{"id":27073,"date":"2014-07-13T01:55:24","date_gmt":"2014-07-13T05:55:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=27073"},"modified":"2014-07-13T02:08:12","modified_gmt":"2014-07-13T06:08:12","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-172","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2014\/07\/13\/limerick-of-the-week-172\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (172)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off.<\/a> <\/p>\n

Congratulations to KONRAD SCHWOERKE, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:<\/p>\n

The barkeep’s wife, Tilley, I’d drill
\nEv’ry chance I could get — what a thrill!
\nBut I took it too far
\nHaving sex in the bar;
\nI got caught with my hand in his Till.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to JON GEARHART, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for this limerick which received the most Facebook “likes.”<\/p>\n

Okay ladies, you know the drill:
\nNo diaphragm, condom, or pill
\nWill be bought by employers
\nWho have the best lawyers
\nLike Hobbyin’ Lobbyists will.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Tim James, Allen Wilcox, Kathy El-Assal, Brian Allgar, Colleen Murphy<\/a>, Fred Bortz<\/a>, and Byron Ives. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Tim James: <\/p>\n

My hillbilly gal knew the drill;
\nShe would make the best moonshine until
\nFed’ral agents one day
\nCame and took her away.
\nNow she\u2019s gone, and I yearn for her still.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Allen Wilcox:<\/p>\n

The delegates \u2013 they knew the drill.
\nAs they lined up to sign, they were still.
\nTo declare they were free,
\nWhich soon they would be,
\nThey stood tall and were all dressed to quill.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Kathy El-Assal: <\/p>\n

In cat houses, girls know the drill:
\nIt’s giving their clients a thrill.
\nWith mirrors revealing
\nWhat clothes were concealing,
\nThe need for blue pills will be nil.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Brian Allgar: <\/p>\n

Said Shakespeare \u201cThou knowest the drill.
\n\u2019Tis said every Jack shall have Jill.
\n\u2019Twixt thy legs I shall lay me —
\nSeek not to gainsay me,
\nFor where there\u2019s a way, there\u2019s a Will.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Colleen Murphy:<\/p>\n

The young man repeated the drill
\nHe did with incredible skill.
\n(He perfected this knowledge
\nBy going to college.)
\nPour the beer, chug it down, then refill.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Fred Bortz: <\/p>\n

The surgeon perfected the drill.
\nHe made each incision with skill.
\nHe created a hole
\nWhere there once was a pole,
\nAnd Ms. Willa was no longer Bill.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Byron Ives:<\/p>\n

In boot camp, Will sure knew the drill.
\nTo shoot on the range was a thrill.
\nHe\u2019d never been shot,
\nBut it made his sack taut
\nWhen the sergeant yelled, \u201cFIRE AT WILL!\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off,<\/a> which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to KONRAD SCHWOERKE, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: The barkeep’s wife, Tilley, I’d drill Ev’ry chance I could get — what a thrill! But I took […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[62,84,3270,1192,1983,65,42],"tags":[4107,4003,3971,2525,3523,3727,2543,2538,5009,5018,3167,487,523],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27073"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=27073"}],"version-history":[{"count":45,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27073\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":27183,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27073\/revisions\/27183"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=27073"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=27073"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=27073"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}