Light Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A man who liked traveling light…*


A criminal plot came to light…*


A woman stopped short at a light…*


The snow was supposed to be light…*


My husband was out like a light…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Light Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A woman liked traveling light,
No matter how distant her flight,
Often visiting nudists–
“No clothes” absolutists–
Who took naked delight in their rite.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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57 Responses to “Light Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. Brian Allgar says:

    (This is a variant on one I’ve done before – same joke, different words)

    They struggled in rain and dim light
    To measure the flagpole upright,
    But it kept falling flat,
    And the problem with that
    Was – they measured the length, not the height.

  2. Brian Allgar says:

    Though his needs for nutrition were light,
    The vampire felt peckish that night,
    And invited a maid
    Who had foolishly strayed:
    “My dear, do you fancy a bite?”

  3. Brian Allgar says:

    He assured her the cocktail was “light”,
    But the taste somehow wasn’t quite right.
    He had spiked her Daiquiri –
    Her memory’s bleary
    Of what might have happened that night

  4. Brian Allgar says:

    My husband is out like a light.
    He’s insistent on sex every night,
    But as soon as he scores
    He’s asleep, and he snores
    Like the sound of an elephant fight.

  5. Brian Allgar says:

    Her intellect, frankly, was light;
    She read cookery books day and night,
    And she thought that the Bard
    Was some fat or some lard
    That you wrap around meat nice and tight.

  6. Brian Allgar says:

    My output today must be light;
    This may be the last one I’ll write.
    Although it’s appalling,
    The ‘day job’ is calling –
    Yes, work is the drinking man’s blight.

  7. Jon Gearhart says:

    Charlie Brown found a tree that was light
    And quite easy to carry alright.
    They got carried away
    And it’s needle-less to say
    The show taught us of love at fir’s blight.

    (With apologies to Kevin Ahern for similarity…or was it shameless theft?)

  8. John Sardo says:

    The snow was supposed to be light
    Get your honey and snuggle up tight.
    It’ll snow up to two feet
    Mix in with cold sleet
    But under the sheet you’ll find a delight.

  9. John Sardo says:

    The snow was supposed to be light
    It was but it snowed all night
    And when came morn
    It all would adorn
    Creating a nice winter sight.

  10. John Sardo says:

    The snow was supposed to be light
    But it snowed for a week, what a fright
    The wind it would blow up
    And pile all the snow up
    Till it reached an enormous height.

  11. Judith H. Block says:

    A rich man who liked traveling light
    Had a gal who created a plight:
    Her trunks by Louis Vuitton
    Were nice but they weighed a ton
    He should have left her home, in hindsight!

  12. Judith H. Block says:

    A smart man who liked traveling light
    In women had discerning insight.
    He had a gal in every port
    Who just wanted la petite mort.
    He always knew where he’d spend the night.

  13. Judith H. Block says:

    My smart guy was out like a light
    He is indeed my shining knight.
    He always works so hard
    His firm’s in the vanguard.
    I’d love to just watch him all night.

  14. Judith H. Block says:

    The snow was supposed to be light
    I ventured to go out despite.
    Now I’m in a jam
    Don’t know where I am.
    Or if I will get home tonight.

  15. A criminal plot came to light
    To a London ‘dick”‘s clever insight
    So He and his dog
    Crept around in the fog
    And the perp ended up with a bite!

  16. Jon Gearhart says:

    As she came in and turned out the light
    Then undressed and climbed in on the right,
    I joined her in bed
    In the dark room and said,
    “I’m de-lighted yet turned on tonight!”

  17. Jen Harris says:

    When first thing I see by the light
    Is my hair in the morning – a fright
    But once it’s contained
    It has never abstained
    From inviting all kinds of delight.

  18. Jen Harris says:

    A woman stopped short at a light
    And gave her tailgater a fright
    But risking her fender
    Let to a bender
    Which was, for them both, a delight.

  19. Jen Harris says:

    A criminal plot came to light
    And led to the Guy on that night
    Remember, remember
    The fifth of November
    Parliament nearly set right!

  20. Fred Bortz says:

    Though Planck’s math used quanta of light,
    He still did not think that was right.
    Young showed light behaves
    Exactly like waves.
    Then Maxwell’s math made that case tight.

    Herr Einstein, of course, saw the light:
    In photoelectrics, you might
    Need only one quantum
    (Or more if you want ’em)
    To eject an electron. That’s right!

    Then deBroglie declared that if light
    Is both wavelike and grainy, you might
    Find electrons the same,
    And when Schrödinger came,
    We saw Quantum Mechanics take flight.

    Though limericks make this tale light,
    The science behind it is quite
    A profound undertaking
    And foundation-shaking.
    That’s why we call physicists bright.

  21. rbasler says:

    A music motif that is leit
    Is a common Wagnerian sight
    It’s a theme that’s recurring
    In an opera, all during
    If you miss it, you can’t be too bright

  22. Jon Gearhart says:

    They set course in for comedy, light
    With a cast that was eager and bright.
    They chose to employ
    Some guy named Nimoy,
    Though his Spock was more terse than they’d write.

  23. Amrit Sinha says:

    The snow was supposed to be light.
    But no snow at all, was that right?
    He wanted to stay indoors,
    Watch the game, of course,
    But, with wife he shopped to avoid a fight.

  24. Jon Gearhart says:

    When you see that cop’s bright flashing light,
    You had better slow down and move right
    Or risk making the paper
    For a high speed chase caper
    Feat’ring black and white twice in one night!

  25. Richard Diakun says:

    Staring right into the light
    burning a hole in my sight
    It isn’t much fun
    to look at the sun
    yet something you can’t do at night

  26. Byron Ives says:

    A loud crack, and spellbinding light
    Ben shouted, “Tonight is the night!”
    His wife said, “You fool!
    What’s a watt and a joule?
    You might as well go fly a kite!”

    Sorry, cheap.

  27. Konrad Schwoerke says:

    My wife will not turn off a light.
    She will let them all burn through the night.
    When I mention this fact
    With my usual tact,
    I am left to but yearn till contrite.

  28. Richard Diakun says:

    The plot fin’ly shone like a light
    when the cast sang “Let’s Go Fly A Kite”.
    It seems “Mary Poppins”
    was largely ’bout droppins
    and trippin’ our way thru the night

  29. Richard Diakun says:

    My drumming while stopped at a light
    is probably one messed up sight
    My car’s steering wheel
    has got a great feel
    and different tones mid, left and right.

  30. Jon Gearhart says:

    One duck travels at speeds fast as light.
    Time slows down for this duck in its flight,
    But a twin duck whose speeds
    Remain normal succeeds
    In a pair o’ ducks aged different, alright?

  31. Fred Bradbury says:

    Struggle and try as I might
    I just can’t reach to the light;
    ‘Cause the depths that I’m in
    From my wages of sin
    Must mean that I’ll never be right.

  32. Konrad Schwoerke says:

    Our waitress is such a delight,
    But the diners are sometimes a fright.
    One tried copping a feel;
    Now he’s wearing his meal,
    So we think she has served the guy right.

  33. Jon Gearhart says:

    If a seamstress who diets’ sew light
    And a skinny Polander’s Pole-lite,
    Then I propose
    When we wash lightweight clothes
    That’s from thin lambs, we should use Woolite!

  34. Jon Gearhart says:

    If you’re finally seeing the light
    That those waiting for marriage were right,
    You’ve just had an urgin’
    To wait for your virgin
    And she’ll wait for you, just holed tight.

  35. Jon Gearhart says:

    Without darkness, we wouldn’t know light.
    Without blindness, we wouldn’t know sight.
    Without wars, there’s no peace.
    Without whores, there’s no piece.
    Without lawyers, we wouldn’t know shite!

  36. Jon Gearhart says:

    The first PCs on memory were light
    And their CPUs heat out of sight.
    Their size filled the whole room.
    Lots of power they’d consume,
    Though they took less than one mega bite.

  37. Jon Gearhart says:

    These days we have cars, smart and light,
    That can park themselves. Oh, what a sight.
    The next thing you know,
    They’ll be makin’ it so
    With flat tires, they’ll pull off to the wright!!

  38. Jon Gearhart says:

    My new hard drive is solid and light.
    It so sleek-lined and gorgeous to sight.
    I think that I wanna
    Call this drive the piranha
    Cause it’s no less than one tear a bite!

  39. Jon Gearhart says:

    I like to keep things loose and light.
    “Have a Coke and a smile” fits me right,
    But sometimes I fear
    I’m just like flat root beer
    And my Barq’s grows much worse with no bite.

  40. Jon Gearhart says:

    On Thanksgiving, the mood here is light.
    Lots of food, family, fun, noon to night.
    We’ve got plenty pop, too
    Root Beer, Pepsi, Coke, Dew.
    We’ve had fun, though it’s been out of Sprite.

  41. Jon Gearhart says:

    My lims were all sweetness and light
    When I met Meyran’s elf in the night.
    My muse left for a G.E.L.F.
    Now I’m losing Mey’s elf,
    So I wrote this whole thing out a sprite.

  42. Val Fish says:

    The old witch was out like a light
    My chance to escape for the night
    For stolen kisses
    With my mate’s missus
    And back home in bed before light

  43. Jon Gearhart says:

    Gordon Lightfoot, or simply G. Light,
    Sang a song about cheatin’. He’s right,
    If I find you’ve been creepin’
    Round my wife and bleepin’
    With her, your last Sundown’s tonight.

  44. Jon Gearhart says:

    Being all that is awesome, I’m Lyte.
    I’m encompassing all that is right
    In the world and, of course,
    I am hung like a horse
    And your ‘noose’ loops my ‘neckline’ just right!


  45. Tim James says:

    A criminal pun came to light
    When a bedbug decided one night
    To hold a church wedding
    Right there in the bedding:
    An example of mite making rite.

  46. Konrad Schwoerke says:

    On dying, I saw a bright light,
    And my people who’d passed were in sight.
    They were waving to me,
    But I soon came to see—
    They were waving me off to the right.

  47. Allen Wilcox says:

    A woman who ran a red light
    Passed police stationed there at the site.
    To the airport she fled.
    One observant cop said,
    “I think she is trying to take flight.”

  48. Allen Wilcox says:

    A vampire avoiding the light
    Computed far into the night.
    He found in this action
    A compulsive attraction,
    Because it had been love at first byte.

  49. Jon Gearhart says:

    The commercials from old Miller Lite,
    “Less filling/Tastes great,” were quite bright.
    They used star appeal, humor,
    And knew their consumer–
    Passing piss as ambrosia done right!

  50. John Armstrong says:

    A man who liked traveling light
    Returned on the previous night
    Wait, that’s been done
    In old books of fun
    Ah me, a relative slight

  51. Allen Wilcox says:

    He was told he should turn off the light
    And then told he should go fly a kite.
    When she started to snore,
    He opened the door
    And threw her out into the night.

  52. Allen Wilcox says:


    The snow was supposed to be light,
    But it seemed that that changed overnight.
    Even Mark Ruffalo,
    Who rhymed nicely with Buffalo,
    Couod see that the town was alll white,
    And we hoped that the town was all right.

  53. Byron Ives says:

    They kissed in the smoldering light
    Of their campfire, once burning bright
    “Here, Babe, grab this wood,
    Put it in, yes, good.
    Let’s keep it hot all through the night.”

  54. Fred Bortz says:

    A photon is traveling light.
    Without it you wouldn’t have sight
    And if Planck were a Jew,
    You would ask him, “So nu?
    Why does h makes you math turn out right?”

    (This is for those “versed” in physics. For those who aren’t, E=h*nu is the formula for the energy of a photon, where h is Planck’s constant and nu is the frequency of the light.)

  55. Fred Bortz says:

    Corrected for punctuation and spelling errors:

    A photon is traveling light.
    Without it you wouldn’t have sight
    And if Planck were a Jew,
    You would ask him, “So nu?
    Why does h makes your math turn out right?”

  56. Jon Gearhart says:

    A damp cellar can make the heart light
    As an entymological site
    For a group that elects
    To study in sects
    With their peers, a combined show of mite.

  57. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun week of limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners: Limerick of the Week 190.

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Butt of Limericks.