By Madeleine Begun Kane
CHENEY: Good morning, Mr. President. We need to discuss the Pitt problem. If anybody asks, we're mulling over the idea of asking Harvey to resign. (Wink, wink)
DUBYA: But I like Harvey. More important -- our pals like Harvey. What's the matter with yur eye?
CHENEY: There's nothing wrong with my eye! If anybody asks, we're mulling over the idea of asking Pitt to resign. (Wink, wink)
DUBYA: I just told ya -- I'm not dumpin Harvey! Ya really should get that eye looked at.
CHENEY: My eye's fine, damn it! Look! We're not dumping the guy. We're just mulling over the idea of asking him to resign. (Wink, wink)
DUBYA: Does it hurt?
DUBYA: Yur eye. Does it hurt?
CHENEY: No! But you're giving me chest pains.
DUBYA: Like I keep tellin ya, ya really need ta start workin that treadmill.
CHENEY: Who the hell has time for treadmills? Okay, you really need to pay attention to this.
DUBYA: Ta what?
CHENEY: Let's start over. What's happening Tuesday?
DUBYA: That's easy! It's me & Laura's silver weddin anniversary.
CHENEY: Right, but what else happens on Tuesday?
DUBYA: Did I show ya the great present I got fer her?
CHENEY: Several times. Now we need ta move on.
DUBYA: Dya think she'll like it?
CHENEY: Wives always appreciate sculptures of their husbands. Now we really need to...
DUBYA: I was plannin ta keep it at the ranch. But maybe it should stay right here in the Oval and keep me & Churchill company.
DUBYA: What's a good spot fer it?
CHENEY: I don't give a flying...
DUBYA: Hey Karl, how's tricks?
ROVE: Fine, Mr. President. Dick, did you talk to him about our Pitt problem?
CHENEY: Yes, but I didn't get anywhere. Maybe you should...
ROVE: Mr. President, where are you going?
DUBYA: I'm late fer my mornin workout.
ROVE: Hold on a sec, Mr. President. We need to talk about Pitt. Don't bring the subject up, of course. But if anybody asks, we're mulling over asking for Pitt's resignation.
DUBYA: Like I already told Dick -- I'm not dumpin Harvey!
ROVE: Look, the election's tight. The Pitt/Webster thing's hurting us. We just need to look like we're taking this thing seriously till after the election.
DUBYA: But we can't dump...
ROVE: We're not dumping. We're mulling dumping.
DUBYA: But I like...
ROVE: Okay, let's try this: If anyone asks you about Pitt, just say you remain committed to cracking down on corporate crime. Can you do that?
DUBYA: No problemo! What didn't you say so the first time? Hey, check out the great gift I got Laura!