Posts Tagged ‘Language Humor’

Do You Sanction Contronyms? (Limerick)

Monday, June 6th, 2022

Question: If someone says, “I sanction that sanction,” do you know what he means?

The word “sanction’s” an odd term to use
Cuz it’s prone to perplex and confuse.
It can mean an approval…
Or trade-list removal.
In other words: Good or bad news.

A Recipe For Trouble (Limerick)

Saturday, May 21st, 2022

An annoying acquaintance loves roe
And dishes all covered in dough.
He’ll eat beef by the herd
And most any old bird,
But he’ll always refuse to eat crow.

Wordle Downers (Limerick)

Wednesday, May 4th, 2022

Frustration’s a puzzling norm
When in word games like Wordle you’re warm:
You need one letter more
And you’re pissed to the core;
You’ve guessed “story” and “stork,” but it’s “storm.”

More Idiom Idiocy (Limerick)

Monday, April 4th, 2022

To cross ev’ry “T” ain’t just fine;
It’s required — not merely benign.
But by crossing a “U,”
You have set it askew…
And in fact you are crossing the line.

My Latest Addiction (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 22nd, 2022

Please help! I’m addicted to word games.
One might argue that some are absurd games.
I also play cards,
But (like linguists and bards)
Prefer verbal brain-teasers — my nerd games.

Buzzy Quatrain

Tuesday, February 8th, 2022

Here’s a quatrain for a change of pace:

Be careful when using
A popular buzzword.
You’re likely to learn it’s
A “formerly-was-word.”

Yet Another Wordle Limerick

Monday, January 31st, 2022

Though he’s brilliant, my husband can’t spell.
And his less/fewer usage? Pell-mell!
But despite his word-hurdle,
He beats me at Wordle
And kvells as I yell, “What fresh hell!”

Limerick For A Puzzling Day

Saturday, January 29th, 2022

It’s “Puzzle Day.” Which one’s your fav?
I’ll try the Times Crossword, when brave.
I’m better at Mini;
Don’t feel like a ninny.
But it’s Wordle I savor and crave!

National Puzzle Day is celebrated each year on January 29.

A Colo(u)rful Complaint (Limerick)

Wednesday, January 12th, 2022

After encountering a colo(u)rful complaint about my new favorite word game “Wordle,” I felt compelled to write this limerick:

Some harbo(u)r a gripe against “Wordle,”
Cuz their labo(u)rs encounter a hurdle:
Just one “u” used in rumo(u)r?
This causes ill humo(u)r…
And apparently makes their blood curdle.

Messy Limerick

Wednesday, October 20th, 2021

A gal, an industrious knitter,
Showed a huge heap of knits to her sitter:
“It’s a mess, I confess.
If you sort it, dear Tess,
I shall give you the pick of the litter.”

(Worldwide Knit In Public Day is the 2nd Saturday of June.)

Secret Affairs (Limerick)

Monday, October 18th, 2021

Two women, good friends, worked backstage.
Each was “dating” a man half her age:
A man on the crew.
Which one? Neither knew.
It turns out, both were on the same Page.

Why I Write Limericks (Limerick)

Saturday, October 9th, 2021

Writing lim’ricks meets some of my needs:
To create, vent my spleen, avoid screeds.
Written wordplay’s a ball!
And the best part of all?
It doesn’t entail making reeds.

Sketchy Artist (Limerick)

Wednesday, October 6th, 2021

A sketch artist’s drawings were raw
And flawed, rarely gazed at with awe.
Yet he won an award
For his “Gourd With A Sword.”
Fellow artists swore: “Luck of the Draw!”

Nailed It (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 5th, 2021

I called a new carpenter, Ned,
Cuz the first guy screwed up and then fled.
When I showed him the job
Ned said, “Fix it? No prob!”
Then he hit the nail right on the head.

Happy Golf Lovers Day! (October 4) (Limerick)

Monday, October 4th, 2021

Though I’m no fan of golf, I couldn’t resist writing a Golf Lovers Day limerick:

As a golfer swigged beer in a pub,
He bitched and he gobbled his grub:
“I’ve been flubbing my putts.
Being drubbed drives me nuts!”
The response to that putz? “Join the club!”

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: BREAD or BRED at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: October 16, 2021)

Saturday, October 2nd, 2021

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using BREAD or BRED at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to SELF-CONTROL, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best SELF-CONTROL-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on October 17, 2021, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, October 16, 2021 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my BREAD or BRED-rhyme limerick:

A fellow with plenty of bread
Held a fete on his boat — a big spread.
Near the end of the bash
He dropped much of his cash
In the toilet. Wealth’s gone to his head.

And here’s my SELF-CONTROL-themed limerick:

I’m beginning to notice a lag in
Restraint from a pal who’s been braggin’
That he’s wholly off beer.
But I’m starting to fear
That my trucker friend fell off the wagon.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Dither And Yawn? (Limerick)

Thursday, September 30th, 2021

When someone mentioned the word “dither” in a word-related Facebook group I belong to, I couldn’t resist the challenge of using it in a limerick:

Indecision is dicey. Don’t dither,
Or you’ll wither while plucking that zither.
Don’t quiver and quaver!
Be brave! Never waver,
Or risk running hither and thither.

Exceedingly Silly Limerick

Monday, September 27th, 2021

A fellow I know can’t spell “sneeze;”
Also “breezes” and “freezes” and “cheese.”
Though he always tries hard,
His spelling is marred;
Triple “e’s” make the man ill at ease.

Fishing For An Alibi (Limerick)

Saturday, September 25th, 2021

“It’s easy to hoodwink that stinker,”
Said a man of his wife, a big drinker.
“When coition’s my mission,
She thinks I’m out fishin’…
And falls for it hook, line, and sinker.”

Idiomatic Idiocy? (Limerick)

Thursday, September 23rd, 2021

It’s not bad enough that I’m addicted to writing limericks. Now I’m also hooked on reading/playing with idiom lists:

“I suspect that our firm has a spy,
Cuz a journo just called to ask why
We give patients the squeeze
With our vision-wear fees.
Now our practice will get a black eye.”