{"id":9711,"date":"2011-10-30T01:20:14","date_gmt":"2011-10-30T05:20:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=9711"},"modified":"2011-10-30T01:25:21","modified_gmt":"2011-10-30T05:25:21","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-33","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2011\/10\/30\/limerick-of-the-week-33\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (33)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off<\/a>. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:<\/p>\n

Congratulations to DAVID MCCORMICK a\/k\/a AdamantYves<\/a> who wins Limerick of the Week for this clever verse:<\/p>\n

A woman was telling a tale
\nOf a date with a flesh-grabbing male:
\n‘Told him, “You with the paws!
\n“Don’t go thinking because
\n“This date’s ‘blind’ it’s okay to use Braille!”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Robert Basler<\/a>, Bruce Niedt<\/a>, Emily a\/k\/a Looking For Roots<\/a>, Jane Shelton Hoffman, Ira Bloom, Robert Schechter, and Ruth Henson Feder. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Robert Basler:<\/p>\n

A fellow was telling a tale
\nOn his big application to Yale:
\nHe had biked across France,
\nTaught the lame how to dance,
\nAnd drunk rum from the real Holy Grail.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Bruce Niedt:<\/p>\n

A fellow was telling a tale
\nOf a wolf bite he got on the trail.
\n\u201cI\u2019ll feel much<\/b> better soon —
\nHey, is that the full moon?\u201d
\nNow he\u2019s growing a snout and a tail.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Emily a\/k\/a Looking For Roots:<\/p>\n

A fellow was telling a tale,
\nBut the plot had the pace of a snail.
\nHis friends all walked out,
\nAnd he started to pout
\n‘Cuz his whale of a tale was a fail.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Jane Shelton Hoffman:<\/p>\n

A woman was telling a tale
\nOf the crowds at an underwear sale.
\nShe pushed, shoved, and hit
\nJust for one bra that fit
\nAnd emerged much more perky, but pale.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Ira Bloom:<\/p>\n

A fellow was telling a tale,
\nOf a harlot he’d chanced to impale:
\n“I had this erection;
\nAlas! No protection!
\nNext I knew, I was lifting her veil.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Robert Schechter:<\/p>\n

A fellow was telling a tale
\nWhich he tried hard to peddle. No sale,
\nFor the folks in his state
\nLearned he’d gone on a date
\nThough he’d claimed he’d been hiking a trail.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Ruth Henson Feder:<\/p>\n

A woman was telling a tale
\n‘Bout a piss-poor excuse for a male
\nWho was three hours late
\nOn their very first date,
\nStiffed the bill, and was thrown into jail.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off<\/a>, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions: Congratulations to DAVID MCCORMICK a\/k\/a AdamantYves who wins Limerick of the Week for this clever verse: A […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[62,84,1983],"tags":[2374,2425,2535,2373,2281,5018,2280,2537,2536,487,523],"class_list":["post-9711","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-contests","category-limerick-award-winners","category-limerick-of-the-week","tag-bruce-niedt","tag-david-mccormick","tag-emily-aka-looking-for-roots","tag-ira-bloom","tag-jane-shelton-hoffman","tag-limerick-of-the-week","tag-robert-basler","tag-robert-schechter","tag-ruth-henson-feder","tag-writing-competitions","tag-writing-contest"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9711","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9711"}],"version-history":[{"count":71,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9711\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9883,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9711\/revisions\/9883"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9711"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9711"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9711"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}