Archive for the ‘Music Poems’ Category
Saturday, January 7th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using RUDE, RUED or ROOD at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to DESTRUCTION, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best DESTRUCTION-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: STRIDE, HANDY, PUNISH, FLY, BAIL.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on February 5, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, February 4, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my RUDE, RUED or ROOD-Rhyme Limerick:
I am stunned by the way you behave.
It appears you were raised in a cave.
You’ve a terrible tude
And you’re crude, lewd, and rude.
So there’s only one word for you: KNAVE!
And here’s my DESTRUCTION-Themed Limerick:
Here’s a factoid not everyone knows:
Perfectionist Brahms alas chose
To destroy some great stuff
He thought NOT up to snuff.
How I wish that he di’n’t decompose!
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
I tried to play “stride,” but I failed.
My small hands lacked the reach, so I bailed.
But I still remain sold
On stride pianists of old,
Whose fingers would fly, as they wailed.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Brahms Humor, Brahms Limerick, Competition Limerick, Composer Humor, Composer Limerick, Composers, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Music, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Pianist Humor, Pianist Limerick, Piano Humor, Piano Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Rudeness Humor, Rudeness Limerick, Stride Pianist, Stride Piano, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 173 Comments »
Tuesday, December 13th, 2022
A fellow who plays violin
Bears his neck pain with grace and a grin:
“Yes the problem is big,
But it comes with the gig;
I must take all my aches on the chin.”
(December 13th is National Violin Day.)
Tags: December Holidays, Music, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Musical Instruments, Musical Instruments Humor, Musical Verse, Musician Humor, National Violin Day, Odd Holidays, Violin Day, Violin Humor, Violin Limerick, Violin Verse
Posted in Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on The Violinist’s Plight (Limerick)
Monday, November 7th, 2022
When I priced grand pianos today,
I heard quotes, grandiose, with dismay.
They cost too many grand,
And my right and left hand
Lack the cash to buy keyboard cachet.
*****
Happy World Pianist Day! (November 8)
Tags: Grand Piano, Money Humor, Money Limerick, November Holidays, Odd Holidays, Pianist Day, Pianist Humor, Pianist Limerick, Piano Humor, Piano Limerick, Shopping Humor, Shopping Limerick, World Pianist Day
Posted in Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays, Shopping Humor | Comments Off on Grand Shopping Plans (Limerick)
Sunday, November 6th, 2022
A limerick in honor of National Saxophone Day:
A fellow was feeling distressed;
He was restless and NOT at his best.
So he pulled out his axe
And at midnight played sax.
As house-guests go, THAT guy’s a pest!
Tags: Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, November Holidays, Odd Holidays, Sax Humor, Sax Limerick, Saxophone Humor, Saxophone Limerick
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, House & Home Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Noise Humor, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Sax Day Blues
Monday, October 10th, 2022
Most orchestra members would groan
At the principal trumpeter’s tone.
But his job was secure,
Cuz his lips held allure
For the maestro, a horny old crone.
*****
National Trumpet Day falls on October 10.
Tags: Bawdy Humor, Bawdy Limerick, Bawdy Limericks, Brass Players, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Musical Instrument, Musician Humor, Musician Limerick, National Trumpet Day, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Trumpet Day, Trumpet Humor, Trumpet Limerick
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Yet Another Brassy Limerick
Monday, September 19th, 2022
A British guitarist named Stan
Was playing a concert in Cannes,
When an audience member
Threw rocks and an ember…
And that’s when the Brit hit the fan.
Tags: Audience Humor, Audience Limerick, Guitar Humor, Guitar Limericks, Guitars, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limericks, Violence Humor, Violence Limerick
Posted in Idiom Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Wordplay | Comments Off on The Concert Kerfuffle (Limerick)
Wednesday, September 14th, 2022
My self-challenge for today was writing a limerick using the new-to-me word “fugleman.”
An assertive, decisive, and frugal man
Was also an excellent bugle man.
He would make extra dough
Playing band gigs and so
In parades, he was always the fugleman.
Tags: Band Humor, Band Limerick, Bugle Humor, Bugle Limerick, Frugality, Fugleman, Marching Humor, Marching Limerick, Money & Finance Humor, Money Limerick, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Parade Humor, Parade Limericks
Posted in Language Humor, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, August 3rd, 2022
When students are told to play scales,
You’re likely to hear lots of wails;
Scales are boring as hell,
But to ever play well
They’re a must! (Also trim your damn nails!)
Tags: Music Education, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Piano Humor, Piano Limerick, Scales Humor, Scales Limerick
Posted in Education & School Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems | Comments Off on Practice, Practice, Practice! (Limerick)
Saturday, July 2nd, 2022
A would-be musician was lax
About practicing scales on his sax.
Yet he landed a seat
In a band — no mean feat,
But then blew it and soon got the axe.
Tags: Band Humor, Band Limerick, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Sax Humor, Sax Limerick
Posted in Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems | Comments Off on The Not-So-Sharp Musician (Limerick)
Friday, July 1st, 2022
A minor composer named Bea
Only wrote in A Minor. “You see,
Its sound is the best,”
She’d respond when a pest
Asked her why. “It’s my signature key!”
Tags: Composer Humor, Composer Limerick, Composition Humor, Composition Limerick, Creativity Humor, Creativity Limerick, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick
Posted in Creativity Verse, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, March 29th, 2022
A woman with awesome technique
(On the piano I mean, you damn freak)
Would caress all the keys
With both power and ease,
Till she brought ev’ry piece to its peak.
(World Piano Day is celebrated on the 88th day of each year.)
Tags: March Holidays, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Odd Holidays, Piano Day, Piano Humor, Piano Limerick, World Piano Day
Posted in Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on A Tale Of Technique (Limerick)
Monday, March 28th, 2022
A crazy conductor named Dick
Had a fondness for “food on a stick.”
The guy was far gone;
Used his skewer-baton
To throw food at the winds with a flick.
*****
Happy “Something On A Stick Day.” (March 28)
Tags: Baton Humor, Baton Limerick, Conductor Limerick, Conductors Humor, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Food On A Stick, Food On A Stick Day, March Holidays, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Musicians Humor, Odd Holidays, Orchestra Musicians, Skewer Humor, Something On A Stick Day, Woodwinds Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Food & Drink Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, December 29th, 2021
My beau plays the cello. His bow
Makes the loveliest music I know.
I love him, I think,
But my mother, a shrink,
Says I won’t, once I’ve heard Lorne Munroe.
Happy “International Cello Day!” (December 29)
Tags: Cello Day, Cello Humor, Cello Limerick, Dating Humor, Dating Limerick, December Holidays, International Cello Day, Lorne Munroe, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Odd Holidays
Posted in Dating Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Engaged By The Cello (Limerick)
Tuesday, November 16th, 2021
Happy “World Clarinet Day!” (November 16)
A woman who played clarinet,
Used vibrato; I’ll never forget,
Cuz the maestro freaked out;
“You’re ousted!”– his shout.
Now she can’t get a gig on a bet.
(For those unfamiliar with the clarinet vibrato issue, clarinet vibrato is generally considered a symphony orchestra no-no, but it’s used in jazz and klezmer music. However, when a symphony orchestra plays something with a jazz influence, such as Gershwin, the occasional exception is made.)
Tags: Clarinet Day, Clarinet Humor, Clarinet Limerick, Conductor Humor, Conductor Limerick, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, November Holidays, Odd Holidays, Orchestra Humor, Orchestra Limerick, World Clarinet Day
Posted in Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on A Clarinet Tale (Limerick)
Monday, November 15th, 2021
Just in time for “National Drummer Day!” (November 15)
A kazoo’s used to alter your humming
With a dull, buzzy drone that’s mind-numbing.
So I’m NOT a big fan,
But won’t call for a ban,
Cuz at least it’s less irksome than drumming.
Tags: Drum Humor, Drum Limerick, Drummer Day, Drums Humor, Humming Humor, Humming Limerick, Kazoo Humor, Kazoo Limerick, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Music Limericks, National Drummer Day, November Holiday, November Holidays, Percussion Humor, Percussion Limerick
Posted in Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holdays | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, November 10th, 2021
Happy Bong Day! (November 10)
A singer who longed for a bong
(Though it’s bad for her voice and so wrong)
Called a seller she knew.
They met up at the zoo,
Where a bongload was bought for a song.
Tags: Bong Day, Bong Humor, Grass Humor, Grass Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Marijuana Humor, Marijuana Limerick, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, November Holidays, Odd Holidays, Singer Humor, Singer Limerick, Singers
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Longing For A Bong (Limerick)
Saturday, November 6th, 2021
Happy “Sax Day!” And happy birthday to Adolphe Sax, its inventor! (November 6)
A horny musician named Phil
When flirting would trumpet his skill.
But he mispronounced “sax,”
The name of his ax,
So his chance of romance went downhill.
Tags: Adolphe Sax, Battle of the Sexes, Bawdy Humor, Bawdy Limerick, Inventions Poem, Inventors, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, National Saxophone Day, November Holidays, Odd Holidays, Sax Day, Sax Humor, Sax Limerick, Saxophone Day, Saxophone Humor, Saxophone Limerick
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Bawdy Limericks, Inventions Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Celebrating Sax (Limerick)
Monday, October 25th, 2021
Happy “World Opera Day!” (October 25)
“Sustaining high notes can be hard,”
Said an opera singer who starred
In Norma; she claims
That it’s not fun and games,
But a contest of wills, no holds barred.
Tags: Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Norma, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Opera Day, Opera Humor, Opera Limerick, Singers, Singing Humor, Singing Limerick, World Opera Day
Posted in Idiom Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays, Wordplay | Comments Off on Operatic Limerick
Thursday, October 21st, 2021
“We have lost sev’ral members, I hear,”
Said the maestro. “Some key ones, I fear.
It’s too late for auditions
To find new musicians.
I guess we must play it by ear.”
Tags: Audition Humor, Audition Limerick, Conductor Humor, Conductor Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Musician Humor, Musician Limerick, Orchestra Humor, Orchestra Limerick
Posted in Idiom Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems | Comments Off on Missing Musicians (Limerick)
Tuesday, October 12th, 2021
At the piano the man’s an old hand;
He is one of the best in the land.
But he still has regrets
And never forgets:
Having more than one hand would be grand.
Tags: Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Piano Humor, Piano Limerick, Wordplay Humor, Wordplay Limerick
Posted in Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Wordplay | Comments Off on Handy Limerick