig says:

    I’ve been missin’ a gal who’s got brains
    ‘Cause her head’s filled with clever quatrains,
    Also lovely haiku
    Plus a lim’rick or two.
    Whose brains you say? Madeleine Kane’s!

  35. Lauren I. says:

    There once was a man who ate brains,
    ‘though it caused his tummy great pains.
    His butt forced a chirp,
    Nay the ol’ panty burp,
    But instead a skid mark in his Hanes.

  36. Fred Bortz says:

    In string theory, constructs called branes,
    Or multidimensional planes,
    Are to some “Grand Designs,”
    Although Fred Bortz maligns
    The way Stephen Hawking explains.

    See my review of Hawking’s The Grand Design, originally published in the Philadelphia Inquirer. I am not alone in my negative take on that book. (Grand Design)

  37. Ron B. says:

    Where I work I’m surrounded by brains
    who are puzzled that nothing explains
    why the smell in the air
    is from their derrière
    but…there’s nary a soul who complains.

  38. Byron Ives says:

    A man scrapes up deer hearts and brains,
    And livers and gizzards of cranes
    The vast interstate
    Stocks his dark dinner plate
    “Hey, parts is parts.” he maintains

  39. Ron B. says:

    Older women now racking their brains
    over sagging their aging explains
    should know what is shifting
    can still be uplifting
    to men sensing and feeling their pains.

  40. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun week of limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners: Limerick of the Week 192.

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Grand Limerick.

  41. Denise Carruthers says:

    At work, I’m surrounded by brains
    I dissect and study remains
    because I am dropsy
    when I do an autopsy
    my clothes are all covered in stains.

  42. Denise Carruthers says:

    A man who has more brawn than brains
    and fancies he’s the greatest of swains
    Spends all time at a mirror
    and in front of the camera
    So a muscly dumb bachelor remains