Archive for the ‘Clothing Humor’ Category
Tuesday, October 18th, 2022
This limerick is a very compressed version of a necktie adventure with hubby Mark. And I can’t think of a better way to celebrate “International Necktie Day.”
“You MUST wear a necktie to enter,”
Mark was told. He’s a necktie dissenter,
But he re-tied his tie
Till our drinks were dropped by,
Then removed it — my waitress tormenter.
Tags: Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, International Necktie Day, Necktie Day, Necktie Humor, Necktie Limerick, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Restaurant Humor, Restaurant Limerick, Tie Humor, Tie Limerick, Ties
Posted in Clothing Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Restaurant Reviews & Humor | 1 Comment »
Monday, October 17th, 2022
“I’ve a hunch you had pasta for brunch.
There are stains on your clothing — a bunch.
And they’ll never come out;
Of that fact there’s no doubt.
You should learn not to leak when you lunch.”
*****
Happy National Pasta Day! (October 17)
Tags: Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Food Humor, Food Limerick, National Pasta Day, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Pasta Day, Stains, Stains Humor, Stains Limerick
Posted in Clothing Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Celebrating Pasta (Limerick)
Wednesday, August 31st, 2022
Since Wordsmith’s “Word of the Day” today is “Hotheaded,” I decided to use it in a limerick:
A hotheaded fellow named Hugh
Was irked by a huge check-out queue.
To disperse the long line
He yelled “Gun!” — the damn swine.
He wears stripes now; “lines” up the wazoo!
Tags: Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Gun Humor, Gun Limerick, Hotheaded, Language Humor, Lines Humor, Lines Limerick, Prison Humor, Prison Limerick, Queues Humor, Stripes, Word of the Day, WordSmith, WOTD
Posted in Clothing Humor, Crime & Punishment Humor, Guns & Safety Humor, Language Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Word of the Day | Comments Off on Hotheaded Hugh (Limerick)
Wednesday, May 18th, 2022
A would-be attacker named Bill
Is disguised and in black, but lacks skill:
He trips on his way
To assaulting his prey.
Though inept he’s, at least, dressed to kill.
Tags: Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Crime & Punishment Humor, Crime Limerick, Dress Humor, Dress Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Ineptness, Violence Humor, Violence Limerick
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Crime & Punishment Humor, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Physical Appearance | Comments Off on The Incompetent Felon (Limerick)
Sunday, April 24th, 2022
He showed off his coat with a swagger:
“It’s a one-of-a-kind,” said the bragger.
Then he brandished a knife:
“I’ll use THIS on the wife!”
His behavior? Sub-par cloak-and-dagger.
Tags: Braggart Verse, Bragging Humor, Bragging Limerick, Cloak And Dagger, Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Coat Humor, Coat Limerick, Idioms Humor, Idioms Limerick, Knife Humor, Knife Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Weapons Humor, Weapons Limerick
Posted in Clothing Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Idiom Humor, Marriage Humor, Weapons Humor | Comments Off on Cloaked In Bravado (Limerick)
Saturday, April 16th, 2022
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using WASTE or WAIST at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to COMMUNICATION, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best COMMUNICATION-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on May 1, 2022, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, April 30, 2022 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my WASTE or WAIST-rhyme limerick:
Said a fellow, “Alas and alack,
My new pants are too tight in the back
And the front of the waist.
(They were ordered in haste.)
I need someone to cut me some slack.”
And here’s my COMMUNICATION-themed limerick:
Dear hubby, you’re right in the kitchen,
And I’m elsewhere, so though you are itchin’
To share rumors or views,
A complaint or the blues,
I can NOT hear your news, schmooze, or bitchin’.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Alterations Humor, Clothing Humor, Communication Humor, Communication Limerick, Competition Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Pants Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Slacks Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Communication Humor, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 157 Comments »
Thursday, March 17th, 2022
I always wear socks inside out.
That’s unseemly to many, no doubt.
But my feet ain’t discreet:
“Scratchy sock-seams,” they bleat.
How I hate when extremities shout!
May 9 is National Lost Sock Memorial Day. And December 4 is National Sock Day.
Tags: Clothing Humor, Comfort Humor, Comfort Limerick, Fashion Humor, Feet Humor, Feet Limerick, Foot Humor, Footware Humor, Lost Sock Memorial Day, National Sock Day, Seams, Sock Day, Socks, Socks Humor, Socks Limerick
Posted in Clothing Humor, Fashion Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, January 18th, 2022
A talkative tailor named Chip
Dished the dirt at a spirited clip.
Some patrons with clout
Got the babbler bawled out;
He was ordered to “button his lip.”
Tags: Clothing Humor, Communication Humor, Gossip Humor, Gossip Limerick, Idiom Humor, Tailor Humor, Tailor Limerick, Talkativeness
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks | Comments Off on Blathering Limerick
Saturday, January 8th, 2022
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using BOLD or BOWLED at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to INJURIES, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best INJURY-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on January 23, 2022, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, January 22, 2022 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my BOLD or BOWLED-rhyme limerick:
“You are scantily clad, which is bold,
Cuz I’ve just been outside, and it’s cold.
Your dress seems designed
To freeze your behind,
So you’d best put that ‘hot’ garb on hold.”
And here’s my INJURY-themed limerick:
A young man hurled a tool and yelled, “Catch it.”
And his friend somehow managed to snatch it,
But he’s terribly mad;
He was injured. It’s bad!
No surprise, he won’t bury the hatchet.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Competition Limerick, Hatchet Humor, Injury Humor, Injury Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Tool Humor, Tool Limerick, Weather Humor, Weather Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Contests, Fashion Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Weather Humor | 238 Comments »
Friday, December 17th, 2021
When I learn a new word like “jorts,” I feel compelled to use it in a limerick:
“Don’t you dare wear those frumpy old jorts,”
A gal to her husband exhorts.
“Making shorts out of jeans
Is a well-designed means
To induce me to take to the courts.”
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Jeans Humor, Jorts Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Legal Limerick, Marriage Humor, Shorts Humor, Style Humor, Style Limerick
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Physical Appearance | Comments Off on Out Of Sorts About “Jorts” (Limerick)
Friday, December 17th, 2021
Dump redundancy!
U̷g̷l̷y̷ ̷C̷h̷r̷i̷s̷t̷m̷a̷s̷ ̷S̷w̷e̷a̷t̷e̷r̷ ̷D̷a̷y̷
Christmas Sweater Day.
*****
Ugly Christmas Sweater Day is celebrated each year on the 3rd Friday of December.
Tags: Clothes Humor, Clothes Limerick, Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, December Holidays, Odd Holidays, Sweater Humor, Sweater Limerick, Ugly Christmas Sweater Day
Posted in Clothing Humor, Odd Holidays | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, December 1st, 2021
Shop online? Have a clothes-buying spree?
It has always seemed risky to me.
But I gave it a try;
Bought some tees on the fly,
And was floored when they fit to a T.
Tags: Clothes, Clothes Humor, Clothes Limerick, Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Online Shopping, Shopping Humor, Shopping Limerick, Tees Limerick
Posted in Clothing Humor, Internet Humor, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Shopping Humor | Comments Off on A Suitable Limerick
Saturday, November 20th, 2021
“Wet clothes in the hamper? That’s foul!”
Said a gal to her spouse, with a scowl.
“What is wrong with you men!?
If you do it again,
I’ll divorce you and throw in the towel.”
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Clothes Humor, Clothes Limerick, Clothing Limerick, Cothing Humor, Divorce Humor, Divorce Limerick, Hamper Humor, Hamper Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Laundry Humor, Laundry Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Relationship Humor, Relationship Limerick, Relatives Humor, Relatives Limerick
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Clothing Humor, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Relationship Humor | Comments Off on A Hampered Relationship (Limerick)
Saturday, August 21st, 2021
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using LOON or LUNE or BALLOON or SALOON at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to MEMORY, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best MEMORY-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on September 5, 2021, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, September 4, 2021, at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my LOON/LUNE/BALLOON/SALOON-rhyme limerick:
A fellow, as mad as a loon,
Would strip naked outside ev’ry noon,
Till a note came. ’Twas snide:
“Were I you, I would hide
All my privates; your prick’s picayune.
And here’s my MEMORY-themed limerick:
Once again, I am drawing a blank.
My recall’s, alas, in the tank.
My brain feels bombarded
By facts, soon discarded.
So Google’s my memory bank.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter
Tags: Bawdy Humor, Blank Memory, Brain Humor, Brain Limerick, Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Competition Limerick, Google Humor, Google Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Memory Humor, Memory Limerick, Naked Humor, Naked Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Memory Humor, Mental Health Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 256 Comments »
Monday, August 9th, 2021
Sometimes, when my limerick inspiration is “on the ropes,” I’ll start with a random idiom. (In this case, my initial first line involved a “clothing boutique.” But when I thought of the last line, I changed the type of store for obvious reasons.)
With her laundromat shop on the ropes,
She was suff’ring a case of the mopes.
How she yearned to earn more!
And the plight of her store
Had reduced her to watching the soaps.
Tags: Business Humor, Business Limerick, Depression, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Idioms Humor, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Laundromat, Laundry Humor, Limerick Writing Humor, Money Limerick, Mood Humor, Mood Limerick, Soap Humor, Soap Opera Humor, Store Humor
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Business Humor, Clothing Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | Comments Off on On The Ropes (Limerick)
Friday, July 9th, 2021
Here’s a birthday limerick for my husband Mark, in response to his joking (I hope) query: “Mad, it’s my Birthday, and I’m feeling a bit down, so would it be OK if I visited our local ecdysiast?”
Happy birthday to Mark! You’re the best!
Though you’re old, you still live life with zest.
I am joking, of course;
If you’re old, I perforce
Am antique. (So no dancers undressed!)
Tags: Age Humor, Bawdy Humor, Birthday Limerick, Clothing Humor, Dancing Humor, Husband Wife Humor, Marriage Humor, Old Age Humor, Stripper Humor
Posted in Aging Humor & Verse, Bawdy Limericks, Birthday Verse, Clothing Humor, Dance Humor, Limericks, Personal | Comments Off on Birthday Limerick For Hubby Mark
Saturday, May 29th, 2021
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SET or BeSET or UpSET at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TRENDS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TRENDS-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on June 13, 2021, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, June 12, 2021 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SET or BeSET or UpSET-rhyme limerick:
I need all the sleep I can get,
But I can’t get to sleep on a bet.
(Or a bed, for that matter.)
I blame all the chatter
My brain conjures up. I’m beset.
And here’s my TRENDS-themed limerick:
If I tried to be cool, I would fail.
Trends are nothing I ever would hail.
If I wear something “in,”
It has probably been
Purchased decades ago … and on sale.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Brain Humor, Brain Limerick, Clothes Shopping, Clothing Humor, Competition Limerick, Fad Humor, Insomnia Humor, Insomnia Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Shopping Humor, Sleep & Insomnia Humor, Sleep Limerick, Trends Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Contests, Fashion Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Sleep & Insomnia Humor | 150 Comments »
Sunday, February 16th, 2020
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using CASH or CACHE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to CLOTHING, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best CLOTHING-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on March 1, 2020 right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, February 29, 2020 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my CASH/CACHE-Rhyme limerick:
I’m in a big rush and must dash
To the bank, cuz I’m all out of cash.
Then there’s lunch and a meeting
And hours of tweeting
Snide gripes — pols and neighbors to bash.
And here’s my CLOTHING-themed limerick:
A woman was totally bare;
She’d removed all her clothes on a dare,
Then shopped aroun’ town
Till a cop flagged her down.
Her excuse? “I have nothing to wear.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Bawdy Humor, Clothes Shopping, Competition Limerick, Law And Order, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Money Limerick, Nudity, Poetry & Prompts, Police Humor, Social Media Humor, Tweet Humor, Twitter Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Shopping Humor, Social Media Humor, Twitter Humor | 128 Comments »
Wednesday, August 21st, 2019
A woman with terrible taste
Believed fashion and style were a waste,
And when items she owned
Became trendy she groaned;
They were thrown in the garbage posthaste.
Happy World Fashion Day! (August 21)
Tags: August Holidays, Clothing Humor, Fashion Day, Fashion Limerick, Odd Holidays, Style Limerick, World Fashion Day
Posted in Clothing Humor, Fashion Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Unfashionable Limerick
Saturday, March 10th, 2018
Though it’s “Skirt Day,” I’d rather wear pants,
Whether walking or trying to dance.
I’ll ponder and pause,
Lest I feature my flaws —
Flaws that skirts simply love to enhance.
Tags: Clothes Humor, Clothing Humor, Fashion Humor, Fashion Verse, Flaws, Flaws Humor, March Holidays, National Skirt Day, Odd Holidays, Skirt Day, Skirt Humor, Skirts
Posted in Clothing Humor, Fashion Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Skirting Skirt-Racks (Limerick)