Tubing Blues

Tubing — the masochistic act of hurtling down a fall-fraught river while clinging to an inner tube. Somehow my husband Mark talked me, a devout wimp, into trying it.

Why did I go along for the rocky river ride? Perhaps I was dazed by the beauty of the Catskill Mountains’ Esopus River. Perhaps the brave (or foolish) teens who plunged heedlessly into the Esopus shamed me into it. Or maybe I was feeling guilty for being a perennial naysayer. Whatever the reason, one summer day I broke my first rule of survival: If they advise helmets, avoid it.

Before risking the river we signed a paper saying our survivors couldn’t sue. Then Mark paced while I interrogated the clerk about safety. Jagged rock protection was high on her (and my) list. Sneakers for the feet, a helmeted head, and plywood in the tube to protect the tush.

After a short, steep bus ride up river, the driver said “Just throw your tubes into the river and get in.” He pointed towards what looked suspiciously like waterfalls.

Foolish me, I’d assumed there’d be an attendant to provide advice, guidance, and moral support. And to hold the damn tube in place long enough for me to lower myself onto it and grab its pathetic excuse for handles. At the very least, they could have posted a sign saying, “Start your death ride here.” … (Tubing Blues is continued here.)

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8 Responses to “Tubing Blues”

  1. Steve the Pirate Says:

    [...] Madeleine Begun Kane presents Tubing Blues posted at Mad Kane’s Humor Blog. [...]

  2. Naughty After 40! Says:

    naughty after forty! - October 9, 2006…

    Welcome to the October 9, 2006 edition of naughty after forty!. A little later than planned but that is because I am busy getting ready for the launch of my life coaching club for women. Please feel free to come…

  3. DigitalRich Says:

    Madeleine,

    Thank you for participating in the Carnival of the Storytellers. I greatly enjoyed reading your contribution, especially since I am a ‘tuber’ myself. Well, not since I was in my teens- about 20 or so years ago.

    DigitalRich
    http://digitalrich.blogspot.com/2007/01/carnival-of-storytellers-2nd-edition.html

  4. Karen Shanley Says:

    Yeah, the part about the helmet would have got me too! Very funny, I can say, since I didn’t have to endure or survive it. :)

  5. madkane Says:

    Thanks so much DigitalRich and Karen!

  6. Outdoor Odyssey Says:

    Outdoor Odyssey Blog Carnival - May 1 Edition…

    Welcome to the May 1, 2007 edition of outdoor odyssey.

    Outdoors

    Madeleine Begun Kane presents Tubing Blues posted at Mad Kane’s Humor Blog. This is a great article about river tubing. Takes me back to my trip on the…

  7. Travel Minx Carnival Of Travel Articles #9 | Travel Minx Says:

    [...] Madeleine Begun Kane presents Tubing Blues posted at Mad Kane’s Humor Blog. [...]

  8. Travel-Eat-Sleep Says:

    Carnival of Food and Travel : #2…

    Welcome to the July 2, 2008 edition of Carnival of Food and Travel.

    I received over over 60 submissions. WOW!
    Please submit your articles for the upcoming editions of this carnival. There were some excellent articles submitted and I had a tough t…..

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