Archive for the ‘Odd Holidays’ Category

Limerick Ode To The Eagles

Monday, January 10th, 2022

“Save The Eagles Day” — that’s today’s brand.
It’s a national day in our land.
Lest there be some confusion
Or even delusion,
I don’t mean the team or the band.

(“Save The Eagles Day” is celebrated each year on January 10.)

Aggrieved Roommate (Limericks)

Wednesday, January 5th, 2022

“I’m sick of your cockatiel’s turds!
Plus it bit me again!” — angry words
From a roommate, unmuffled,
Whose feathers were ruffled.
“I’m moving. Your pet’s for the birds!”

*****

There are several bird-related holidays:

National Bird Day (January 5)

Northern Parrots National Cockatiel Day (May 20)

World Parrot Day (May 31)

Trivial Limerick

Tuesday, January 4th, 2022

Here’s some info that’s useless, but true.
It is “Trivia Day.” (“Braille Day” too.)
My attempts to retain
Random facts are in vain.
So what day is today? I’ve no clue!

(Both Trivia Day and Braille Day are celebrated each year on January 4.)

Engaged By The Cello (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 29th, 2021

My beau plays the cello. His bow
Makes the loveliest music I know.
I love him, I think,
But my mother, a shrink,
Says I won’t, once I’ve heard Lorne Munroe.

Happy “International Cello Day!” (December 29)

A Heart To Heart About Bots (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 28th, 2021

I enjoy playing Hearts against bots.
Do they win many times? Alas, lots!
But they don’t stop to snack,
And they never talk smack.
They don’t gloat or take shots or share thoughts.

(Happy Card Playing Day! It falls each year on December 28.)

Fruitcake Haiku

Monday, December 27th, 2021

Today’s holiday
is National Fruitcake Day —
the cake, NOT the nuts.

(December 27 is National Fruitcake Day.)

A Short Limerick

Wednesday, December 22nd, 2021

It’s a holiday season for ME.
No, not Christmas; I’m Jewish, you see.
If I must, I’ll embellish:
The day that I relish
Is “Short Person Day,” for I’m wee.

(Short Person Day falls on December 22.)

Tied Up In Knots (Limerick)

Saturday, December 18th, 2021

This limerick would, alas, be timely, even if today (December 18) weren’t “World Knot Tying Day.”

A woman was tied up in knots
Over Covid. She feared for her tots.
Said her husband, “No vax!
I’d rather eat wax!”
In their fam’ly, the dolt calls the shots.

Haiku for “Ugly Christmas Sweater Day!”

Friday, December 17th, 2021

Dump redundancy!
U̷g̷l̷y̷ ̷C̷h̷r̷i̷s̷t̷m̷a̷s̷ ̷S̷w̷e̷a̷t̷e̷r̷ ̷D̷a̷y̷
Christmas Sweater Day.

*****
Ugly Christmas Sweater Day is celebrated each year on the 3rd Friday of December.

Limerick Ode To The Screwdriver

Tuesday, December 14th, 2021

It’s National Screwdriver Day.
The drink (not the tool) is at play.
I find vodka too rough.
Orange juice? I rebuff.
But together, great stuff, so hooray!

(Happy National Screwdriver Day, which falls on December 14.)

Pastry Day Haiku

Thursday, December 9th, 2021

I almost forgot
that today is “Pastry Day.”
That sure takes the cake!

****

December 9 is “National Pastry Day.”

For the record, sticklers would consider my pastry haiku a senryu.

Limerick Ode To Bad Hair

Wednesday, December 8th, 2021

Oy! December 8 is “Bad Hair Day!”

“Bad Hair Day’s” today. It’s displeasin’
When your hair appears strangled by teasin’,
Or looks dry and yet oily;
Behaving disloyally!
I’m tempted to cite mine for treason.

A Limerick Ode To Dice

Saturday, December 4th, 2021

“Our son has a terrible vice;
He’s a gambler and not very nice.
When we tell him to stop,
He says, ‘Mother and Pop,
All my cards on the table: No dice!'”

(December 4 is “National Dice Day.”)

Ban This Holiday? (Limerick)

Saturday, December 4th, 2021

Of the many odd hol’days I find,
There are some that I can’t get behind:
Today’s “Cheater Day!” Why
Salute such a guy?
Oh, it’s “Cheetah” Day? Oops! Never mind!

What’s There To Love About “Chocolates Day?”

Monday, November 29th, 2021

In my latest limerick, I condemn yet another holiday:

It is “Chocolates Day.” I decry it!
Only ONE day a year? I don’t buy it!
So let’s sweeten the deal:
“Choc’lates Month” would, I feel,
Surely spice up each meal. Kindly try it.

It’s Mouse Day! (Limerick)

Wednesday, November 17th, 2021

Today we must honor the mouse.
Not the rodent, of course, or I’d grouse.
It’s the patent-grant day
For the mouse-gizmo. Yay!
(For a rodent, I’d rope in my spouse.)

(On Nov 17, 1970, Douglas Engelbart was granted the patent for the first computer mouse.)

Limerick Ode To The Horse

Tuesday, November 16th, 2021

Happy “Horse Appreciation Day!” (November 16)

I wouldn’t dare ride on a horse.
My back couldn’t take it, of course.
But please do not feast
On that beautiful beast.
Eat horse-meat? Then brace to face force.

A Clarinet Tale (Limerick)

Tuesday, November 16th, 2021

Happy “World Clarinet Day!” (November 16)

A woman who played clarinet,
Used vibrato; I’ll never forget,
Cuz the maestro freaked out;
“You’re ousted!”– his shout.
Now she can’t get a gig on a bet.

(For those unfamiliar with the clarinet vibrato issue, clarinet vibrato is generally considered a symphony orchestra no-no, but it’s used in jazz and klezmer music. However, when a symphony orchestra plays something with a jazz influence, such as Gershwin, the occasional exception is made.)

Yet Another Hairy Limerick

Thursday, November 11th, 2021

A pissed patron returned to Pierre’s
And demanded free haircut repairs:
“Your stylist destroyed
My look. Fire Floyd!”
The reply? “Kindly stop splitting hairs.”

(Hairstylist Appreciation Day is April 25, and National Hair Day is October 1.)

Limerick Ode To Science

Wednesday, November 10th, 2021

A silly limerick to celebrate “World Science Day.” (November 10)

I’m bewildered by scholarly articles
About physics and virtual particles.
Since I’m dense about science,
I’m prone to reliance
On lim’ricks to bolster my smarticles.