Limerick Ode To Clarence Thomas

Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas is under scrutiny these days for conflicts of interest related to the Koch Brothers, the Federalist Society, and the Citizens United case.

But today’s limerick and haiku will focus, instead, on the fact that Thomas hasn’t asked a single appellate hearing question in five years.

For the record, I did quite a bit of litigation work during my lawyering years. And believe me, his failure to speak throughout five years of hearings is peculiar and reflects very poorly on his judicial skills.

That brings me to my Clarence Thomas limerick:

Limerick Ode To Clarence Thomas
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I’m mindful that Thomas can talk,
But at queries for hearings he’ll balk.
He’s been silent for years–
Five in all. I’m all ears.
If he asks one sharp question, I’ll gawk.

And here’s my Clarence Thomas haiku:

The Sup Court’s Thomas–
Too ill-informed for queries?
Or just too lazy?

UPDATE: It’s been nearly two years since I wrote this limerick and haiku. So in fairness, I must announce that Justice Thomas has finally broken his silence.

Now mind you, he didn’t ask a sharp question … or, indeed, any question: He merely made a mildly amusing four-word (or so) remark about lawyers who went to Yale.

Still … it’s a start.

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7 Responses to “Limerick Ode To Clarence Thomas”

  1. Jesse Levy says:

    Thomas has nothing to say
    so tell me why does he stay
    on a court that’s Supreme?
    It must be a dream.
    (More like a nightmare, I’d say).

  2. Amanda Moore says:

    Loved them both but your wit really shines in the Limerick!

  3. madkane says:

    Thanks, Amanda! Nice limerick, Jesse!

  4. Mardix says:

    Strange isn’t it? Hard to know what he’s about.

  5. Bob Loblaw says:

    C. Thomas is seemingly mute,
    Keeps on proving himself a galoot,
    He is curious… not,
    Thinks that Kagan is hot,
    And will show her his Coke can to boot.


    C. Thomas is such a big lout,
    While in session won’t open his mout’,
    Though a Koch brothers’ tool,
    At least knows but a fool,
    Opens mouth and therefore removes doubt.

  6. Steve Nance says:

    Inquiring minds want to know
    Why inquiry is not his M.O.
    With his interests conflicted
    ‘Twould be a wound self-inflicted
    Any interest in cases to show.

    Bob: I was going to reference that quote from Lincoln, too, but you did it better. Like.

  7. madkane says:

    I enjoyed your limericks, Bob and Steve!