{"id":31380,"date":"2015-03-21T22:30:20","date_gmt":"2015-03-22T02:30:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=31380"},"modified":"2015-03-21T22:39:04","modified_gmt":"2015-03-22T02:39:04","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-206","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2015\/03\/21\/limerick-of-the-week-206\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (206)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Congratulations to BRIAN ALLGAR, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been lost in the desert all day,
\nAnd my clothes are beginning to fray.
\nNow the vulture team dips,
\nAnd they\u2019re smacking their lips
\nAs the biggest one quips \u201cLet us prey.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Will T. Laughlin<\/a>, Kevin Ahern<\/a>, Brian Allgar, Fred Bortz<\/a>, Dave Johnson, and Byron Ives. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Will T. Laughlin:<\/p>\n

Those folks cause my temper to fray,
\nWho claim it\u2019s a choice to be gay.
\nBut I\u2019ll lower my voice:
\nBeing dumb is no choice,
\nAnd you can\u2019t pray the Stupid away.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Kevin Ahern: <\/p>\n

A sex-changing Swede in the fray
\nSaid the surgery all went OK.
\nThis ex-woman wrote
\nIn a notable quote
\n\u201cI sure wasn\u2019t Bjorn yesterday.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Brian Allgar:<\/p>\n

The skydiver found with dismay
\nThat his chute was beginning to fray.
\nIt was no use at all
\nWhen he entered free fall,
\nAnd he ended his dive as pur\u00e9e.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Fred Bortz: <\/p>\n

I’ve been watching my good nature fray
\nAs climate deniers delay.
\nThat Tea Party faction
\nBlocks government action.
\nAll we need, they profess, is to pray.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Dave Johnson:<\/p>\n

He insisted on having his way,
\nAnd her nerves were beginning to fray.
\nSo she said \u201cOK, fine
\nThen you pick the wine;
\nBut please, no more boxed Chardonnay!\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Byron Ives:<\/p>\n

We met at a Waikiki fray.
\nI fetched us Mai Tais right away.
\nShe said with a wink,
\n\u201cGee, thanks for the drink.
\nI suppose you\u2019re expecting a lei?\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to STEVE WHITRED<\/a>, who wins a special Limerick Saga Award, occasionally given to a clever multi-verse limerick.<\/p>\n

\n

Does the thought of a nuclear fray
\nOn your mind ever heavily weigh?
\nTo allay your concern
\nIt might help if you learn
\nFrom a story I\u2019d like to convey.<\/p>\n

We were close, in a land far away
\nTo a plan that Iran would obey.
\nBut before they could sign
\nThe proverbial line
\nJunior Cotton stepped into the fray.<\/p>\n

Cotton\u2019s hope was to cause a delay
\nOr to side-track, unsettle, and fray
\nGlobal nuclear talks
\nWhile congressional hawks
\nRattle sabers and bluster and bray.<\/p>\n

Junior Cotton contends by the way
\nThat the presidency is pass\u00e9,
\nThat a deal with \u2018The Chief\u2019
\nWould be worthless and brief
\nAnd in statecraft the Senate holds sway.<\/p>\n

But his stupid seditious display
\nCaused the Tea Party caucus to fray.
\nAnd while they\u2019re walking back
\nHis subversive attack
\nSaner statesmen will Kerry the day.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off,<\/a> which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to BRIAN ALLGAR, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: I\u2019ve been lost in the desert all day, And my clothes are beginning to fray. Now the vulture […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[62,84,1192,1983,65,42],"tags":[4003,3971,4465,3523,3499,5009,5018,3342,3543,487,523],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31380"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=31380"}],"version-history":[{"count":71,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31380\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":31516,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31380\/revisions\/31516"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=31380"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=31380"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=31380"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}