Vive Vuvuzelas? Please, No!

I’m not exactly a sports aficionado. But I’m guessing it’s safe to presume that most games are expected to be noisy.

Apparently, though, South African soccer fans take such noise to a new ear-piercing level, enthusiastically blowing vuvuzelas in the stadiums. What’s a vuvuzela? Well, I know from oboes, but not from vuvuzelas. However, I’ve just learned they’re cacophonous, droning, deafening horns (blown like a brass instrument) that are driving TV World Cup viewers insane.

Vive Vuvuzelas? Please, No! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Attempting to watch World Cup soccer?
Then you’re likely to go off your rocker:
Vuvuzelas abound
With their loud, droning sound.
They are deafening. Help! Need a blocker!

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9 Responses to “Vive Vuvuzelas? Please, No!”

  1. Steve Bumgarner says:

    I understand the players on the field must be within 10 feet of each other to be able to communicate instructions. Kinda lack bein’ in tha pits at uh Sprint Cup race in Bristol, yanowotImean?. (LOOOOOOOOOUD!!!!!) Imagine traveling half way around the world to see the game you love with all your heart, paying exhorbitant prices for tickets, room, food, you name it and have to sit directly in front of one of these vuvu-yahoos. I’ve pissed away a lot of money in my day, but never anything like going to SA for the World Cup.

  2. Jesse Levy says:

    Must they give these vuvuzelas such a toot?
    These noisy things are not so cute
    they sound so damn loud
    and I’m not too proud
    To push the remote button that says Mute.

  3. Attempting to watch World Cup soccer?
    Then you heard the worst screech mocker,
    this obnoxious noise gripe
    makes pleasant, a bagpipe
    and calls for a well placed cow shocker

  4. Linkmeister says:

    Have you heard the vuvuzela?
    The thing sounds like the Acela
    It drones and it bleats
    The sound is no treat
    The fan, he is no happy fella

  5. I watched…and heard Brazil beat North Korea, 2 to 1. This is my limerick interpetation

    Listen to bagpipes loud droning
    add in some dying pigs groaning
    multiply that by ten
    and triple again,
    that’s vuvuzela’s sound your cloning.

  6. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    Not again, oh no, not vuvuzelas
    I shuddered: pure sound from he**! Was
    That my ears that fell off
    From the resounding cough
    Of the bellows blown by those young fellas?!

  7. Deb Bixler says:

    Great limerick. I did not even attempt to watch after the first 5 minutes of annoyance. To much stress. I am putting this article in the Best Blog Review Blog Carnival.

  8. Mrs4444 says:

    When in San FRancisco last week, we snapped a photo of a license plate holder that read: “My other car is a vulva.” LOLOLOL! Sorry, but the name of this post reminded me of that, and since you’re a humorist, I figured you’d enjoy it. :)

  9. This almost ruined the World Cup for me. I got used to it after a few games, but I wondered what thrill those fans were getting by blowing those horns the entire game and creating that constant droning blare.