{"id":37112,"date":"2016-05-15T01:02:41","date_gmt":"2016-05-15T05:02:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=37112"},"modified":"2016-05-15T01:13:22","modified_gmt":"2016-05-15T05:13:22","slug":"limerick-off-award-252","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2016\/05\/15\/limerick-off-award-252\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick-Off Award (252)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick-Off winners based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in the last Limerick-Off<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Congratulations to BRIAN ALLGAR, who wins the Limerick-Off Award for this funny limerick:<\/p>\n

Said the dentist, \u201cYour teeth need a brace,
\nBut I fear it\u2019s a difficult case.
\nThough the work is cosmetic,
\nIt needs anaesthetic —
\nYou\u2019ll feel a small prick in your face.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to WILL T. LAUGHLIN<\/a>, who wins the Special STUBBORNNESS-Themed Limerick Award for this funny limerick:<\/p>\n

I am fed up with people who choose
\nTo be stubborn \u2014 who can\u2019t change their views.
\nI\u2019m telling you flat
\nI will NOT be like that.
\nI refuse, I refuse, I REFUSE!!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Allen Wilcox, Judith H. Block,<\/a> Brian Allgar, Carolyn Henly, Will T. Laughlin<\/a>, Randolph Wagner, Jeanine Silverio,<\/a> Tim James, David Reddekopp, and Dave Johnson. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

HONORABLE MENTIONS (“CASE” RHYME DIVISION)<\/p>\n

Allen Wilcox:<\/p>\n

Good limerick writing\u2019s a race
\nTo a sadly anonymous place.
\nPerhaps I should mention
\nTo get more attention,
\nI\u2019ve decided to use UPPER CASE.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Judith H. Block: <\/p>\n

Dear Jury, this trial’s a disgrace.
\nMy client was not at that place.
\nHe was busy in bed,
\nAs the Judge’s wife said.
\nSo thus I do now rest my case!\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Brian Allgar:<\/p>\n

The coffin took up lots of space,
\nBut he gave it a prominent place.
\n\u201cThough my wife is no more,
\nShe has fooled me before,
\nSo I keep her around just in case.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Carolyn Henly:<\/p>\n

There once was a fishwife who\u2019d race
\n\u2019Round her shop guarding ev’ry glass case.
\nIf you hear the old trout
\nGive a shout, best get out
\nOr she\u2019ll chase you all over the plaice.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Will T. Laughlin’s SLOUCHING TOWARD CLEVELAND (written before everyone dropped out except Trump)<\/p>\n

\nThe candidates left in the race
\nPromise terrible things to their base.
\nBut forget about tact:
\nThey\u2019re ignoring the fact
\nThat they can\u2019t just make laws by ukase.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Randolph Wagner:<\/p>\n

Sherlock’s fetishes swayed every case
\nAs he sleuthed and prepared to give chase.
\n“‘The game is afoot!’
\nIs extremely well put,”
\nQuipped this bootlicking wearer of lace.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

HONORABLE MENTIONS (STUBBORNNESS LIMERICK DIVISION)<\/p>\n

Brian Allgar’s Stubbornness of Sisyphus: <\/p>\n

He was rolling a rock up a hill,
\nBut the bloody thing wouldn\u2019t keep still.
\nIt would roll down again \u2013
\nWhat a bore, what a pain! \u2013
\nRock and roll was a pastime worth nil.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Jeanine Jamero Silverio: <\/p>\n

\nI\u2019ve the typical Taurean pique
\n(Also known as a mean stubborn streak).
\nOnce my way is revealed,
\nI\u2019ll hold fast and not yield.
\nIt\u2019s just part of my bullish mystique.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Tim James:<\/p>\n

He\u2019s not stubborn, he’s \u201cprincipled.\u201d See?
\nNot obsessed, \u201claser-focused\u201d is he.
\nIt\u2019s the same old refrain:
\nLife involves much less pain
\nWhen it\u2019s viewed euphemistically.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

David Reddekopp:<\/p>\n

I\u2019m as stubborn as stubborn can be.
\nShow me proof and aloofly, I flee.
\nNo concessions to science,
\nNo facts, just defiance–
\nThat\u2019s why I remain YEC*.<\/p>\n

*Young Earth Creationist.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Dave Johnson:<\/p>\n

He refuses to honor their wishes
\nAnd scale back the garbage he dishes.
\nThe pathway\u2019s now clear
\nFor the ending they fear:
\nTheir party will swim with the fishes.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off<\/a>, which gives you yet another opportunity to win the Limerick-Off Award.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick-Off winners based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in the last Limerick-Off. Congratulations to BRIAN ALLGAR, who wins the Limerick-Off Award for this funny limerick: Said the dentist, \u201cYour teeth need a brace, But I fear it\u2019s a difficult case. Though the work is cosmetic, It […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[62,84,3270,1192,1983,65,42],"tags":[4107,4003,3197,4465,4525,4764,3570,5009,5018,4763,3167,3543,487,523],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37112"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=37112"}],"version-history":[{"count":53,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37112\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":37316,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37112\/revisions\/37316"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=37112"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=37112"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=37112"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}