{"id":9576,"date":"2013-06-28T18:45:10","date_gmt":"2013-06-28T22:45:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/?p=9576"},"modified":"2013-06-28T18:45:10","modified_gmt":"2013-06-28T22:45:10","slug":"mens-reproductive-health-bill-humor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/2013\/06\/28\/mens-reproductive-health-bill-humor\/","title":{"rendered":"A Modest Men’s Reproductive Health Reg Proposal (Limerick)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ohio State Sen. Nina Turner’s proposed bill regulating men’s reproductive health<\/a> inspired this multi-verse limerick:<\/p>\n

A Modest Men\u2019s Reproductive Health Reg Proposal (Limerick)
\nBy Madeleine Begun Kane<\/p>\n

Dear Republican men who insist
\nOn controlling gals’ bodies, we’re pissed.
\nSince what’s good for the goose
\n(It’s plain to deduce)
\nSuits the gander, I’ve drawn up this list:<\/p>\n

Viagra henceforth is restricted
\nTo those who can prove they’re afflicted
\nVia sex partner swearing
\nYou’re impotent, sharing
\nYour plight through oath uncontradicted.<\/p>\n

You must also sex therapy seek
\nTo help you reach sexual peak.
\nAnd we’ll force you to take
\nA stress test, you rake,
\nAnd prove that your heart isn’t weak.<\/p>\n

In addition, your doc must advise you
\nAbout celibacy and apprise you
\nIt’s a “viable choice.”
\nYes your doc must give voice
\nTo your options, cuz some may surprise you.<\/p>\n

Only then, will the state let your doc
\nPrescribe any meds for your cock.
\nAfter counsel advising
\nOf side effects rising
\nFrom ED pills — nothing to mock.<\/p>\n

From then on, you’ll be monitored too
\nTo make sure that your heart ain’t askew.
\nYou’ll be checked and re-tested.
\nThe state is invested
\nIn protecting you guys when you screw.<\/p>\n

If you think that such regs are intrusive,
\nInsulting, and even abusive,
\nAll these rules don’t compare
\nTo what women must bear:
\nFemale freedom is gravely elusive.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ohio State Sen. Nina Turner’s proposed bill regulating men’s reproductive health inspired this multi-verse limerick: A Modest Men\u2019s Reproductive Health Reg Proposal (Limerick) By Madeleine Begun Kane Dear Republican men who insist On controlling gals’ bodies, we’re pissed. Since what’s good for the goose (It’s plain to deduce) Suits the gander, I’ve drawn up this […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[182,1820,25,121,153,20,52,11,6,7,3,9,69],"tags":[2823,1755,2386,2385,838,839,1408,2130,2763,2777,2387,476,2389,2388,1230,2383,984,702,2384,328],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9576"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9576"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9576\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9585,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9576\/revisions\/9585"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9576"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9576"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/madness\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9576"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}