Limerick Rays — 2nd Anniversary Edition (Limerick-Off Monday)

A few minutes ago, I announced the 104th Limerick of the Week. And that means it’s anniversary time at Mad Kane’s Limerick-Offs.

The Limerick of the Week Awards started as an experiment nearly two years ago in March 2011. Of course, I had been informally posting limerick prompts for years before that. But it was on March 13, 2011 that I decided to get organized and start picking weekly winners. Here’s what I wrote.

But I’m trying something a bit different this time: One of your limericks will be anointed Limerick Of The Week.

As you can see, my experiment took, and next week I’ll be awarding the first Limerick of the Week for Year 3. So congratulations to all of you and thanks so much for helping to make this limerick competition such a success.

Oh … and in case you’re wondering who our first Limerick of the Week Winner was, it was our very own Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith. You can read her clever winning limerick here, along with delightful Honorable Mention limericks from David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose, Versebender, and co-writers (not to mention married couple) Catherine Palmer and Ron Mardix.

In light of our 2nd Limerick of the Week Anniversary, I’m offering you an alternative: In addition to your regular challenge, you may write a limerick related to any kind of anniversary, using any first line. Next week I’ll present an extra award — one for the best anniversary-related limerick.

And now, getting back to the business at hand, it’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow who wanted a raise…*

or

A woman who wanted a raise…*

or

A fellow was catching some rays…*

or

A woman was catching some rays…*

(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Rays
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man had been catching some rays,
Lazing lakeside — he’d done it for days,
While his wife hid inside:
“Sun is bad for your hide,
And besides, wasted time never pays.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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108 Responses to “Limerick Rays — 2nd Anniversary Edition (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. Craig says:

    Congratulations, Madeleine, on two full years of erudite silliness. It looks like an anniversary for me as well, as I first jumped into the pool at Week 52.

  2. Here’s to you Mad, our glasses we raise
    For the work that you do, we give praise
    It’s not Hegel or Kanty
    But very gallanty
    Your kind are too scanty these days!

  3. madkane says:

    Thanks so much, Craig and Steve, for your kind words and your delightfully entertaining contributions to my Limerick-Offs!

  4. Jannpoet says:

    A woman who wanted a raise
    Was working all nights and most days
    She needed a rest,
    Work was stealing her zest
    And turning her brown hair to greys.

  5. Bob Dvorak says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    Worked long nights and still longer long days.
    ‘Til his boss, late one night,
    Said, “Your wish I’ll requite.”
    Then she added, “Let’s find other ways.”

  6. Bob Dvorak says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    Asked his wife to resolve his malaise:
    “Sounding rather half-assed,
    My flag’s stuck at half mast.”
    She replied, “I can count a few ways.”

  7. Claudia says:

    oh she should have gone and joined him… lazy time spent together is never wasted time…smiles

  8. yt cai says:

    A fat steer who wanted a raise
    Refused to continue his graze
    without a pay hike
    he threatened to strike
    Management thus settled with braise

  9. yt cai says:

    A wan woman was copping some rays
    On low cape between a pair of bays
    in the high tide ambled
    as sunbather scrambled
    She and her top went their separate ways

  10. yt cai says:

    A poor escort was seeking a raise
    From his madame who exploited gays
    she met his demands
    without reprimands
    Now he gets much more out of his lays

  11. yt cai says:

    A chef who was seeking a raise
    Perfected his Chicken Francaise
    unless more pay began
    he would strike with his pan
    Causing his boss’s eyes to deglaze

  12. Eugene Fedorov says:

    A gal who was catching some rays
    Provoked boy’s short arm to some raise.
    But it fell down flat
    Once she noticed that
    And said: “Je voudrais que tu m’baises!”

  13. John Sardo says:

    A woman was catching some rays
    On days when the sun was ablaze
    She turned a bright red
    Couldn’t lie down in bed.
    Poor hubby was left with his raise.

  14. John Sardo says:

    A fellow was catching some rays
    Spied a gal who gave him a gaze.
    He said babe you look fine
    I’ll buy dinner and wine.
    Then later in bed she’d amaze.

  15. Craig says:

    A farmer was trying to raise
    The volume of what his hen lays
    He read via Twitter
    To feed the gal glitter
    Now the poor thing just lays Fabergés!

  16. Craig says:

    Her candidacy failed to raise
    Any money – she ran out in days –
    Turns out it’s essential
    To look presidential
    But not if it’s Rutherford Hayes.

  17. Gary Hallock says:

    An overboard fan of Blu-Rays
    Can blow lots of money these days
    I bought a whole box
    Of that film with J. Foxx
    Who sang blues in some ways that amaze

  18. Hansi says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    Found out that crime never pays
    He stole from his boss
    Who noticed the loss
    And is incarcerated for the rest of his days.

  19. Green Speck says:

    Our fellow Jack who wanted a raise
    Showered his boss with lavish praise
    However, on D-day
    Julie got the greater pay
    Sorry Jack, you missed her strategic gaze.

  20. Mark Kane says:

    He walked in demanding a raise.
    She offered instead her soft chaise.
    Taking matters in hand,
    She did more than he’d planned.
    Let’s just say that she cured his malaise.

  21. Pat Hatt says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    Gave his boss a birthday gaze
    She was really a he
    Not liking all being set free
    Now he knows stripping never always pays

  22. Congratulations on the 2nd Anniversary, Madelaine.
    Here’s my contribution to the celebration (it’s nice to be back after a month away). —K

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    proceeded his new boss to praise
    but his boot-licking
    earned him butt-kicking
    when his real work was appraised.

  23. Bjorn says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    tried hard his boss to amaze
    He brought her a rose
    what did he suppose?
    get paid for set her fire ablaze

  24. Craig says:

    A woman from Rye, trynna raise
    Her spouse from his bedroom malaise,
    Left her clothes on the shelf
    And just covered herself
    With some ham, and a little mayonnaise.

  25. Craig says:

    A comedian, onstage at Ray’s,
    Told the secret of how his act plays –
    “I’m goofy, I’m wise,
    And look straight in their eyes”
    Ham on wry, with a little man gaze.

  26. Mark Kane says:

    Poor Wilbur stepped out for some rays,
    But soon found the price that one pays,
    For playing with fire,
    To ease one’s desire.
    He soon lacked the means or the ways.

  27. rbasler says:

    Donald Trump said he wanted to raze
    A hotel from New York’s glory days
    “Let’s just rocket The Plaza
    “Like a shanty in Gaza -
    “It isn’t where anyone stays!”

  28. Andy Sewina says:

    Congratulations Mad!
    A fellow was catching some rays
    and he said ‘La France est un pays’
    He sat on La plage
    for free without charge
    and dreamt about the good old days.

  29. kaykuala says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    Was very liberal with his praise
    Couldn’t get through
    To those who knew
    But it didn’t bother him the least

    Hank

  30. Eugene Fedorov says:

    A gambler who wanted to raise
    Has won some good cash on green baize
    But never been given
    On sheet of white linen
    A prize that he would most appraise.

  31. Tom Harris says:

    A man was catching some rays
    From a planet far, far aways,
    Where little green men
    Turned big dials, which then
    Morphed his lame brain to mayonnaise.

  32. Global warming’s predicted to raise
    The oceans, the seas and the bays
    We’ll build houses on stilts
    And we’ll hitch up our kilts
    As our bums burn in summer’s cruel blaze

  33. Jamie Hutchinson says:

    happy anniversary mad!

  34. Jamie Hutchinson says:

    A history buff always would raise
    A few eyebrows along with much praise:
    Of events small or great
    There was only one date
    That he couldn’t deliver: today’s.

  35. A fellow who wanted a raise
    had been colorblind most of his days.
    So instead of the blue pill
    he took Metamucil,
    and his “piece of ass” came ‘nuther ways.

  36. A writer who wanted a raise
    wrote some sexy and steamy screenplays.
    The producer got hot,
    then he gave her a shot.
    Not with cash but in sexual ways.

  37. Tom Harris says:

    A chubby lass often caught rays
    At the beach on warm summer days.
    And in her bikini –
    One really quite teeny –
    She prayed she’d draw a lustful gaze.

  38. Edmund Conti says:

    In June we will have reached fifty
    In married years–nice, neat and nifty.
    Oh yes, we are old
    So guess what, it’s gold
    Or pewter for givers more thrifty.

  39. Edmund Conti says:

    A fellow was catching some Rays
    Well, maybe it’s time to re-phrase.
    The team’s Tampa Bay
    The boys want to play
    The pitchers are hoping for praise.

  40. A woman who wanted a raise
    Made her case with some weak-kneed cliches.
    Her boss, unimpressed,
    Denied her request.
    And now she works all holidays.

  41. scott says:

    Two years already??

    Happy Anniversary MADam!

    My how rhyme flies!!

  42. Nessa says:

    a woman was looking to raise
    her man’s libido to a blaze
    her boobs went up
    the rest got a tuck
    and her body of work got her praise

  43. Nessa says:

    Congratulations on your anniversary!

  44. William Preston says:

    DATE NIGHT

    Once too many a past anniversary
    we have tended to tots in the nursery.
    But tonight we will not;
    we will spend time, a lot,
    in the bedroom, and won’t make it cursory.

  45. William Preston says:

    JEALOUSY

    Francis Bacon once wanted to raze
    the old Globe, where they played Shakespeare’s plays,
    for he thought the old Bard
    just a great tub of lard
    and his sonnets but merely a phase.

  46. William Preston says:

    SYNCHRONICITY

    A woman who wanted a raise
    saw a man quite deserving of praise;
    when he caught her wide eyes,
    she looked on in surprise
    as he rose, quite in phase with her gaze.

  47. Craig says:

    Bruce Wayne gave up trying to raise
    Young Dick Grayson, who’d run off for days
    He’d turn up at the edges
    Of ornate floral hedges:
    The ward lurks in wisteria’s maze.

  48. Jamie Hutchinson says:

    As the bathers turn cheeks to the rays
    At the seaside resorts where they laze,
    Those sunshiny beams
    And temperate streams
    Kiss the jet set—astride their bidets.

  49. Sue Dulley says:

    Neither pencil nor pen can I raise
    Each day is like One Of Those Days
    The lim’ricks won’t come
    So I’m feeling quite dumb
    And hoping it’s only a phase.

  50. Tim James says:

    A gal who was catching some rays
    Doffed her pants and lay prone on her chaise.
    She displayed herself vainly
    So we have to speak plainly:
    She moons. (It may just be a phase.)

  51. Sue Dulley says:

    It’s already six, and the rays
    Of the sun still stream down through the haze.
    Spring Forward is great
    When you like to sleep late
    And anticip..ate long summer days.

  52. John Larkin says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    showed the boss five letters of praise.
    When the boss quickly said, “No can do;
    those notes were all written by you,”
    the worker went out in a blaze.

  53. Tari says:

    A fellow was catching some rays
    Smoking pot with his friends, like most days 
    Such kind words were evoked
    Every time his pals toked
    Made the man simply crave their high praise

  54. Jim Gallagher says:

    We’ve been dating for almost a year
    And commitment is something I fear
    Although it’s a cursory
    First anniversary
    I manned up and I bought you a beer

  55. A fellow was catching some rays
    On the very hottest of days
    It was a sizzling June
    He fell asleep at high noon
    And now he looks like a lobster that’s braised

  56. Edmund Conti says:

    You’ve been married last year, so I see
    Wedded bliss for a year, joy and glee
    But there in the nursery
    On your first anniversary
    Is an infant who is two, maybe three.

  57. Sue Dulley says:

    If ever I wanted to raise
    My girth or the need to wear stays
    Id eat lots of pies and
    fried fish with French fries and
    Spaghetti with sauce Bolognese.

  58. Sue Dulley says:

    A pianist, spirits to raise,
    Gets on the piano and plays
    A Chopin prelude,
    A waltz, an etude,
    And lastly a Grande Polonaise.

  59. A woman who asked for a raise
    After twenty-six years and three days
    Has a terrible feeling
    That ACME GLASS CEILING
    Won’t change the amount that it pays.

  60. Sue Dulley says:

    A fellow who’ll normally raise
    A glass on most festival days
    Says that he draws the line
    At green Guinness and wine
    But green beer on St Pat’s he okays.

  61. Sue Dulley says:

    A “neigh”-bour of mine likes to raise
    His voice in some animal ways:
    “Woof-woof” or ‘Meeow”
    Or he moos like a cow
    Or makes like a donkey and brays.

  62. “A fellow was catching some rays…”
    Wrote the lim’ricist, hoping for praise;
    Then decorum he broke
    With a Steve Irwin joke…
    (“Oh, Crikey!”, I think, is the phrase).

    (Said I to the editor, “Listen,
    It’s fine if you moderate this-un.
    It’s tasteless and crass,
    So I won’t be an ass
    And complain if this verse should go missin’.)

  63. A young man was catching some rays
    Without sunscreen. Gone mad from the blaze,
    he smeared honey instead
    from his toes to his head…
    Now he’s cooked to a delicate glaze.

  64. A worker who asks for a raise
    In the corporate jungle these days
    Has about as much hope
    As the average dope
    In the bleakest of Sam Beckett’s plays.

  65. Jamie Hutchinson says:

    May our marriage through profit and loss,
    Our blessing, more often our cross,
    Be forever enshrined
    In this lustrous and kind
    Anniversary plaque from the boss.

  66. Jamie Hutchinson says:

    On the web site, the wine bends the rays
    Into rainbows through glass, winning praise
    From critics who spout:
    “While it may taste like trout,
    It’s the best liquid crystal displays.”

  67. Sue Dulley says:

    My veggie consumption to raise
    I sometimes eat out at buffets.
    There’s red meat of course
    Which I hope isn’t horse
    But I’m there for the greens and the graze.

  68. (out-of-competition #1)

    An aspiring young actress (a hot one)
    Wished to be a big star… but was not one.
    So she went to make porn, in
    The suit she was born in –
    She wanted a raise; she sure got one!

  69. (out-of-competition #2)

    On the beach my friend Ray has been lazin’,
    And what’s happened is truly amazin’:
    After seven straight days
    Of absorbing the rays,
    Ray’s no longer a Ray — he’s a Raisin!

  70. (out-of-competition #3)

    As a child growing up on the coast,
    I used SPF 10 at the most.
    These days at the shore,
    Use 300 or more;
    If you don’t, just use butter. You’re toast.

  71. A fellow out catching the rays
    Gave up and resorted to sprays.
    From here it gets bleaker:
    They made him House Speaker,
    And the rest of this limerick has been suspended due to sequestration.

  72. Oh, Sue? when you go to buffets,
    The meat that you see in the trays
    Doesn’t come from a horse.
    There’s a much cheaper source:
    It’s employees who asked for a raise!

  73. Sue Dulley says:

    Will T, are you trying to raise
    My hopes when I go to buffets?
    Not sure if I’d rather
    not-eat someone’s father
    or not-eat a beastie who neighs.

  74. I hate to be telling you, Sue,
    But there’s really not much we can do.
    What I read in the news
    Scares me out of my shoes –
    And I’m scared of the vegetables, too!

    (Though now I’m worked up in a lather
    From racking my brains, just to gather
    If it’s fathers and brothers,
    Or horses and others
    I’d rather not rather not-rather.)

  75. Fat Hugh was out catching a ray,
    When suddenly, to his dismay,
    A crowd formed, demanding
    Marine Mammal Stranding
    Come push him back into the bay.

    “Please stop,” shouted Hugh; “It’s insanity,
    And a terrible blow to my vanity!
    I’m a person like you,
    Not a dugong!” cried Hugh…
    Sobbed an onlooker: “Oh, the Hugh Manatee!”

    (OK, this one’s kind-of mean. Sorry; I couldn’t pass up the pun.)

  76. Jamie Hutchinson says:

    A officer trying to raise
    A mounted division assays
    A monocular bronc.
    In the words of his wonk:
    “It fails with one eye and ten neighs.”

  77. Sue Dulley says:

    Will T., if on Facebook you’d post
    All your lim’ricks like “..butter. You’re toast”
    And others like those (ya
    deserve more exposure)
    We’d find out who Likes you the most.

  78. Sue Dulley says:

    I flinch when I see Rachael Ray’s
    ads in print or on Facebook these days.
    The biblical Rachel
    Is R-A-C-H-el
    But Rachael (Ms Ray) has two A’s.

  79. Well done, Sue!

    (It’s Paula Deen scares me instead –
    They’re always airbrushing her head!
    Some Photoshop fool
    Makes her look like a ghoul
    From a horror film: Deen of the Dead!)

  80. (RE: SD, 12:07)

    That’s kind of you, Sue — many thanks;
    But I fear I belong in the ranks
    Of the Facebook-impaired,
    For I’m terribly scared
    It’s a tool of Big Business and banks.

    There may be a book for my face,
    But Facebook just isn’t the place.
    My political view
    And my language (both blue)
    Might be bad for employers to trace…

    And I hope I don’t jangle your nerves
    About food that the restaurant serves;
    It’s better, I find,
    For my own peace of mind
    If I simply avoid the horse d’oeuvres.

    (There’s a Chinese buffet with an error
    on its signage that’s truly a scarer:
    Seems they mis-spelled “Hunan”
    With an “m”. Man, oh man,
    How the customers scattered in terror!)

  81. gs batty says:

    a man was catching some rays

    when a girl caught his gaze

    he said with a sigh

    on my oh my

    how I wish she would stand there for days.

    ////////

    a man was asking for a raise

    but his boss had noted the glaze of his gaze

    and said with a smirk

    I’ve not seen any work

    from you for days

  82. OK, one more and I promise I’ll shut up:

    ANNIVERSARY PRESENT
    – or –
    “Love means never having to say… Iamb Sorry”

    This year, I went to write my love a Sonnet –
    A present for our Anniversary.
    But when I’d worked a little while upon it,
    That anapest tread
    Reared its terrible head,
    And it quickly turned dirty, doggone it!

  83. Mark Kane says:

    Take One:

    He dreamed all his life of Sting Rays.
    Those Corvettes would set him ablaze.
    How he longed to own one,
    With it’s requiste fun,
    The roof down, just catching some rays.

  84. Mark Kane says:

    Take Two:

    He dreamed all his life of Sting Rays.
    Those Corvettes would set him ablaze.
    How he longed to own one,
    With it’s requisite fun;
    Till he entered his minivan phase.

  85. Sue Dulley says:

    … A Brutal anniversary tomorrow …

    “Beware around March the XV”
    Was the warning to Julius C.
    He died on that day
    Crying “Et tu, Brute”
    Back in XLIV BCE.

  86. Sue Dulley says:

    Will T., just one short final note:
    If a few others liked what you wrote,
    In the race for “Liked Best”
    You’d be leading the rest;
    At least you have my virtual vote.

  87. I am referring to the scientific journal “Science”, which actually had an article indicating this.

    Physiologists wanting to raise
    Scientific thoughts (such are their ways)
    Found according to “Science”
    Where I place my reliance,
    We’re just flasks in which microbes can graze.

  88. Tim James says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    Used the following threatening phrase:
    “My worth’s not in doubt;
    Move me up or I’m out!”
    Now ‘gainst working in Nome he inveighs.

  89. Carolyn Henly says:

    A Dutch cook awaiting a raise
    Tried to smother his boss with false praise.
    Said he: “You’re a good egg!”
    “Oh, to differ I beg!”
    Ben’s edict: “No free Holland days!”

  90. A worker who wanted a raise
    was tired of his boss’s cheap ways,
    so he sold tools from the shop…
    to an undercover cop,
    proving once again crime never pays!

  91. Mark Kane says:

    Remember, we’d grab us some rays,
    Digging Hendrix’s deep Purple Haze,
    Sipping glass after glass,
    While high on the grass,
    Young and happy, yes those were the daze.

  92. Sue Dulley says:

    On a subject I happened to raise
    In an earlier lim’rick (buffets):
    After lettuce for lunch
    I’ll binge on a bunch
    Of cheesecakes and (yum!) creme brulees.

    And thanks, Jane, for first mentioning ‘buffets’ which inspired me a few times this week.

  93. Johanna Richmond says:

    Happy Anniversary

    Well, it’s magical: one hundred four –
    2 times fifty-two, four and five score!
    As for me, I keep time
    Working lim’rick-off rhyme
    After rhyme till I can’t rhyme no more.

    And that brings me to my presentation:
    Though I happened here sans invitation,
    ‘Twas like finding a home
    Where the funny folk roam
    When the funny farm goes on vacation.

    I spent years, Mad, before you, in truth,
    Sitting ‘round, growing long in the tooth.
    So I thank you, Ms. Kane,
    For, through you, once again,
    I’m the fun-loving me of my youth!

  94. Carolyn Henly says:

    Ode to Spring Training

    A fellow who wanted to raise
    The crowd to its feet between plays
    Hollered: “Come on, you guys,
    Lift your hands toward the skies
    And shout out those Y-M-C-A’s!”

  95. Dr. Goose says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    Was rebuffed by his boss Mr. Hayes,
    Who said: “I advise
    That serving up fries
    Is not a profession that pays.”

  96. Dr. Goose says:

    When a guy asked his boss: “Where’s my raise?”
    She asked to excuse the delays,
    As taxes preclude ‘er
    To move from Bermuda
    The cash for employee outlays.

  97. Dr. Goose says:

    An actress demanded a raise
    To do one of Will Shakespeare’s plays.
    “The lady, as such,
    Doth protest too much,”
    Said Will, “To repurpose my phrase.”

  98. Dr. Goose says:

    On the phone she demanded a raise,
    And her words set the wire ablaze.
    “No agents are free,”
    Said a voice, adding she
    Must call back in the next business days.

  99. Dr. Goose says:

    Said the boss: “So you wanted a raise?
    Your naïveté, sir, does amaze!
    You’ve clearly not heard
    That your comp is deferred
    Into company 401(k)s.”

  100. Dr. Goose says:

    HR said: “We can’t give a raise,
    But please don’t allow this to faze.
    For those who perform,
    It’s now the new norm
    To hand out citations and praise.”

  101. Jamie Hutchinson says:

    Anniversary cheers to Mad Kane!
    Anniversary cheers to Mad Kane!
    I’m glad this is fun
    ‘Cause I’ve only Begun!
    Anniversary cheers to Mad Kane! …

  102. Karen Wickersham says:

    San Diego teachers wanted a raise
    Despite neswpaper’s bashing, we’re amazed
    With class sizes increased,
    And resources decreased
    Finally get one, after 10 years’ delays!

    (For more info, check the San Diego Union-tribune archives, they’re a real piece of work).

  103. (Following Jamie’s lead:)

    Since I’m new here, I hope you’ll explain
    The puzzle that’s straining my brain:
    Tell me, how is it one
    Can begin as Begun?
    (Begun, like as not,
    Long before you’re begot?)
    Why, it must drive her Mad… (Begun Kane).

    Still…

    Together, our voices we blend
    For humorous verse’s best friend:
    The fun that we’ve had
    Has been thoroughly Mad…
    May what Mad Kane’s Begun never end!

  104. nelderini says:

    A fellow who wanted a raise
    Scanned the want ads in kind of a daze
    He moaned with a sob
    “I could find a new job
    Just not one that actually pays!”

  105. Don Fitzpatrick says:

    Congratulations Madeleine on your Anniversary:

    This year 60 yrs did pass
    Since marrying a beautiful lass
    And although still together
    There’s been much stormy weather
    And at times just a pain in the ass

  106. A fellow who wanted a raise
    was screwed with what government pays.
    He sat on stacks of old news
    and put lifts on his shoes,
    the best raise he could hope for these days.

  107. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for a great two-year Limerick of the Week anniversary week celebration and for so many delightful, funny, and even touching limericks. I really appreciate it!

    This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner, The Special Anniversary-Themed Limerick Winner, The Limerick Repartee Award Winners, and the Honorable Mention Winners! Limerick of the Week 105

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Reading Limericks

  108. Sara v says:

    Hi Mad, I’m terribly late to the party–however, I still wanted to wish you a happy anniversary! (part deux) and thank you for keeping me in smiles and laughter :-)