Limerick Pass (Limerick-Off Monday) Rhyme Word: Pass or Surpass

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow who’d just made a pass…*


A fellow was trying to pass…*


I purchased an annual pass…*


A woman had hoped to surpass…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Pass
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A stoner was trying to pass
Forged fifties to pay for a class.
He got caught and was jailed
And then tried to get bailed
With more fakes, so his ass is now grass.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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63 Responses to “Limerick Pass (Limerick-Off Monday) Rhyme Word: Pass or Surpass”

  1. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A woman hoped not to surpass
    The size of her best friend’s pert ass
    By toning her chassis;
    Her moans weren’t too classy.
    Misguided, she gained weight – alas.

  2. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Hi, Mad! :) I hope to be “back” more often in the future :)

  3. Fred Bortz says:

    The slogan is “This 2 shall pass.”
    For a product that some folks call crass.
    But those in the know
    Love its go-go-go-go,
    And cheer, “Metamucil’s first class.”

  4. Charley Simmons says:

    A curmudgeon made a crude pass
    At a cute and comely young lass
    He said “come with me honey
    I’ve plenty of money”
    But , she kicked his wrinkled old ass.

  5. Mark Kane says:

    A fellow was trying to pass
    A runner who’s ass was first class.
    But loving the view
    (She was fine, it is true)
    He paused as he feigned losing gas.

  6. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A guy who was eager to pass
    His fellow commuters en masse
    Was pulled over (surprise!)
    By a cop with “green” eyes
    For attempting to pass on the grass.

  7. Brian Allgar says:

    He crashed when attempting to pass
    A police car. Amid fragments of glass,
    He was tested for drugs.
    Said the sergeant with shrugs,
    “Sir, when driving, please keep off the grass.”

  8. Brian Allgar says:

    Her grades were too wretched to pass
    Till she started to sell off her ass-
    Ets. Her prof, an old lecher,
    Gave straight “A’s”, you betcha,
    And now she is top of the class.

    (Sorry about the hyphen, Madeleine!)

  9. Brian Allgar says:

    “Can anything really surpass
    A donkey for eating the grass?”
    Asked the farmer with pride.
    “No, it can’t be denied
    That my donkey’s a fine piece of ass.”

  10. Brian Allgar says:

    He had made an unfortunate pass
    At a girl who was quite upper-class.
    She explained to the schmuck
    “Well-bred ladies don’t fuck!”
    In a voice that could cut right through glass.

  11. Brian Allgar says:

    She refused his suggestion. “I pass!
    I am really not that kind of lass.
    Though you may think it odd of me,
    I find that sodomy
    Is simply a pain in the ass.”

  12. Brian Allgar says:

    He found himself in an impasse
    When he fancied a roll in the grass
    With a lovely young chick,
    But she felt a small prick –
    She’d been bitten by ants in the ass.

  13. Judith H Block says:

    A woman had hoped to surpass
    Contenders who rivaled en masse.
    They’re good at a pun,
    Their limericks are fun!
    She’d have to try harder, alas!

  14. Judith H Block says:

    A fellow who’d just made a pass
    Was called a stupendous jackass
    His method was crude,
    His actions were lewd.
    And all things about him were crass.

  15. Judith H Block says:

    A fellow had just made a pass
    At a young and most comely young lass.
    Singing, “You’ve got a friend..”
    She wished it would end.
    She thought his behavior was crass.

  16. Judith H Block says:

    A fellow had just made a pass
    But showed that he had no real class.
    She was no pushover
    And it was all over
    When he dared touch her on the ass.

  17. Judith H Block says:

    John Kerry thought he’d get a pass,
    The French thought his actions were crass
    James sang, “You’ve got a friend”
    Will this farce never end?
    Je pense que vous etes un jackass.

  18. Jon Gearhart says:

    Some guys like big butts while some pass.
    I guess I’m in that latter class.
    I like all the brooders
    With really large hooters,
    But don’t complicate things with morass.

  19. Jon Gearhart says:

    In the game of life, when go you pass
    You don’t get two hundred, just sass.
    That plus fifty cents
    Posts a letter that hence
    After states you can just kiss my ass.

  20. Judith H Block says:

    The US is stuck in a morass
    The French think our actions were crass.
    It was a faux pas
    “You’ve got a friend!” Nah!
    But luckily this too shall pass.

  21. Jon Gearhart says:

    When handing out brains, they would pass
    Right by you, and so now, alas,
    Only clue that you’ve got
    Was when you went and bought
    The board game, you big stupid ass.

  22. scott says:

    A man made an unfruitful pass
    at a gal in his Calculus class
    and now he knows why
    when you’re solving for pie
    you don’t want to mention her mass

  23. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    The young guard said, Sir, you may pass.
    In a move meant to shame and harass
    He grinned, Honey, your zits
    Are as big as your tits.
    Sir, you’re smaller than either (you ass…)

    And later with friends at the bar
    She proceeded to “feather and tar”:
    My whole person’s off limits
    Even if he were Nimitz!
    In fact, I hope this guy goes far.

  24. Jen Harris says:

    A dude, while attempting a pass
    Chose complimenting her ass
    Ignoring her eyes,
    Which were glaring goodbyes
    ‘Scuse me – I’m no anal lass!

  25. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    I purchased an annual pass
    To an out-of-state Fest o’ the Grass.
    Thought, the wearin’ o’ the green,
    Music, beer, Irish scene;
    But saw mellow, tuned-out folks en masse.

  26. Tim James says:

    For Mark Kane:

    On a run, I’ve attempted to pass
    Some young gal with a cute little ass.
    If her butt’s slim, it’s true,
    So’s the rest of her too;
    So I’ve no chance to catch her, alas.

  27. Susan says:

    On our trek up Serenity pass,
    We discovered we needed a pass.
    Would a thousand apiece
    Help us find inner peace?
    Empty pockets said, “Give it a pass.”

  28. Laura M says:

    Once I purchased an annual pass –
    all the days of the year en masse –
    except i misread it
    thinking instead it
    was an all-access pass for some ass

  29. Charley Simmons says:

    Wilson threw an overtime pass.
    Kearse caught it and lit on his ass.
    Now because of that goal,
    They’ll go to the Bowl,
    The heroes of media mass.

  30. Charley Simmons says:

    The Donners were trapped on the pass,
    When blizzards of snow did amass.
    Some drank and ate hearty,
    Of the rest of the party,
    Saying, “come Spring all this will pass”.

  31. Ron B. says:

    Guaging Aging

    Said a gal who still sought to surpass
    the reflection she saw in the glass,
    “It’s not gone, my “allure”
    is just getting mature —
    and, with toning, becoming my “class”.

  32. Ron B. says:

    Passing Blame

    Thought a fellow whose gas had to pass
    I can do this without being crass
    if I silently leak,
    and if asked at its peak,
    deny blame with equivalent class.

  33. Ron B. says:

    Pass Play

    The true art of a good, forward pass
    calls for touching quite lightly with class
    and then calling the bluff
    of her gentle rebuff
    that means, “yes, but be kind and not crass.”

  34. Ron B. says:

    In “Guaging Aging” above, please, at line 1, insert “still” between “who” and “sought”. Thanks.

    (Done — MBK)

  35. Jon Gearhart says:

    For my birthday, my son bought a pass
    To go fishing. They stock them en masse.
    They’ll replaice what you like.
    We caught waleye, carp, pike,
    But they cut us off, right at the bass.

  36. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A guy who was failing to pass
    His physics (semester one) class
    On tests was a lightweight.
    His answer sealed his fate:
    E = mc squared [say Mass].

  37. Ron B. says:

    Taken For A Ride

    Having purchased an annual pass
    to a park I had heard was a gas,
    a year later I found
    having tested the ground
    what I played on was Radon…not grass.

  38. Matt Regan says:

    A physicist struggled to pass
    A kidney stone so huge and vast
    That his doctor soon fainted.
    Then the nurse was acquainted
    With the relative nature of mass.

  39. Konrad Schwoerke says:

    A fellow who made a lewd pass
    Has confirmed for his wife he’s an ass,
    And a two-timing prick,
    So she severs his dick—
    Now it lies, like a snake, in the grass.

  40. Twisted

    A woman hoped to surpass
    A fellow’s former young lass
    Her legs she did send
    Round her head they did bend
    Which gave him a good view of her ass

  41. Jon Gearhart says:

    When a quarterback drops back to pass,
    The refs need a spy on his ass
    To make sure that his balls
    Are the right size. If all’s
    Not the same, they’ve been letting off gas!

    Deflated Footballs

  42. Jon Gearhart says:

    Though you said we could date, I must pass.
    You thought that I’d go, but, alas,
    You thought my words good
    But you misunderstood
    When I called you a world class ass.

  43. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    [Riffing off Jon G’s non-date :)]

    Metal, Not Mettle

    She answered, No raincheck, I’ll pass!
    And stress that your offer lacks class:
    A meal, show, then *uck?
    I fear you’re out of luck,
    But will grant that your balls are pure brass.

  44. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Mad, argh! I meant to say “balls” plural ~ ha!

    (Fixed — MBK)

  45. Diane Groothuis says:

    I usually try to surpass
    Other poets quite out of my class.
    And young Edward Lear
    Would cry in his beer
    At my lim’ricks both feeble and crass.

  46. Konrad Schwoerke says:

    If it’s Lear, then I think I will pass;
    He was naught but a silly old ass.
    His nonsensical tripe
    Gets unwarranted hype;
    If it’s Lear, then I think I will pass.

  47. Diane Groothuis says:

    I purchased an annual pass,
    To a rock concert show on the grass
    But I had a few itches
    Under my britches
    As the ants and the bugs bit my ass.

  48. Allen Wilcox says:

    A fellow was trying to pass
    A lass who was swinging her ass
    Side to side (super-sized).
    He was quite hipnotized,
    And his privates went public en masse.

  49. Allen Wilcox says:

    A lad, having just made a pass
    At a woman, heard this,”Don’t Harass.
    You’re too backward,
    Grow up if you can.”
    He, surprised, cried “A lack and a lass!”

  50. Allen Wilcox says:

    They each asked the full prof for a pass.
    In exchange, even offered him grass.
    Said he, “I’ll not bow
    To skullduggery. Now
    I must leave. I’m the one who has class.”

  51. Allen Wilcox says:

    Echos of current events are purely intentional.

    The coach watched his quarterback pass
    And thought to himself, “What an ass!
    Can’t rely on bad calls,
    So I’ll deflate his balls,
    And, if caught, blame it all on thr brass.”

  52. Thomas Gorman says:

    A man had hoped to surpass
    His efforts in convincing his ass
    But when his donkey did balk
    He was left with his cock
    And his hen had terrible gas!

  53. Unmentionables In Passing

    The short meet quickly came to impasse
    As my ex- charged I only harass;
    Though her bank accounts shrunk
    ‘Cause her earning skills stunk,
    She did not like the term “working-class.”

  54. Kirk Miller says:

    On Sundays, some people would pass
    The donkey when walking to mass.
    When the donkey would bray,
    All the people would say,
    “That donkey is quite a bad ass.”

  55. Kirk Miller says:

    A young nympho made many a pass
    (she’s a gal who most guys thought was crass)
    At the men. ‘Twas a sin,
    So she found herself in
    A morass ’cause she wanted more ass.

  56. Kirk Miller says:

    U.S. soldier lived long, did surpass
    Life expectancy; breathed mustard gas
    And some pepper spray, so
    I suppose that you know
    Man’s a seasoned veteran, alas.

  57. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Arizona (Etc.) Blues

    The bills that Obama would pass
    Were tied up in Congress: impasse :(
    It’s no big surprise;
    We despise all their lies.
    Congressperson? More likely, “tight” ass

    To whom all those called middle-class
    Are fair game to ignore or harass.
    If you’re not super wealthy,
    You’d better be healthy!
    Vote for most’s re-election?! I’ll pass…

    And as for that cretin, Jeff Flake,
    Re-election was one huge mistake.
    “I lied”; “That’s a joke!”
    More damn mirrors and smoke.
    How much more guff will citizens take?

  58. A fellow was making a pass
    to a lady he called “comely lass.”
    The lady took stock
    of his word choice and mocked!
    So he shortened his woo to “nice ass.”

  59. Kagen Aurencz Zethmayr says:

    A gardener once made a pass
    at a deviant sort of a lass.
    Although he seemed square,
    he scored on a dare
    by nakedly mowing her grass.

  60. A women was making a pass
    to a man while keeping some class.
    Her tactic was quiet
    but turned into riot
    when he replied with unprintable crass.

  61. Ron B. says:

    Maid of Ice

    Her stare was so cold as you’d pass
    you’d swear she was glacially crass
    but you had to admire
    the warm fire she’d inspire
    with her stunning thoracic crevasse.

  62. P Diane Schneider says:

    A codger was making a pass
    With a line while fishing for bass
    And hoping to charm
    A lass with his farm
    But all that he got was her sass.

  63. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun week of limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners: Limerick of the Week 199.

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Clapping For Limericks.