Dear Muse (Limerick)

October 29th, 2025

“I am sorry to say that I feel
Your ideas are far from ideal.
You’ve had plenty of time
To produce a good rhyme,
So this ‘muse’ deal must end. (It’s been real.”)

Inspiration Drummed Out? (Limerick)

October 22nd, 2025

“What’s that ruckus?” she said with a curse.
“I’m on deadline. It’s time to write verse.”
But just then, the noise grew
As a neighbor (on cue)
Banged his drums and began to rehearse.

I Can’t Stop My Rhyme (Limerick)

October 13th, 2025

I’m compelled to create ev’ry day.
No new lim’ricks? Remorse will hold sway.
Pressed for time? I still try
To write verse on the fly;
My frayed brain can’t keep rhyming at bay.

The Surly Chef (Limerick)

October 7th, 2025

When she spotted the dour chef’s glower,
The young baker-in-training would cower.
She was desp’rate to bail,
For he’d rail, “Sour! Stale!” …
And then shower the “culprit” with flour.

Don’t Sneeze At This Limerick

October 4th, 2025

When a comic expelled a loud sneeze,
His worn trousers fell down to his knees.
As he snatched them, he kvetched,
“Damn elastic’s too stretched,”
Adding “How did you like my striptease?”

Scrutiny Mutiny? (Limerick)

September 27th, 2025

Careful scrutiny’s key when you sign
Any contract. Each clause! Ev’ry line!
An attorney’s review
Is essential to do.
You forgo one? Don’t phone me to whine!

Yet Another Limerick Ode To Autumn

September 19th, 2025

Rumor has it that Fall’s coming soon.
Hate humidity? Autumn’s a boon.
But each season, of course,
Does have downsides, perforce:
Ev’ry Autumn, I sneeze till I swoon.

Stock Complaint (Limerick)

September 18th, 2025

Whined a woman, “I’m knee-deep in hock.
And I’m told that it’s time to take stock.
Not the ‘stock exchange’ kind;
That’s the source of my bind.
I’m behind cuz I fell for that crock!”

Wordy Limerick

September 9th, 2025

Certain words are so dull to their core,
They induce me to beg: “Please, no more!”
“Nonetheless” makes me sore.
I’ll go further — full bore:
Let’s take “furthermore.” Say it? I’ll snore!

A Class(ic) Tale? (Limerick)

September 6th, 2025

A fellow who longed to enhance
His chances at love and romance,
Took a ballroom dance class,
But did NOT meet a lass:
Only men who ALREADY could dance.

Prompt Confusion (Limerick)

September 5th, 2025

I adore using prompt words, and yet,
Their abundance, at times, makes me fret:
Word choice tears me to bits;
My brain freezes, then flits,
As by ADHD I’m beset.

A Fishy Limerick

August 31st, 2025

I’m amazed that my husband can eat
Canned sardines. (Hubby swears they’re a treat!)
Just a miniscule dose
Of their smell, oh so gross,
Makes me nauseous; NOT puking’s a feat!

Creativity Unawakened (Limerick)

August 22nd, 2025

I’m awakened; I’m eager to write.
But my thoughts are all scattered and trite.
“Where’d my muse go,” I cry.
“Has my wit-well gone dry?”
I scan prompts, sigh, and call it a night.

Haiku Switcheroo (Limerick)

August 17th, 2025

This limerick was inspired by a discussion on Bluesky about poets flouting haiku rules:

Haiku-Mavens have frequently said:
“Just get five-seven-five in your head.”
I do try — I’m no jerk!
But it often won’t work.
So I switch to a lim’rick instead.

Jumbled Limerick

August 7th, 2025

My poor brain is all jumbled. I’m wired.
I can’t sleep, though I’m terribly tired.
I just caught myself mumbling
Some rhyme words and grumbling.
In limerick fumbling I’m mired.

Porpoise-Full Limerick

July 29th, 2025

I researched some porpoise citations
On purpose. (I love derivations!)
Seems it comes from the French
Words for pig-fish — a wrench
In my “poor poise” assumption. (Damnations!)

The Dogged Winner (Limerick)

July 27th, 2025

For the record, this limerick is fictitious. (I grew up with poodles, mutts, and a collie, none of which ever participated in dog shows. And I’ve never owned a golden retriever.)

“I’m so proud of our golden retriever.
She’s a multiple ribbon receiver.
She struts proudly at shows
With great gait, well-arched toes;
An achiever and bold ‘eager beaver.'”

Olives? Please, NO!

July 26th, 2025

Empanadas can be quite delish.
But alas, many ruin that dish
With green olives, whose taste
Lays those meat pies to waste.
I would sooner eat three-week-old fish.

The Hoarder (Limerick)

July 25th, 2025

Keeping order’s impossibly hard
When your husband, a hoarder, stands guard
To ensure “priceless” crap’s
Not thrown out while he naps.
So my odds of success? Not one shard!

The “Musician” (Limerick)

July 17th, 2025

And odd woman careened and would preen,
As she rattled an old tambourine.
Irksome clatter? Immense!
And her moves made no sense!
So we swiftly skedaddled the scene.