Dear Ralph: Go Away!

I used to think Ralph Nader keeps running for president because he’s an egomaniac and a blowhard.  But I’m starting to suspect that he suffers from Dubya-disease — he needs to feel relevant. 

And now it’s time for a limerick:

Dear Ralph: Go Away!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Ralph Nader has surfaced again
To proclaim he’s a prince among men
And our nation’s salvation.
Give up your fixation,
Ralph. Find a new hobby. Try zen.

For more Ralph Nader humor, check out Ralph Nader, ‘Unsafe At Any Age,’ by Don Davis and Nader Announces Plan To Wreck Election, But Prominent Crackpots Are Cool To Bid, by Andy Borowitz. And for a serious take on the topic, there’s Ralph Nader, Tragedy And Farce, by Dick Polman.

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19 Responses to “Dear Ralph: Go Away!”

  1. Mike5000 says:

    You’re Mad Kain. Ralph Nader is the only progressive left in the race. Are you seriously suggesting that any honorable person should vote for another corporate drone – the lesser of the weasels – rather than honestly voting for the candidate who would best service America?

  2. pegleghippie says:

    As a green, I can tell you that Nader isn’t my first choice, but he’s not ‘stealing democratic votes,’ at least not in my case. I never planned on voting democrat in the first place. What’s so devious about Nader running? it’s his right, and surely we can all agree that the two party system is fucked up, can’t we?

  3. Mark says:

    Tell me Mike, what has Nader done to help any third party since 2000? Has he been working on the local level to help build a legitimate third party? Had nader been working since the 2000 debacle to build a serious third party that could actually make a SERIOUS challenge, he might have some cred. As it stands however, it’s just more of the little brat throwing a tantrum because the adults stopped paying attention to him.

  4. Shade Tail says:

    Mark has it correct. A real, legitimate political party isn’t built top-down by starting a presidential bid. It is built bottom-up, with grass roots organizing, running and winning local elections, and gradually building a base to go nation-wide. Yes, that takes time. Oh dear, you actually have to be patient to get real results. What a tragedy.

    I’ve voted Green in local and state elections. I’m definitely voting Democratic for president in ’08. And anyone who seriously thinks that there is no difference between the two parties, as Nader has said from time to time, has not been paying attention. Gore would not have gone into Iraq. Heck, he might have prevented 9/11 from happening at all. And Kerry would have withdrawn the troops ASAP had he been elected.

    This time, the one overwhelming priority is to not let the GOP hold onto the White House. Everything else is insignificant compared to that. For all their flaws (neither Clinton nor Obama is liberal enough for me), both the democratic candidates are head, shoulders, and waist above anything the GOP has to offer.

  5. Oh this is a difficult one, I’m in the UK where in common with many European countries, the Green Party is a vital political entity with real strength in local communities and representation in regional Parliament, in some countries representation in national governments. We’re nowhere near getting a European Green Head of State of course but there is real hope of green political influence. I am often befuddled by the US political process, its just so different from ours, but I do get the impression that voting for Nader would be a wasted vote which is a real shame. But his message needs to get out there…

  6. […] Madeleine Begun Kane presents Dear Ralph: Go Away! posted at Mad Kane’s Political Madness. […]

  7. As an Indian, I would not like to comment on this. However, I like the limerick. Thanks!

    jumping from the cliff to prove my love?

  8. Hi Mad, Politics aside, loved the way you rhymed Zen with men…

  9. UL says:

    I liked this message-limerick…, you do them so well.

  10. paisley says:

    you know… i never found out who he was the first time around.,.. so i really doubt he will have any impact on my life this time either…..

  11. Linda Jacobs says:

    I like how this doesn’t really read like a limerick! That period at the end of the third line and the two in the last line are such a great idea. Well done!

  12. […] Madeleine Begun Kane suggests to Dear Ralph: Go Away!. (Psst. Ralph is an alien.) […]

  13. mcjeff says:

    This is what I love about many so called “Democrats” and “Liberals.” They can’t stand it when somebody actually participates in a democratic election. Ralph has every right to run, whether he’s built a party or not. And c’mon, the Greens are a joke, so why does he have to run under their banner?
    Ralph did not lose the 2000 election for Gore, Gore lost it for Gore.
    250,000 Florida Democrats voted for Bush, for Pete’s sake! Bash them!
    Ralph is correct that the Dem party is corporatist. Obama (who’s gonna be the next Prez), Hillary, almost all of them!
    Ralph is wrong about one thing. There is a difference between the Dems and Repugs. The difference is that the Repugs are up front about being corporate whores, whereas the Dems mask it with bullshit rhetoric. You don’t think Obama is bought and paid for? Think again!

  14. While Nader’s intentions per se may be all right, I’m afraid the only effect of his running might be that the U.S. will get stuck with yet another lousy Republican government (provided it will turn out to be a close race).

    Love your limerick!

  15. Steve Bates says:

    Jeez, Mad, all these Nader supporters are so whiny when confronted with criticism, just as one would expect from a Republican. Which is what they are, and what Nader is.

    Ask yourself this: where does he get his money to run? Look at the record from 2000 and 2004, and be honest with yourselves…

  16. Paul says:

    Ralph does have every right to run and to continue to lose. Ralph. please stop running !!

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    For this edition, we selected Humorist, Haikuist and Hillaryist Madeleine Begun Kane. However, her limerick submission was on the topic of Ralph Nader, and since he is on my list of topics to not blog about anytime between now and when pigs fly, I inst…