{"id":42983,"date":"2020-07-04T17:18:37","date_gmt":"2020-07-04T21:18:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=42983"},"modified":"2020-07-05T16:16:34","modified_gmt":"2020-07-05T20:16:34","slug":"limerick-off-award-447","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2020\/07\/04\/limerick-off-award-447\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick-Off Award (447)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick-Off winners based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in the last Limerick-Off.<\/a> <\/p>\n

Congratulations to SJAAN VANDENBROEDER, who wins the Limerick-Off Award for this funny limerick:<\/p>\n

Assuming the posture of lotus,
\nBuddha lifted his voice to give notice:
\n\u201cYou may chant on this knoll
\nIf it pleases your soul \u2014
\nBut you\u2019re gone if your mantra is \u2018POTUS.’\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to STEVE BENKO,<\/a> who wins the Special WEAPON-Themed Limerick Award for this funny limerick:<\/p>\n

Said Lizzy, \u201cI\u2019m grabbing an axe,
\nAnd my mother I\u2019ll give 40 whacks.
\nThough that may seem uncouth,
\nI\u2019ve discovered the truth:
\nShe writes checks to Republican PACs.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Tim James, Sjaan VandenBroeder, Elaine Person<\/a>, Janice Power, Brian Allgar,<\/a> Dave Johnson, Tony Holmes, and Steve Benko.<\/a> Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

HONORABLE MENTIONS (“SOLE\/SOUL” RHYME DIVISION)<\/p>\n

Tim James:<\/p>\n

Asked the sage of his student: \u201cYoung soul,
\nHow is Donald J. Trump like a mole?\u201d
\nWell, the boy was wise too
\nAnd his answer was true:
\n\u201cBoth their heads are lodged deep in a hole.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Sjaan VandenBroeder:<\/p>\n

\u201cThough your homophones, Oscar, are droll,\u201d
\nMused Richard, \u201cthis piece on the whole…
\nWell, I like ti with bread,
\nBut a note \u2018pulling thread\u2019?
\nAny chance you might brighten up sol?\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Elaine Person:<\/p>\n

I just met a cool man named Cole,
\nWho played his guitar with great soul.
\nHe asked, \u201cDo you play?\u201d
\nI replied, \u201cIn what way?\u201d
\nFor I had a non-music goal.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Tim James:<\/p>\n

Many years from now, Trump bares his soul:
\n\u201cI regret that I lost all control.
\nI renounce my bad acts!\u201d
\nBut it\u2019s time to face facts:
\nThere\u2019s no WAY that he\u2019s making parole.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Janice Power:<\/p>\n

Making devil\u2019s food cake was her goal;
\nOn her fate, though, it took quite a toll.
\nFor this offer she took
\nFrom the demon\u2019s cookbook:
\n\u201cFor my recipe, sell me your soul.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Brian Allgar:<\/p>\n

The fish swam around in a shoal.
\nGod was angry, and told them: \u201cYour role
\nShould be worshipping Me!\u201d
\nThey said: \u201cAs you can see,
\nWe\u2019re sardines, and we don\u2019t have a sole.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Sjaan VandenBroeder:<\/p>\n

Three fiddlers who knew Old King Cole,
\nScoffed, \u201cTHIS guy? A merry old soul?
\nYou should see what an ass
\nHe can be without grass,
\nSo we fill up his pipe and his bowl.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Brian Allgar:<\/p>\n

Since \u201cGod\u2019s Chosen One\u201d is his role,
\nWell, of course Donald Trump has \u201ca soul.\u201d
\nBut there\u2019s one little twist:
\nTheologians insist
\nThat it should be pronounced as \u201casshole.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Dave Johnson:<\/p>\n

Some researchers have a new goal:
\nDetermine if Trump has a soul.
\nOne summed it up best:
\n\u201cIt\u2019s an arduous quest;
\nWe\u2019re combing a bottomless hole.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Tony Holmes:<\/p>\n

In denial, Dad spurned self-control,
\nAnd repeatedly loaded his bowl;
\nBut it wasn\u2019t the fries
\nThat secured his demise,
\nBut a hook that was left in the sole.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

HONORABLE MENTIONS (WEAPONS LIMERICK DIVISION)<\/p>\n

Sjaan VandenBroeder:<\/p>\n

There\u2019s a reason I\u2019ve no wish to trifle
\nWith the likes of a pistol or rifle:
\nMy aim\u2019s more impressive
\nWhen passive-aggressive.
\n(More conspicuous urges, I stifle.)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Steve Benko:<\/p>\n

Said Oog, \u201cMe go hunt now with spear.\u201d
\nBut his wife said, \u201cYou full of lies, dear.
\nWhat you call \u2018business trip\u2019
\nIs excuse; I am hip
\nTo what means your Neanderthal leer.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off<\/a>, which gives you yet another opportunity to win the Limerick-Off Award.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick-Off winners based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in the last Limerick-Off. Congratulations to SJAAN VANDENBROEDER, who wins the Limerick-Off Award for this funny limerick: Assuming the posture of lotus, Buddha lifted his voice to give notice: \u201cYou may chant on this knoll If it pleases […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[62,104,84,3270,1192,1983,65,42,103],"tags":[4003,4465,5390,5391,5009,5018,5343,5080,3167,5145,487,523],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42983"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=42983"}],"version-history":[{"count":17,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42983\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":43004,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42983\/revisions\/43004"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=42983"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=42983"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=42983"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}