My Advice To Spammers (Limerick)

My Advice To Spammers
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear spammers, I wish you’d take heed.
A spell-check is something you need.
Though I’m surely no Freud,
You should really avoid
Sending “greeting” cards spelled more like “greed.”

Feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, please join my friends in that same activity in my limerick-offs.

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14 Responses to “My Advice To Spammers (Limerick)”

  1. Joyce Taron says:

    That was such an appropriate limerick, Mad. :P
    Here’s mine:

    Dear spammers, I wish you’d take heed:
    What you advertise I do not need.
    What you sell I don’t want.
    You can spam ’til you’re gaunt.
    Your messages I will not read!

  2. Dear spammers, I wish you’d take heed:
    Your e-mail the Net doesn’t need.
    You’re a much-reviled pest,
    An unwelcome guest.
    Begone now, with all haste and speed!

  3. Maxene says:

    Dear spammers, I wish you’d take heed.
    Nigerian prince I don’t need.
    Transfer your own dough,
    Cause all of us know,
    Your spam is quite simply your greed.

  4. Bob Simpson says:

    Dear spammer I wish you’d take heed,
    Your persistence I’ll gladly concede,
    Sex and drugs can fun,
    If you’re with the right one,
    But yours are a fake I don’t need.

  5. lissa says:

    here’s my take – perhaps I shouldn’t rhyme the whole thing? fun though

    dear spammers, I wish you’d take heed
    please stop with your continued plead
    fools might not flee
    but I will surely see
    you’re nothing but dead weed

  6. Tumblewords says:

    Fine limerick MadKane – Yours are always a good darned read and worth a giggle or two.

  7. Damian Cuffel says:

    Dear spammers, I wish you’d take heed
    How few drugs I desperately need.
    I’m not embarrassed
    My range ain’t the rarest,
    Much better than size is the seed!

  8. Jaliya says:

    Dear spammers, I wish you’d take heed
    Your ranting and raving makes fingertips bleed!
    My wee pads are scabby
    From deleting the blabby
    And blocking your words with due speed!

  9. This one fits two prompts – as my post contains multiple limericks.



  10. madkane says:

    Thanks for the kind words Tumblewords. And thanks to everyone for your limericks.

  11. Ron says:

    Hi Mad Kane,
    Catherine and I want to thank you and Mark for a very entertaining weekend indeed. We just got home and wanted to say hello.

    Here’s one for you:

    Dear spammers, I wish you’d take heed:
    Your emails I really don’t need
    My penis is fine
    Investments: divine
    Well…maybe just one naked Swede!

  12. madkane says:

    Hi Ron and Catherine. Mark and I had a great time too and look forward to more once you’ve moved to Cold Spring. And Ron, I loved your limerick and hope to see many more from you.

  13. Thanks for submitting to my online marketing blog carnival! I just published your submission. Loved your Limerick!

  14. madkane says:

    Thanks, Bill!