Etiquette Advice For Rudy Giuliani, Courtesy Of Miss Madness
You really need to stop taking cell phone calls from your latest wife while you’re on stage giving a speech. It’s weird, rude and, in a post-9/11 world, it just ain’t cool.
You probably think it makes you look relaxed and confident. And you’re also hoping to burnish your image with the family values crowd, by making people think you’re still on speaking terms with somebody in your family. (Fess up Rudy: Who was really on the phone during your NRA speech? Your secretary? Wife Number — what would the next one be — Four?
In any event, these staged on-stage calls from your “wife” simply have to stop. Aside from the weird/rude/uncool problem, people are starting to suspect that you’re afraid not to take them.
Sorry Rudy, but looking henpecked is no way to out-macho Hillary.
Let me put it this way: Can you imagine George Dubya taking a call from Laura in the middle of a press conference or during his State of the Union Address? Of course not! (From Mommy Barb maybe, but that topic’s way above my pay grade.)
Speaking of President Bush, if you’re anywhere near him, I must advise you to duck: The guy has a thing for fondling bald pates. And yes — that’s rude too.
Bye for now, Rudy. But if you (or your scary wife Judi) have any more etiquette questions, Miss Madness is here for you.
P.S. I practice divorce law too.
(For more Rudy cell phone rudeness humor, visit Don Davis at Satirical Political.) [tags]Rudy Giuliani Rudeness, Cell Phone Etiquette, Rudy & Judi, NRA Speech, Rudy V. Hillary, Henpecked Humor, Presidential Campaign, Election Satire,[/tags]