Archive for the ‘Clumsiness Humor’ Category
Monday, August 2nd, 2021
Did you know that “balter” means dance clumsily? I didn’t either. But now that I do, I can’t resist using it in a limerick:
On the dance floor, she’d frequently falter.
People tried not to laugh as she’d balter.
And once as she “danced,”
A man (not entranced)
Yelled from back in the crowd: “Kindly halt’er!”
Tags: Balter, Clumsiness Humor, Clumsiness Verse, Dance Humor, Dance Limerick
Posted in Clumsiness Humor, Dance Humor, Limericks | Comments Off on Floored By Dancing (Limerick)
Sunday, November 27th, 2016
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using ICE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to SHOPPING, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best SHOPPING-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on December 11, 2016, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, December 10, 2016 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
I’m a klutz who used FIGURE skates twice.
Would I try again? Never! No dice!
I kept fretting I’d fall,
Hit the wall, and then sprawl,
As I skated on very thin ice.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Figure Skating, Ice Skating, Klutziness, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Outdoor Sports, Poetry & Prompts, Skating Humor, Sports Humor, Winter Humor, Winter Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clumsiness Humor, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Sports Humor | 87 Comments »
Thursday, February 18th, 2016
Thumbs are handy for women and men;
So convenient when we have a yen
To shake hands, hitch a ride,
Grab and lift, move that slide.
I just wish I had fewer than TEN.
Happy Thumb Appreciation Day. (February 18)
Tags: All Thumbs Humor, Clumsiness Humor, Clumsiness Verse, Dexterity Humor, February Holidays, Hand Humor, Odd Holidays, Thumb Appreciation Day, Thumb Humor
Posted in Clumsiness Humor, Limericks, Odd Holdays | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To The Thumb
Wednesday, May 6th, 2015
A Window Into My Guilt (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
You’re sure to encounter frustration
With laptops, when spilling libation:
Your computer won’t thrive,
You may lose your hard drive,
And you’ll likely face defenestration.
Tags: Beverages, Clumsiness Humor, Clumsiness Verse, Computers Verse, Defenestrate, Drinking Humor, Drinking Limerick, Laptop Humor, Operating Systems, Technology Humor, Windows Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clumsiness Humor, Computer Humor, Limericks, Technology Humor | Comments Off on A Window Into My Guilt (Limerick)
Thursday, December 18th, 2014
Dear Klutzy Gift-Givers (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Are your fingers all thumbs? Then beware!
Please don’t try to convince her you care
By wrapping your gift.
One quick look — she’ll be miffed:
“Why’s my present been mauled by a bear?”
Tags: Christmas Gift Humor, December Holidays, Gift Giving Humor, Gift Humor, Gift Wrapping Humor, Holiday Humor
Posted in Clumsiness Humor, Gift Giving Humor, Holiday Humor, Limericks, Relationship Humor | Comments Off on Dear Klutzy Gift-Givers (Limerick)
Monday, February 21st, 2011
Though I’m never safe,
his arms always comfort me,
and that must suffice.
*****
Ballroom dancing class—
learning creative ways to
defeat the rumba.
*****
Morning legs dangle
off the bed, as antique joints
brace for their touch down.
*****
Feeling elated—
great, yet dampened by knowing
what’s soon to follow.
*****
Poised atop mirage
of a career, gazing down
at life left behind.
*****
(I wrote the 1st haiku for We Write Poems’ safe prompt; the 4th haiku for Sensational Haiku Wednesday’s elation prompt; and the 5th haiku for One Single Impression’s top prompt and Haiku Heights’ mirage prompt.)
Tags: Aging, Arms, Career Poem, Dance Classes, Dancing Humor, Haiku & Senryu, Health, Husband Wife Haiku, Legs Humor, Mood Humor, Rumba, Safety Verse, Workplace Poetry
Posted in Clumsiness Humor, Dance Humor, Haiku & Senryu, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Leisure Time Humor, Lessons Haiku, Mental Health Humor, Personal, Relationship Haiku, Relationship Humor, Workplace & Career Humor | 32 Comments »
Wednesday, January 5th, 2011
Airplane Piloting 101: If you must spill coffee, spill it on your co-pilot … and not on the plane’s communication’s equipment.
A United Airlines flight from Chicago to Frankfurt, Germany, was diverted to Toronto this week after the pilot dumped a cup of coffee on the plane’s communication’s equipment. The unwanted liquid triggered a series of emergency codes, including one for a hijacking, according to Transport Canada, the agency that regulates transportation in Canada.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Diversion Verse
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A pilot with coffee needs skills
To captain his plane without spills.
So I don’t mean to grouse,
But kindly don’t douse
The controls, cuz that’s flying no-frills.
Tags: Airline Gripes, Airplane Trips, Coffee Drinks Humor, Coffee Verse, Electronic Equipment, Emergency Landing, Pilots, Transportation, Travel Humor, Travel Poetry, United Airlines
Posted in Clumsiness Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Technology Humor, Travel Humor | 3 Comments »
Wednesday, October 20th, 2010
Slovenly Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow whose shirt was all stained
Saw his lovely wife’s look — it was pained.
“You’re so messy with pasta,”
She chided him. “Basta!
You’re just like your dad — it’s ingrained.”
UPDATE: National Pasta Day is October 17 and World Pasta Day is October 25.
Tags: Appearance Humor, Battle of the Sexes, Clothing Poem, Eating Limerick, Food Poem, Grooming Verse, Husband Wife Limerick, Marriage Humor, National Pasta Day, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Sloppiness, World Pasta Day
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Clumsiness Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Fashion Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays, Relationship Humor | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, February 23rd, 2010
My lifelong klutziness is starting to get on my nerves. Okay, I don’t complain when I fall while trying to swing dance. Not too much, anyway. After all, there’s assumption of risk involved. But just the other day I managed to fall off a folding chair. And that’s plain stupid … not to mention, embarrassing:
Feeling Silly … And Sore (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
If I fall while I dance, I don’t care:
It’s a case of swing dancer, beware.
But my clumsiness irks
When I’m one of those jerks
Who foolishly falls off a chair.
Tags: Assumption of Risk, Clumsiness Verse, Embarrassing Experiences, Folding Chair Dangers, Trip & Fall Limerick
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clumsiness Humor, Dance Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limericks | 3 Comments »