{"id":26342,"date":"2014-05-31T22:00:07","date_gmt":"2014-06-01T02:00:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=26342"},"modified":"2014-05-31T22:57:50","modified_gmt":"2014-06-01T02:57:50","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-166","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2014\/05\/31\/limerick-of-the-week-166\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (166)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Congratulations to SCOTT CROWDER, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:<\/p>\n

A woman whose hair is all mussed
\nAvows that the wind is robust,
\nThough everyone sees
\nBy the dirt on her knees,
\nIt was caused by a blow, not a gust.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to CHRIS DOYLE, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for two limericks, each of which received the most Facebook “likes.”<\/p>\n

In school, the three R’s were a must,
\nBut at ‘rithmetic I was a bust.
\nMy subtracting is fine,
\nBut when adding, like 9
\nAnd 16, I get somehow nonplussed.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

and<\/p>\n

The Tin Man, like everyone, must
\nMeet his Maker and wind up as dust,
\nBut unlike you and me,
\nOn his stone “R.I.P.”
\nWill denote it’s in peace that he’ll rust.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Fred Bortz<\/a>, Sue Dulley, Brian Allgar, Robert Basler<\/a>, Robert Schechter, Johanna Richmond, Kirk Miller, Konrad Schwoerke, and Shannon Tucker<\/a>. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Fred Bortz: <\/p>\n

The couple emerged very mussed
\nFrom a tryst that had sated their lust.
\nThey enjoyed S and M,
\nHe informed us: “Ahem,
\nYes she is the one that I trussed.”\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Sue Dulley:<\/p>\n

Some weeks I decide that I must
\nStop yielding to limerick lust.
\nThen a quick look, and — yikes —
\nSo many rate “Likes.”
\nMy resolve soon dissolves into dust.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Brian Allgar: <\/p>\n

Inga\u2019s clothes were disheveled and mussed;
\nThe wife found her husband and cussed:
\n\u201cI have told you before,
\nThe au pair\u2019s not a whore,
\nSo you\u2019ve not paid her this time, I trust!\u201d\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Robert Basler: <\/p>\n

A vat of stomped grapes is called must.
\nWithout it, your wine would go bust.
\nSo squish all that pinot
\nAnd make us some vino.
\nWho knows? It could lead to some lust!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Robert Schechter: <\/p>\n

On every piano there must
\nBe a dignified Beethoven bust
\nTo look down its nose
\nAt the tunes you compose
\nAnd to shoot you a look of disgust.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Johanna Richmond: <\/p>\n

On my birthday it’s hard but I must
\nWear a grin and disguise my disgust.
\nThough I’m glad to get older,
\nThe ache in my shoulder
\nIs putting a crimp in my lust.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Kirk Miller:<\/p>\n

The man\u2019s horny and knows that he must
\nTell his wife that he\u2019s feeling much lust.
\nIf his wife\u2019s in the mood,
\nHe\u2019ll suggest something lewd
\nAnd then hope that his wife gets his thrust.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Konrad Schwoerke: <\/p>\n

There once was a camel in must
\nWho could not quench the heat of his lust.
\nIn that hot desert setting,
\nWith limited sweating,
\nThe beastie was quick to combust.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Shannon Tucker:<\/p>\n

“Good grades are an absolute must!”
\nThey say throughout school, but I just
\nDon’t think that mere grades
\nWill reward you in spades:
\nBetter, grades and a double D bust.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Konrad Schwoerke:<\/p>\n

Before there is wine there is must.
\nBefore there is love there is lust.
\nThis linear flow
\nIs everywhere, so
\nBefore there are bunnies there’s dust.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off,<\/a> which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to SCOTT CROWDER, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: A woman whose hair is all mussed Avows that the wind is robust, Though everyone sees By the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[62,84,1192,1983,65,42],"tags":[4003,3116,3523,2065,3284,2538,5009,5018,2280,2537,2223,4116,3369,487,523],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26342"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=26342"}],"version-history":[{"count":50,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26342\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26455,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26342\/revisions\/26455"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=26342"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=26342"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=26342"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}