How To Muck Up Gift-Giving

Some men send their wives Hallmark greeting cards. Then there’s Dick Kleis of Zwingle, Iowa, who got a bit more “creative” on his wife Carole’s birthday. He spent three hours spelling out a huge love note in 120,000 pounds of “good, soft, gushy, warm” manure. And proving that there’s no accounting for taste, his wife actually liked it, saying her hubby “dung good”.

Attention, dear hubby Mark … and any other man who might be inspired by this story on a birthday, anniversary, or Valentine’s Day: Don’t even think about it!

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

How To Muck Up Gift-Giving
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear hubby, I’d really be miffed
If you gave me manure as a gift.
Now I don’t expect plush
If you ain’t feeling flush.
But dung? Sweet revenge will be swift.

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9 Responses to “How To Muck Up Gift-Giving”

  1. Ha!
    I wrote on this too.

    This post includes VIDEO of the actual scene …

    What a cr*ppy way to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY? (Or CR*PPY BIRTHDAY, perhaps?)


  2. Catherine says:

    Madeline, I too would be miffed
    to receive such a sh*tty gift!
    Should the gift I collect
    Be long, thick and erect
    Then it won’t be bad being stiffed!

  3. Very funny! Perfect in fact. We just wrote about Guys and gift giving. We’re on the same page again!!

    Happy New Year!!

  4. madkane says:

    Oh Catherine you are sooooooooo bad. :)

  5. Kali says:

    Then there was the guy who gave his wife a power saw.

    And asked if he could borrow it every now and then…

  6. jazzbumpa says:

    One thing she can’t say is, “No shit!”


  7. Hansi says:

    A hundred and twenty thousand pounds of dung?
    A woeful tale that must be sung.
    A delightful little ditty
    Bout a subject, oh so shitty.
    But a good lesson from it can be wrung.

  8. JTS says:

    Delightful letter to spouse, Mad Kane, I love your limericks! Catherine’s response was wonderful too! :-))

  9. madkane says:

    Thanks so much JTS. Fun limerick, Hansi!