{"id":33483,"date":"2015-08-08T23:24:23","date_gmt":"2015-08-09T03:24:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=33483"},"modified":"2015-08-08T23:34:01","modified_gmt":"2015-08-09T03:34:01","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-225","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2015\/08\/08\/limerick-of-the-week-225\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (225)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Congratulations to PEDRO POITEVIN<\/a>, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:<\/p>\n

\nHaving nervously downed our Bordeaux,
\nWe faced off: \u201cYou go first.\u201d \u201cNo, you go.\u201d
\nBut she said: \u201cDon\u2019t be dunces,
\nTwo fellows at once is
\nSo much better than two in a row.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Judith H. Block<\/a>, Andy Bassett<\/a>, Phyllis Sterling Smith a\/k\/a Granny Smith<\/a>, Adam Stern<\/a>, Tim James, Dave Johnson, Kirk Miller, Allen Wilcox, and David Reddekopp. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Judith H. Block:<\/p>\n

The bowling pins lined in a row,
\nI beam with a warm, hopeful glow.
\nThen I curse and I mutter\u2013
\nBalls land in the gutter.
\nBut at least they have spared my big toe!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Andy Bassett:<\/p>\n

Maid Marian was out for a row
\nWith her man (Robin Hood, don\u2019t you know)
\nWhen the Sheriff of Nottingham
\nStarted potshotting \u2019em.
\nShe was saved by her arrow and beau.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Phyllis Sterling Smith:<\/p>\n

I like to eat fresh salmon roe
\nFrom the currents that here about flow,
\nBut to all males astride
\nOf the stream, side to side,
\nPlease don\u2019t yield to the urge to let go.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Adam Stern:<\/p>\n

Arnold Schoenberg endeavored to show
\n(With recruits Berg and Webern in tow)
\nThat one COULD bid adieu
\nTo C major, in lieu
\nOf a systematized twelve-tone row.<\/p>\n

His creations were critically flayed
\nAnd left listeners vexed and dismayed,
\nPrompting Schoenberg to vow,
\n\u201cIf my rows cause a row,
\n\u201cIt\u2019s not THEIR fault \u2013 they\u2019re shoddily played!\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Tim James:<\/p>\n

Cute Joanna, a Sigma Pi Rho,
\nGave a frat boy the ol\u2019 to-and-fro.
\nBut she drank too much beer,
\nLeft behind her brassiere.
\nSo the guy woke to two cups of Jo.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Dave Johnson:<\/p>\n

A muscular fellow named Roe
\nHad a body he wanted to show.
\nAt a nudist resort,
\nHe\u2019s proud to report
\nHis willy left Millie aglow.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Kirk Miller:<\/p>\n

At the river, I think you should know
\nThere are preschoolers lurking below.
\nThey are probably not
\nWhat you think, if you thought
\nThey are children, because they are roe.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Allen Wilcox:<\/p>\n

A lesson, for any new pro,
\nYou should follow wherever you go —
\nTo not hear the words,
\n\u201cYour plan\u2019s for the birds,\u201d
\nYour should get all your ducks in a row.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

David Reddekopp:<\/p>\n

Some enjoy Henry David Thoreau
\nOr Dickinson, Whitman, or Poe.
\nI\u2019m also a poet
\nThough they\u2019ll never know it.
\nDid THEY compose limericks? No!<\/p>\n

Take your sorry-ass stanzas and go,
\nIf you can\u2019t post five lines in a row
\nThat follow this scheme
\nWhatever the theme,
\nBut these bards set the bar way too low.<\/p>\n

Hey Thoreau, don\u2019t you think that you owe
\nUs a limerick? It\u2019s apropos,
\nAnd they could\u2019ve been spawned
\nAt your famed Walden Pond
\nWhile you struggled through seaweed and roe.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off<\/a>, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to PEDRO POITEVIN, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: Having nervously downed our Bordeaux, We faced off: \u201cYou go first.\u201d \u201cNo, you go.\u201d But she said: \u201cDon\u2019t […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[62,84,1192,1983,65,42],"tags":[4549,4107,4389,4465,4525,3570,3284,5009,5018,4538,2046,3167,487,523],"class_list":["post-33483","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-contests","category-limerick-award-winners","category-limerick-contest","category-limerick-of-the-week","category-limerick-writing-contest","category-limericks","tag-adam-stern","tag-allen-wilcox","tag-andy-bassett","tag-dave-johnson","tag-david-reddekopp","tag-judith-h-block","tag-kirk-miller","tag-limerick-contest","tag-limerick-of-the-week","tag-pedro-poitevin","tag-phyllis-sterling-smith","tag-tim-james","tag-writing-competitions","tag-writing-contest"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33483","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33483"}],"version-history":[{"count":46,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33483\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":33576,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33483\/revisions\/33576"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33483"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33483"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33483"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}