Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: Rain or Reign or Rein at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using Rain or Reign or Rein at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to BIRDS, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best BIRD-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on July 10, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, July 9, 2016 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

Use the wipers. It’s starting to rain.
You’re drifting, so stay in your lane.
Slow down! Yellow light!
It’s a left — not a right!
Backseat drivers — a car owner’s bane!

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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106 Responses to “Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: Rain or Reign or Rein at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5”

  1. Marty Gerendasy says:

    Queen Elizabeth’s had quite a reign,
    But the whole thing could be all in vain.
    ‘Cause the E.U. secession
    Could bring on a depression,
    And her country could go down the drain.

  2. Brian Allgar says:

    The Donald was proud of his brain,
    But in Scotland, was heard to complain
    “It’s not what it was
    When I got here – because.
    Of your weather, it’s shrunk in the rain.”

  3. Dave Johnson says:

    The eagle was soaring on high,
    When it spotted a drone drifting by.
    A battle plan hatched;
    Then it easily snatched
    That mechanical pest from the sky.

  4. Marty Gerendasy says:

    Tell me, what good is trav’ling by plane,
    When it won’t leave the ground in the rain?
    Yet another delay!
    Happens day after day!
    From now on, I’ll be going by train.

  5. Marty Gerendasy says:

    Those blankety blankety birds
    Keep on bombing my head with their turds!
    I think you’ll understand,
    And my verse won’t be banned
    If I blankety blank the bad words!

  6. Judith Block says:

    Without your sweet smile, there is rain.
    I laugh but my heart is in pain.
    It hurts you’re not mine,
    I miss the sunshine;
    I long for your kisses again.

  7. Judith Block says:

    You want a wild ride, grab a rein;
    She’ll ride you and drive you insane!
    She’ll seduce and excite,
    You’ll have such delight
    You’ll beg her to do it again.

  8. Judith Block says:

    The problem was bread from rye grain.
    The dampness, induced by the rain.
    Ergot fungus the cause,
    This should give one pause.
    Salem “Witches” were really insane.

  9. Brian Allgar says:

    He fitted the bridle and rein
    On the bimbo. She didn’t complain,
    But she misunderstood
    When he said “Toss me good!”
    Now he’s lying in traction and pain.

  10. Judith Block says:

    This election is just for the birds
    I can think of more colorful words.
    As of this present date
    There is just so much hate
    Among diverse political herds.

  11. Judith Block says:

    To fly with a bird’s skill and grace!
    To glide over vast, distant space!
    See the land from up high,
    So serene in the sky;
    Then find a secure hiding place.

  12. Tom Harris says:

    The Donald says he ought to reign
    From sea to sea, o’er waves of grain.
    But it makes me ill
    To hear his swill;
    I really doubt that man is sane.

  13. Karen Scandariato says:

    My thoughts on the current campaign
    To see which of the candidates reign
    While I don’t think she’s fair
    Honest, real or she cares
    Still it’s better than him, he’s insane!

  14. Tom Harris says:

    That day at the beach, I got burned,
    Lying in the sun unconcerned.
    As the gulls swooped down,
    They gathered around
    And left nary a stone unterned.

  15. Karen Scandariato says:

    I seldom feel noted or heard
    When offering wisdom of word
    If my prose is too much
    I’ll use gestures and such
    Perhaps next time I’ll flip you the bird

  16. Kirk Miller says:

    Note to Mad: Rain or Reign or Rein? Why not all three?

    These thunderstorms drive me insane,
    Cause flooding all over, a pain.
    They have seeded the sky
    In an effort to try
    To rein in the reign of the rain.

  17. Kirk Miller says:

    The mockingbirds constantly sing
    While mating each year in the spring.
    They chirp song after song
    Very loud all night long,
    ‘Til their necks I am ready to wring!

  18. Kirk Miller says:

    In my garden, the mockingbirds creep.
    Red tomatoes each day they do reap.
    It’s their garden café;
    To their friends they all say,
    “Get the early bird special; it’s cheep.”

  19. Brian Allgar says:

    (A variant on an old joke)

    At tea-time, the Queen would complain:
    “The tea-pot is empty again;
    I know that I filled it,
    But somehow I spilled it –
    I can’t pour, but I know how to reign.”

  20. Brian Allgar says:

    (And another old one resuscitated)

    She was walking alone in the rain
    When Count Dracula pounced. Oh, the pain!
    “No need for alarm,”
    He said, nibbling her arm,
    “I am just in a humerus vein”.

  21. Brian Allgar says:

    “Birdbrains” is an insult to birds.
    “Brexit” voters are brain-challenged nerds.
    Between me and you,
    Their collective IQ
    Doesn’t rate one of Donald Trump’s turds.

  22. Judith Block says:

    There is sunshine after the rain;
    Things glorious after mundane.
    Beyond tears comes a smile,
    Though it may take a while;
    Fresh serenity after the pain.

  23. Brian Allgar says:

    His Lordship had picked up a girl,
    And he paid her to give him a whirl.
    But next day, the poor chap
    Had contracted the clap –
    The wormy bird catches the Earl.

  24. Brian Allgar says:

    (A true story)

    I took my shoes back to complain
    That they’d fallen apart, but in vain.
    “Sir,” the salesman accused,
    “They’ve been badly ill-used –
    You’ve been wearing these shoes in the rain.”

  25. Brian Allgar says:

    “Your comment is awaiting moderation.”

    Eh? What on earth is that?

    From Mad Kane: You apparently used some word that my blogging software didn’t like. So instead of that limerick posting automatically, as usual, it was held back temporarily pending my manual approval. I approved it of course, but I don’t recall what word it was; it’s usually a word that’s popular with spammers.

  26. Randy Wagner says:

    The Habsburgs who ruled over Spain
    Were an inbreeding unsightly strain.
    Since their gene pool was rotten,
    Good looks weren’t begotten:
    In Spain on the plain fell the reign.

  27. Judith Block says:

    Edited version (please delete original).

    You have just washed the car? It will rain,
    On a picnic? It’s pouring again.
    The plants need the showers,
    It’s true, we love flowers.
    I guess it’s not smart to complain.

  28. Randy Wagner says:

    An adroit homing pigeon’s rapport
    With a woodpecker bloomed and they bore
    A bold nestful that roam
    But will always come home.
    On arrival, they’ll knock on the door.

  29. Dave Johnson says:

    A rewrite:

    Our nasty, old parrot named Gus
    Gets mixed-up when he starts to fuss.
    His squawks are amiss:
    “You can butt my kiss!”
    And he’s “crapping the kick” out of us.

  30. Kirk Miller says:

    When drizzling, wife likes to refrain
    From driving; she thinks it’s a pain.
    It’s a mist, no big deal.
    I’m behind the car’s wheel,
    A term that I call Driving Rain.

  31. There once was a young man from Drain
    Who said “I’m so sick of this rain
    I’m moving to Libya
    or maybe Namibia
    to live in deep desert terrain!”

    NB: Drain is the name of a real town in the Oregon Cascades.

  32. Said James: “It’s against my religion
    this calling the Rock Dove a ‘pigeon.’
    I’d never abide
    that the Audubon Guide
    refer to a teal as a wigeon!”

  33. Dave Johnson says:

    The red-tail was trying to best
    A flock of crows guarding their nest.
    It managed to nab
    An egg with a grab;
    Ensuring we’ll have one less pest.

  34. Randy Wagner says:

    Birdwatching, Lucretia LeClaire,
    With ignoble intentions, would stare
    At a red-headed pecker.
    This peeping nest-wrecker
    Enjoyed a wild pecker affair.

  35. Fred Bortz says:

    An Homage to a favorite song of my teen years, “The MTA” sung by the Kingston Trio. (But it doesn’t quite meet the “rain” requirement)

    Poor Charlie! If he had a brain,
    He wouldn’t have taken that train
    On that sad, fateful day
    That the damned MTA
    Raised the fare. There, he’s passing again!

  36. Lisi Nortman says:

    I’ve never witnessed such a campaign
    That appears to be so very profane
    He says she’s lying
    And he keeps on trying
    To strike her in the jugular vein

  37. Lisi Nortman says:


    I’ve never witnessed such a campaign
    Concerning who will ultimately reign
    He says she’s lying
    And he keeps on trying
    To strike her in the jugular vein

  38. Fred Bortz says:

    During the Romanovs’ reign,
    Rasputin was heard to complain,
    “That German guy, Marx,
    Is setting off sparks,
    And Vladimir Lenin’s a pain!”

  39. Fred Bortz says:

    The wheat farmer, desperate for rain,
    Lamented the drought and the pain.
    His word choice, unprayerful,
    In fact, ’twas quite swearful.
    The wrath of God went ‘gainst the grain.

  40. Fred Bortz says:

    This one’s for you, Mad!

    The Bernie bird seemed like a sign
    That for Sanders the stars would align,
    But the voters’ clear will
    Was to nominate Hill,
    Though his hard-liners still are denyin’.

  41. Lisi Nortman says:

    If in Spain it truly does rain
    The town folks should never complain
    Their flowers will grow
    And surely you know
    They always stay mainly in the plain

  42. Randy Wagner says:

    When t-shirts are dampened by rain,
    The contours of flesh become plain.
    If fabric’s transparent
    A spectator daren’t
    Gawk hard to steer clear of eyestrain.

  43. Lisi Nortman says:

    I can always depend on Jane
    Even though she is rather plain
    Her love knows no season
    And that is the reason
    She loves me come shine or come rain

  44. Lisi Nortman says:

    Not A Duplicate

    If in Spain it truly does rain
    The town folks should never complain
    Their flowers will grow
    And you’ll certainly know
    They will stay mainly in the plain

  45. Lisi Nortman says:

    My cat’s name is simply Jane
    My dog we call Mark Twain
    They vanished from sight
    As it turned to night
    Then came pouring down with the rain

  46. Ken Gosse says:

    Turkey Trot ~
    Turkeys who stand by the road’ll
    Cross quickly when scared by a yodel.
    Do chickens make fun
    Of these birds on the run?
    I’ve heard so, but that’s anecdotal.

  47. Ken Gosse says:

    Precipitant Persistence ~
    Most people who dance to make rain,
    Are considered inane or insane,
    Because many just stop
    Or they’ll dance ‘til they drop,
    But until the rain starts, it’s in vain.

  48. Ken Gosse says:

    A Close Shave ~
    The Dark Stormy Knight’s dreadful reign,
    Was uneven throughout his domain.
    The people all feared
    That mustachio and beard,
    But like Sampson, once waxed, he would wane.

  49. Ken Gosse says:

    Copy Writer ~
    A woman who swallowed a spider,
    Ended up with a bird deep inside her.
    She wrote, “How absurd,
    To swallow a bird,”
    But not first, so the rights were denied her.

  50. Ken Gosse says:

    The Portly Night Rider ~
    The guy had nine deer on his rein,
    And they knocked down my old weather vane.
    I yelled, “Who’ll clean my roof
    In the morning?” Then Poof!
    They were gone – just like legerdemain.

  51. Dave Johnson says:

    Our Pacific Northwest has the rain
    That sun-seekers curse out in vain.
    But advantages here
    Are abundantly clear;
    The results can be seen from a plane.

  52. Lisi Nortman says:

    Go away, go away damn rain
    Another day will make me insane
    The roof is leaking
    And the neighbors are peeking
    So Bob and I have to abstain

  53. Lisi Nortman says:

    Hillary’s trying to explain
    Some problems about her campaign
    Now Trump feels so smart
    And deep in his heart
    He thinks he’s as RIGHT as rain

  54. Lisi Nortman says:

    For Henry the 8th, there was much disdain
    His acts of cruelty were inhumane
    He beheaded the crimeless
    His cruelty was timeless
    He had no sense to come in out of the reign

  55. Lisi Nortman says:


    I can always depend on Jane
    Even though she is very plain
    Her HEART knows no season
    And that is the reason
    She loves me come shine or come rain

  56. Kirk Miller says:

    The birds incurred debts they did rue,
    And last week the bills had come due.
    In the morn, when they ate,
    They did not feel too great,
    ‘Cause the birds had their bills over dew.

  57. Barbara Millikan says:

    FOR THE EUGENE REIGN (women’s rugby team)

    Rough and rowdy Reign ruggers, the bane
    Of all other gal ruggers from Lane —
    When it poured like a flood
    All were buried in mud
    But no rain ever reined in the Reign

  58. Dave Johnson says:

    Cheers to Barbara M. and the Eugene Reign:

    Here in Bend, we don’t have as much rain
    As Eugene, since we’re on a high plain.
    But this we can do;
    We know how to brew
    So your ruggers can wash out the pain.

  59. Dave Johnson says:

    The Donald is making it plain;
    He thinks that he’s ready to reign.
    So what if he fails?
    From all the hat sales,
    His wallet is posting a gain.

  60. Lisi Nortman says:


    My cat’s name is simply Jane
    Our dog we call Chewie The Pain
    One stormy night
    They vanished from sight
    Then came gushing down with the pouring rain

  61. Kirk Miller says:

    Based on my personal experience:

    The gardener wore a big scowl,
    And emitted an ear-piercing howl.
    He had reason to gripe:
    Birds ate fruit that was ripe.
    ‘Twas a crime he considered most fowl.

    To tomatoes the birds had been treatin’
    Themselves. He refused to be beaten.
    Since the gardener’s wise,
    A nice plan he’ll devise
    To keep birds from his garden of eatin’.

    There is little expense he incurred.
    Get some net; make a tent; he’s insured
    That tomatoes are safe.
    While the mockingbirds chafe,
    He just smiles and then flips them the bird.

  62. Tim James says:

    A parrot, apparently spurred
    By an urge to repeat all he heard,
    Spent a night by the bed
    Of a gal. She turned red
    When “Oh God! Oh my God!” screamed the bird.

  63. Dave Johnson says:

    In Donald Trump speeches we’ve heard,
    Coherence is merely a word.
    Yet, thousands will gather,
    Enticed by his blather
    Derived from the brain of a bird.

  64. We saw a strange bird in the street.
    “That’s a Fake-Crested Trump,” muttered Pete.
    “How on earth can you tell?”
    I inquired. Pete said, “Well,
    It just let out a horrible Tweet.”

  65. My bird-watching uncle admits
    His blog would get millions of hits,
    Overwhelming his host
    Any time he would post
    New pictures of boobies and tits.

  66. Tim James says:

    The “election” of Bush was insane.
    And the will of the voters? In vain.
    Both his terms were a fizzle.
    Let’s call them a “drizzle,”
    The word for a very weak reign.

  67. Paul Muhlrad says:

    The assignment this week from Mad Kane
    Is to compose a limerick with “rain.”
    But hard as I try,
    I keep coming up dry.
    Yet another attempt down the tubes.

  68. Brian Allgar says:

    The row was about something absurd.
    I admit that I used the wrong word
    When I mocked how she talked,
    And complained that she squawked
    Like a parrot. She gave me the bird.

  69. Brian Allgar says:

    The bird-watcher peered through his glasses,
    Believing he’d seen in the grasses
    The movement of plovers.
    They proved to be lovers;
    He stared at two fine, naked asses.

    The girl quickly covered her bits
    With a towel, and yelled out “Hey, Fritz!
    What d’you think you are doing?”
    “Dear lady, I’m viewing
    A magnificent pair of Great Tits.”

  70. Ken Gosse says:

    The Silence of Wisdom, Limerick Version –
    Wise Old Owl ~ (traditional, a variation)
    A wise old owl sat in an oak,
    He heard more all the less that he spoke.
    “Open ears and large eyes,
    He must truly be wise.
    We should be more like him – that’s no joke.”
    Fishing for an Answer ~
    A wise old fish swam in a pond,
    He was silent, until from beyond,
    A hook hit the water.
    He now knows he aughter
    Have kept his mouth shut and not yawned.
    Brayzen Wisdom ~
    An old wise ass stood in the way,
    To make sure all heard what he’d say,
    He brayed very loud,
    And swayed most of the crowd,
    But the wisest folks just heard him bray.
    Silence is Olden ~
    An old man once sat in an Oak,
    Some thought, “What a wise, silent bloke.”
    Some said, “That’s absurd.
    He’s a looney old bird.”
    When the tree fell, none heard what he spoke.

  71. Suzanne Heymann says:

    Sometimes it just boggles the brain –
    The wisdom of queen bees that reign
    There’s no ‘king’ to cause wars
    Or make girls do the chores
    Or get drunk, drop their drawers or complain.

  72. Suzanne Heymann says:

    When a bird and a dog had a fight
    I could not tell who had the first bite
    But an eagle so regal
    Made off with a beagle
    Who’d eaten a seagull last night.

  73. Suzanne Heymann says:

    When the horse’s speed started to gain
    I gave a good tug on the rein
    Well the damn horse stopped dead
    And I flew overhead
    And the blood was so red! Oh the pain!

  74. Conservatives like to explain:
    When the rich have unlimited gain,
    Then Showers of Gold
    “Trickle down”, we are told…
    Keep telling yourself that it’s rain.

  75. The Orange-Faced Combover Bird
    Has plumage that’s truly absurd.
    Its mating call’s funny:
    (The sensible females demurred.)

  76. Barry Solomons says:

    There’s a lady in Key Biscayne
    Who liked to run nude in the rain,
    Saying she felt so much better
    As she got wetter and wetter
    And will be doing it again and again.


    An ostrich let out a big sigh
    And pleaded with God asking why,
    You would want me to stand
    With my head in the sand
    When I’d love to be able to fly.

  77. Lisi Nortman says:

    I cannot wait until tomorrow
    Halloween makes me forget my sorrow
    I’ve got the red cape
    I’m in very good shape
    My bird is dressing up as Zorro.

  78. Lisi Nortman says:

    Mad: I spelled ZORRO wrong!

    From MBK: Fixed.

  79. Kirk Miller says:

    There once was an Englishman, Dale,
    Desirous of getting some tail.
    Had his horniness cured
    By a young, nympho bird.
    He spent the entire night-in-Gail.

    William heard that a gal was quite loose,
    So he thought, “She’s a cinch to seduce.”
    He believed he’d go far
    With the chick at the bar,
    So he walked up and gave her a goose.

    She slipped off her pants with much ease,
    And spread open wide both her knees.
    “I’m really quite hot,”
    She said. “Rub my twat
    With both hands, and me you will please.”

    William started to rub horny Jill,
    But just then came her husband named Bill.
    William flipped him the bird.
    Husband’s wrath he incurred,
    And his actions were thus: whip-poor-Will.

    Middle finger Will upward did push,
    So got hit; lost two handfuls of tush.
    And I’m sure that you’ve heard
    That old saying: A bird
    In the hand is worth two in the bush.

    A lesson discovered herein,
    And much to poor William’s chagrin:
    You may think you are slick
    When you pick up a chick.
    If she’s wed, it’s a cardinal sin.

  80. Mark Kane says:

    Here’s a combo, using ‘Birds’ and ‘Rain’

    If you pause, you may hear without strain,
    The birds’ happy, wild chirping refrain.
    They are clearly excited,
    And no they can’t hide it,
    As they ready themselves for the rain.

  81. Lisi Nortman says:

    Many times I’m sure you’ve heard:
    My car window is full of turd!
    I have a solution
    For this appalling pollution:
    Mini diapers for approaching birds

  82. Dave Johnson says:

    The Donald and Boris together;
    Political birds of a feather.
    With ego and gall
    Setting course above all,
    Two hot-air balloons without tether.

  83. Lisi Nortman says:

    Superman flew high in the sky
    He collided with a creature and started to cry
    What is this being
    That I am seeing?
    It’s a Chat, Yellow breasted who spit in my eye

  84. Lisi Nortman says:


    For Henry the 8th, there was much disdain
    His acts of cruelty were inhumane
    He beheaded the crimeless
    His wickedness was timeless
    And he had not sense to come out of the reign

  85. Brian Allgar says:

    The Raven’s point of view

    Stupid Poe! It was frankly absurd;
    I was tired of hearing that word –
    “Nevermore! She is dead!”
    So I crapped on his head.
    You could say that I “gave him the bird.”

  86. Kirk Miller says:

    Mad: Please correct a typo in my July 3 entry. The fourth line’s first word should be spelled By instead of Buy. Thanx.

    From MBK: Done.

  87. Lisi Nortman says:

    If “Early Bird” doesn’t stop cacklin’
    I swear I’m gonna whack ’em
    Every morn
    I’m so forlorn
    From lack of sleep and relaxin’

  88. Kirk Miller says:

    Co-habiting birds saved a ton
    Of money and had lots of fun.
    The old adage is true,
    And you probably knew
    That toucan live as cheep as swan.

  89. Kathleen Bartoletti says:

    A Limerick writer named Kane
    Loved bathing out in the rain;
    When it started to fall
    She ran out, baring all
    And her washcloth, imported from Spain.

    * I hope this rhyme does not offend.
    That is not the thing I intend.
    I just saw it so plain,
    ” Kane”‘s a good rhyme for “rain”
    I could not help myself, in the end.

  90. Lisi Nortman says:

    If “Early Bird” doesn’t stop cacklin’
    I swear I’m gonna whack ’em
    I’m so forlorn
    In the morn
    From lack of sleep and NO relaxin’

  91. Bruce Alter says:

    Charlemagne had completed his reign
    Before Polo’s trans-Asia campaign.
    The King of the Franks
    Would’ve given Marc thanks,
    If he’d lived to have sampled chow mein.

  92. Tim James says:

    A limerick homage to “MacArthur Park”

    The cake got left out in the rain.
    And the recipe? Never again
    Will I have it, that’s true.
    (What’s that mean? Not a clue.
    Maybe drugs make the meaning more plain.)

  93. Mark Kane says:

    The talk in the town, “She’s Insane,”
    And they treat her with abject disdain,
    For her long naked walks,
    As everyone balks,
    But it’s cool hiking nude in the rain.

  94. Kirk Miller says:

    An insouciant owl, an old coot,
    Doesn’t care about others, says, “Shoot,
    This bird always weathers
    A flock’s ruffled feathers,
    ‘Cause you see, I just don’t give a hoot.”

    Didn’t know that a coot is a duck;
    Guess I’m having a string of bad luck.
    I was wrong, and to wit,
    A mistake I’ll admit.
    Does that mean that I’m just a dumb cluck?

    Or perhaps my misuse of some words
    Will encourage attacks by some nerds
    Who will have some good times
    As they mock all my rhymes,
    And they’ll say that they’re just for the birds.

    Irrespective of how my lims suck,
    I’ll continue to rhyme with much pluck.
    Hope my lims you don’t spurn
    When I take a wrong tern.
    If you do, I’ll just say, “What the . . . heck!”

  95. David Reddekopp says:

    For this contest, I’m going insane
    When I try for a verse that will reign
    But I can’t find the words
    So this one’s for the birds
    It’s my burden to be a birdbrain.

  96. David Reddekopp says:

    Yes, the bitch is a dog, we have heard
    But some people do not like that word
    So they’re bound to all balk
    When we talk of the cock
    Just relax, that’s the rooster – a bird.

  97. Kirk Miller says:

    There once was a bird lover, Bren,
    Who rescued a freezing young wren.
    When her husband would cuss,
    She would put up a fuss,
    And say, “Please, not in front of the chilled wren!”

  98. Suzanne Heymann says:

    There’s a singer whose song’s sad refrain
    Tells of love lost, the heartache, the pain
    What he does to disguise
    All the tears in his eyes
    Goes outside and he cries in the rain.

  99. Suzanne Heymann says:

    If stepping on spiders brings rain
    Then I’ll do it again and again
    I’ll go along with
    This wonderful myth
    ‘Cause I hate the damn bugs, they’re a pain!

  100. Suzanne Heymann says:

    Regal as she just may feign
    Elizabeth simply can’t reign
    It’s because all the power
    Got transferred, so our
    New government’s just as inane.

    Hey, how about that? It’s an acrostic!

  101. Suzanne Heymann says:

    Now if you plan to grow mary jane
    What does it need most – sun or rain?
    Well, I have to confess
    That I couldn’t care less
    ‘Cause its smell gives me stress; it’s a pain!

    That stuff is a big ball and chain
    So don’t give it a lot of free reign
    It’ll fry (like corn fritters)
    Your neurotransmitters
    Where daftness just litters your brain.

  102. Judith Block says:

    On life’s merry-go-round I see rain,
    Often sunshine, great joy; sometimes pain,
    Do I learn as I go?
    WilI I want to yell, “whoa!”
    When I reach that same spot again?

  103. Mark Kane says:

    Once disdained, gals are bra-less again.
    Not that I was a one to complain.
    The women wear T’s,
    To tight, but to please,
    And I smile as I wait for the rain.

  104. Suzanne Heymann says:

    What just fell against my window pane?
    Was that bird poop or fuel from a plane?
    Or from flying squirrels pissing?
    My glasses are missing
    Oh here they are; well, it’s just rain!

  105. Suzanne Heymann says:

    An old drunk who drank way too much sherry
    Looked in awe at his singing canary
    “Oh m’gosh, what the hell?
    Is that you, Tinkerbell?”
    All that booze made him see a winged fairy.

  106. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun two weeks of limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to our Limerick-Off Award Winner, the BIRD-Themed Limerick Winner, and to the Honorable Mention winners: Limerick-Off Winner 256.

    But you can still have limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Limerick-Off Bout.