1996 Humor Column About Underwear Shopping With My Mother

Thanks to all of you for your kind emails, comments, and Twitter tweets about my mother’s death. I really appreciate it!

In my mother’s honor, I’m posting a 1996 humor column she inspired during happier (and funnier) times:

Secret Shopper
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“I’m not going in there. No way. Forget it.”

My seventy-something mother’s stance was as rigid as her words; arms folded across her chest, unyielding legs pointed away from the shop I’d just suggested.

She and I had spent the entire afternoon combing through three department stores for the definitive pair of panties. Or at least my mom’s idea of same. This illusive undergarment had to be loose, comfortable, 100% cotton, and totally devoid of lace. And that was just for starters. It also had to completely cover my mother’s hips and come in a large size, the exact number of which she resolutely refused to disclose. … (Secret Shopper is continued here.)

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2 Responses to “1996 Humor Column About Underwear Shopping With My Mother”

  1. Joyce T. says:

    This so reminds me of all the shopping I do for my elderly mom. It took one year to find suitable socks. Now we’re on the shoes.

  2. Val says:

    I also called my mother ‘Ma’ but for us it wasn’t panties, but rather wallets, gloves and hats. I’m sorry for the loss of your parents and wish you all good things for 2009.