Posts Tagged ‘Computers’
Thursday, June 25th, 2009
My Advice To Spammers
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear spammers, I wish you’d take heed.
A spell-check is something you need.
Though I’m surely no Freud,
You should really avoid
Sending “greeting” cards spelled more like “greed.”
Feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, please join my friends in that same activity in my limerick-offs.
Tags: Computers, Email, Freud, Greeting Cards, Limericks, Spam, Spelling, Technology, Writing Prompts
Posted in Advice Humor & Poems, Communication Humor, Computer Humor, Email Humor, Internet Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Spam Humor, Technology Humor | 14 Comments »
Tuesday, June 9th, 2009
Luddite Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A hard-working author named Fink
Insisted on writing with ink.
He hated computers
And called them polluters.
Some claim he’s our long Missing Link.
By the way, in addition to being a recovering lawyer, I’m a recovering luddite and recovering technophobe. In fact, the first anthology my essays ever appeared in was Minutes of the Lead Pencil Club: Second Thoughts on the Electronic Revolution.
(Feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, please join my friends in that same activity in my limerick-offs.)
Tags: Authors & Playwrights, Computers, Electronic Revolution, Limericks, Luddites, Polluters, Technology, Writers, Writing Prompts
Posted in Books, Computer Humor, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Technology Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | 4 Comments »
Wednesday, June 3rd, 2009
I couldn’t let the launch of Google-challenger Bing pass without a limerick:
Battle of the Search Engines
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A search engine yearns to be king.
Its name, for some reason, is Bing.
It’s Microsoft’s baby.
Hurt Google? Well, maybe.
Their quest? Lots of ad business bling.
Tags: Ad Revenue, Bing, Business, Computers, Google, Internet, Limericks, Microsoft, Money, Net, Search Engines, Technology, Web
Posted in Business Humor, Computer Humor, Limericks, Marketing Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Search Engine Tools, Technology Humor | 4 Comments »
Friday, March 13th, 2009
I’ve heard some bad violinists in my day … especially back when I substitute-taught elementary school music classes. But amazingly enough, this robot violinist (while lousy, of course) is better than your average fifth grade violin student.
In honor of the robot violinist, I’ve written a double limerick:
A Robot Violinist That Plays Better Than Your Kid?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Fanatics may think it’s a sin
For a robot to play violin.
But its tone ain’t as bad
As some students I’ve had.
In a contest with them, it would win.
Yes it’s weak in vibrato and phrasing.
But its rhythm and pitch are amazing.
So you’re robot averse —
I’m still sure you’ve heard worse.
And if not, I shall brace for the hazing.
Tags: Children, Computers, Elementary School, Music, Music Students, Phrasing, Robot Musicians, Robots, Science, String Players, Substitute Teaching, Technology, Vibrato, Violinist
Posted in Children Humor, Computer Humor, Education & School Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Robot Humor, Science Humor, Technology Humor | 6 Comments »
Thursday, February 12th, 2009
Perhaps I’m out of line, but I think that when you get behind the wheel of a gazillion pound motorized vehicle, turn the ignition key, get into gear, hit the gas, and begin to move, you should maybe … I don’t know … PAY ATTENTION.
This approach has many advantages. For example, if you carefully observe your fellow drivers, you can:
a: Pick up lipstick application tips from the woman going 65;
b: Place bets on how far into your lane the guy next to you will swerve while switching CD’s or poking his iPod; … (Multitask Madness continues here.)
Tags: Autos, Cars, Computers, Driving, Funny Columns, Multitasking, Technology
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Car & Driving Humor, Computer Humor, Humor Columns & Humorous Essays, Multitasking Humor | 4 Comments »
Monday, September 24th, 2007
I dedicate this to everyone’s who’s ever been driven mad by a website or blog outage:
Web Withdrawal Woes (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This outage has led me to think
I’ve gone bonkers, berserk—need a shrink.
I keep checking the site.
It’s still down—what a plight!
Web withdrawal may drive me to drink.
Tags: Addiction Humor, Computers, Internet Limerick, Net Addict, Net Humor, Psychology Humor, Site Outage Poem, Techie Humor, Technology Verse, Web Addict, Web Humor, Web Withdrawal
Posted in Addiction Humor, Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Internet Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Technology Humor | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, February 20th, 2007
Backup Blues
By Madeleine Begun Kane
They told me to back up my drive,
Which has crashed—it’s no longer alive.
Had I heeded their warning,
I wouldn’t be mourning
My data, which didn’t survive.
Tags: Backups, Business Satire, Computer Satire, Computers, Crashes, Hard Drive, Lost Data, Money Satire, Technology, Technology Satire
Posted in Business Humor, Computer Humor, Limericks, Technology Humor, Workplace & Career Humor | 11 Comments »