Overpriced Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A gal in an overpriced store…*

or

A man in an overpriced store…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Overpriced Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A gal in an overpriced store,
Who’d completely forgotten what for,
Told the clerk, “Can’t recall
Why I came here at all.
Just as well. If I could, I’d be poor.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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72 Responses to “Overpriced Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. brian miller says:

    a guy in an over priced store
    read the tag then passed out on the floor
    his wife swiped his card
    and charge, charge-charged
    as the paramedics came through the door

  2. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Declared she would shop there no more:
    I’ve spent quite enough
    On your ** crappy stuff!
    If you had your way, I’d be poor.

  3. Cara Holman says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Developed sticker shock, and what’s more
    When it came time to pay
    She cried out “No way!”
    So they escorted her right out the door.

  4. kaykuala says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Is a show off and just a bore
    Hopes to ensnare
    But gets nowhere
    Not getting what she hopes for

    Hank

  5. Jannpoet says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Was searching for bargains galore
    The price was horrendous
    For Lacy suspenders
    which caused her to run for the door

  6. Patrick McKeon says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    Had two arms which reached down to the floor
    “We get very few”
    Said the clerk “quite like you”
    “With these prices you won’t get much more”

  7. Craig says:

    So my gal loved this furniture store,
    She’d get off when we’d walk through the door.
    But one day on a dare
    We had sex in a chair
    Now we’re not allowed back any more.

  8. Mark Kane says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Had a plan as she strode thru the door.
    Find a man who is rich,
    And make him her bitch,
    Then shop as his over priced whore.

  9. Hansi says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Was really an expensive whore
    When offered a slice
    No one cared about price
    And they all kept coming back for more.

  10. Pat Hatt says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    Found it to be quite the bore
    All flashy and neat
    With not even a treat
    The most fun was the spinning door

  11. John Sardo says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Thought her wardrobe a maidenly bore
    She picked through the clothes
    Until poor hubby froze
    And fainted flat out on the floor.

    A man in an overpriced store
    Turned abruptly and went out the door
    He’d be finely accoutered
    But financially neutered
    And forced to a house of the poor.

  12. Linda Fuller says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    Was schizo and thought he was Thor,
    The Norse god of thunder.
    He started to plunder
    And ruined the boutique’s décor.

  13. Bruce Niedt says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    found herself a nice Christian Dior,
    but they thought her a lout,
    and said, kicking her out,
    “You pronounce it cou-TURE, not cou-TOR!”

  14. Diane Groothuis says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    Was seeking a musical score
    The man said with a leer
    “We don’t ave em ere
    We don’t even know what they’re for”.

  15. Bruce Niedt says:

    I was thinking of this movie when I wrote the previous limerick:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    was thought common and shown out the door.
    But she was more than a “ho”:
    Richard Gere was her beau,
    so she came back and gave them what-for.

  16. Diane Groothuis says:

    A girl in an overpriced store
    Coveted a frock that she saw
    It looked so fantastic
    She put it on plastic
    And when she got home hubby swore.

  17. Mark Kane says:

    A man in an overpriced store,
    Bought Jewelry he hoped she’d adore.
    Before their big fight,
    They had sex every night.
    It was this that he hoped to restore.

  18. daisy mae simon says:

    A gal in a posh clothing store
    Grabbed her guy, locked the dressing room door
    Security’s viewing
    Revealed they were screwing
    ‘Get a room’ means hotel, when called for!

  19. Linda Fuller says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    Found shopping an odious chore
    But he bought lots of jewelry
    Because such tomfoolery
    Wowed women and helped him to score.

  20. Fred says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Saw a dress she couldn’t ignore
    But when she showed the receipt to her dad
    He got so very mad
    And tore up her cards right there on the floor

  21. John Larkin says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    told his wife, “I can take it no more.
    The prices are too high.
    I’m saying goodbye.”
    And with that he ran out the door.

  22. Diane Groothuis says:

    A girl in an overpriced store
    Was really in search of l’amour
    She said “All you males
    Will never make sales
    Until you can say “Je t’adore” ‘

  23. Judy Roney says:

    This is a hoot and the truth of it all fits me perfectly. I love to shop but I’m not to good at remembering. :)

  24. Jesse Levy says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    just couldn’t steal anymore
    To make matters worse
    They looked in her purse
    So laden it dragged on the floor.

  25. Daniel Ari says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    said, “Show me some more, I implore.
    This past Mother’s Day
    I forgot. Now I’ll pay
    restitution by Christian Dior.”

  26. I can imagine her chagrin
    Confused as to why she’d come in
    To a pretentious boutique
    No intention to seek
    A thing from a place with no bargain bin

  27. Craig says:

    Saw this blonde at my old hardware store,
    Who was asked what’s she’s shopping there for
    “Well my roommate just said
    I must make my own bed,
    And I ran out of nails and need more.”

  28. Mama Zen says:

    That’s hilarious!

  29. Craig says:

    So this girl in an overpriced store
    Got no help from the staff on the floor.
    So she took off her clothes
    And stuck gum on her nose –
    After that, she was hard to ignore.

  30. Patti says:

    There was a man in an overpriced store
    Who really gave the poor clerk what for.
    He bellowed, “I drive across town,
    Watch my gas gauge crash down,
    And you have the gall to want more?”

  31. Craig says:

    There’s this terribly overpriced store
    That sells Redskins stuff – jerseys and more.
    You could spend some big bucks
    So it’s nice my team sucks,
    I’m not tempted to walk through the door.

  32. Linda Fuller says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Said “I’ve never been here before.
    The salesclerks are snobby
    And dumb as kohlrabi;
    I’m not coming here anymore.”

  33. Linda Fuller says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Was shopping for one petit four.
    The cost was excessive
    Which made her depressive
    And craving a sweet even more.

  34. Bobby Chandran says:

    I thought it was a regular store
    The Secret Service Agent Swore
    They offered goods plenty
    So I offered the gal a twenty
    Who knew she was a whore

  35. Bobby Chandran says:

    While at a local Walmart Store
    A huge guy did walk through the door
    Away from him you want to stay
    An inconvenient truth some would pray
    It was none other than Al Gore

  36. Sara V says:

    Doorway to Discounts

    A man in an overpriced store
    Thumped his fist and started to roar
    I won’t pay this amount!
    Where’s a better discount?
    And the clerk gladly showed him the door

  37. Veralynne says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Tried a dress on so tight that it tore
    Embarrassed to death
    She started on meth
    And pounds! Well, she lost ‘em galore!

  38. Veralynne says:

    A guy in an overpriced store
    Turned and ran right out the door!
    Were di’mond prices too high?
    Or was he just too shy
    To ask his gal for “forevermore”?

  39. Craig says:

    When he got his blue pills from the store,
    The doc said “Take one, and no more!”
    But he wanted his date 
    To be great – he took eight –
    Now he can’t get his dick through the door.

  40. Veralynne says:

    A guy in an overpriced store
    Found items on offer a bore
    ‘Til a salesgirl, so hot,
    Helped him tie a Windsor knot
    And joined him for lunch at the shore.

  41. Veralynne says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Caught a man’s eye (she was a whore)
    Slipping into a corner
    She let him adorn her
    With lingerie he would adore.

  42. Veralynne says:

    Have you been to the grocery store?
    It’s hard to find bargains anymore!
    If you want to be healthy,
    You’d better be wealthy.
    Or wear clothes with big pockets and score!

  43. Bobby Chandran says:

    Inspired by Craig Dykstra’s Limerick

    Blue pills I got from the store
    I took eight – no more
    With those Magical Viagra
    I can vault across the Niagara
    But my dick is bruised and sore

  44. Jamie Hutchinson says:

    The Prez bought an overpriced store
    Of supplies for the Middle East war.
    The dealers were sharks,
    The bombs missed their marks,
    And the Congress declared, “Buy some more!”

  45. Linda Fuller says:

    A gentleman entered a store
    Called “Dressers and Bureaus Galore.”
    Exorbitant prices!
    A chiffonier crisis!
    He couldn’t buy even one drawer.

  46. Diane Groothuis says:

    A girl in an overpriced store
    Got a terrible pain in the jaw
    And when she went to pay
    all she could say
    Was”Aw, aw aw aw, aw aw aw.”

  47. MrsSmeej says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Said, shocked to the depths of her core;
    “With prices so high
    “There should be a guy
    “To carry me in from the door.”

  48. Jenny Murray says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    said I will not shop in here no more!
    For in I did come
    And got groped on the bum
    and not one soul held open the door!

  49. Bone says:

    A guy in an overpriced store
    Was asked as he went for the door
    “Can you not find your size?”
    “No, I can’t find my price.”
    Do you have a section for the poor?

  50. Diane Groothuis says:

    Craig D in an overpriced store
    Took his 8 blue pills- no more
    They started to act
    And this is a fact
    He ran through that store in the raw.

  51. I know the feeling!

  52. Bobby Chandran says:

    Put your money in (JP) Morgan’s store
    You’d lose your pants and more
    These Barbarian’s at the gate
    Regulations they hate
    Your money is safe under the kitchen floor

  53. Johanna Richmond says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    Embarrassed his wife to the core:
    While the one percent stared,
    Indiscreetly he aired,
    “JC Penney’s got dresses galore!”

  54. Bobby Chandran says:

    With apologies to you know who!

    His claim – the pills from a drug store
    Got him stuck at the front door
    The tale of his huge erection
    He says – its all fiction
    Makes me laugh and roll on the floor

  55. Versebender says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    Was anxious to get out the door
    But his wife said, “Be nice
    And forget about price”
    If you’d like to avoid civil war”

  56. Diane Groothuis says:

    A guy in an overpriced store
    Had his left leg shot off in the war
    He was after one shoe
    She said “No you buy 2″
    So he lost it and called her a whore.

  57. Johanna Richmond says:

    Piped a man in an overpriced store,
    “You’ve a nerve calling this junk top-drawer!
    Not a ballsier scam
    Has the world witnessed, Ma’am,
    Since the end of the Greek-Trojan War.”

  58. Mark Kane says:

    A man in an overpriced store,
    A master of “Sleight of Hand” lore,
    Turned their diamonds to glass,
    With one simple pass,
    Thereby funding his home on the shore.

  59. Amydot says:

    A girl in an over-priced store,
    Wanted some shoes and some more,
    She saw the price and went pale,
    And head for the sale,
    But spent 3 grand or 4!

    Amydot

  60. A gal in an overpriced store
    Had a plan not to buy, but explore
    ‘Til she spotted a spout
    She could not live without
    Which she bought, then left broke out the door.

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Had a thought when she walked in the door;
    The plan she was cooking –
    While the clerk wasn’t looking
    Move the dec’mal point over two more.

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Said, “This place is the worst on the Shore.
    So, snob-shoppers see ya!
    I’m going to IKEA
    Where I can afford to buy more!”

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Somehow slipped on a spot on the floor.
    Her lawyer she dialed;
    A lawsuit he filed
    Which led to an overpriced score.

  61. Daniel Ari says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    had spent her whole budget and more.
    She asked with concern,
    “Do you take returns?”
    “Oui, oui. Please return to our store.”

  62. Mark Kane says:

    Here’s an “Alternate Ending” for one I wrote earlier today:

    A man in an overpriced store,
    A master of “Sleight of Hand” lore,
    Turned their diamonds to glass,
    With one simple pass,
    Now he’s selling their wares in HIS STORE.

  63. Diane Groothuis says:

    A man in an Overpriced store
    Sneaked out through the fire escape door
    His bag was well stuffed
    But they got him hand cuffed
    Grabbing him at the ground floor.

  64. Mark Megson says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Was street savvy and evened the score
    By swapping the tags
    Of designer and tote bags
    And left with arms full of Dior

    A man in an overpriced store
    Was caught while breaking the law
    Not a thing he shoplifted
    But an STD he regifted
    To an equally overpriced whore

  65. CpSingleton42 says:

    A girl in an overpriced store
    was too tired to shop any more
    She snuck under a shelf
    For some time to herself
    And noisily started to snore

  66. Mark Kane says:

    A man in an overpriced store,
    Decided to sell what he wore.
    Once down to his socks,
    He attracted a “Fox”
    To his open undressing room door.

  67. Mark Kane says:

    A gal in an overpriced store,
    Left open her dressing room door.
    As fellows peeked in,
    She offered them sin.
    Rent free, she was earning much more.

  68. Amydot says:

    A gal in an over priced store,
    With her wardrobe a bit of a bore,
    She wanted something unique,
    And a little bit chic,
    But bought a tracksuit made from velour.

    A gal in an overpriced store,
    Lived the life of royalty before,
    But to keep looking flash,
    Sold her toes for some cash,
    And now she’s a shoe size four.

    A gal in an over priced store,
    Was spending like never before,
    She thought it was grand,
    Til it got out of hand,
    And could afford any more!

  69. scott says:

    A man in an overpriced store,
    returned some used skivvies he’d wore.
    Said they pulled out his hair,
    and then showed them where.
    Now he can’t shop there no more.

  70. Sara McNulty says:

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Clicked her heels `cross the marbled floor
    Accosted by snooty
    Salesgirl–far from foodie–
    asked if she was in the wrong store.

    A guy in an overpriced store
    Was dressed head to toe in valor
    Told the price of black boots
    He responded with hoots
    Said, for that price they should dance out the door.

    A gal in an overpriced store
    Amid cashmere sweaters galore
    Bore some skeptical looks
    From men suited in Brooks
    Winning Lotto, she could buy the store.

    A guy in an overpriced store
    paled at the price tags he saw
    Unwilling to admit
    He had not a chit
    He proclaimed the quality poor.

  71. Terri Setje says:

    A man in an overpriced store
    Saw a selection of wines galore
    When the tasting was done
    He had red on his tongue
    Now he’s not tasting the wine anymore….

  72. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for your entertaining limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner, The Facebook Friends’ Choice Award Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners! Limerick of the Week 62.

    But don’t worry — you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Unpersuasive Limerick.