{"id":24831,"date":"2014-02-23T00:38:34","date_gmt":"2014-02-23T04:38:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=24831"},"modified":"2014-02-23T17:23:46","modified_gmt":"2014-02-23T21:23:46","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-153","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2014\/02\/23\/limerick-of-the-week-153\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (153)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Congratulations to BRIAN ALLGAR, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:<\/p>\n

A caveman would give her a knock
\nOn the head with a stone or a crock,
\nNo romantic palaver …
\nToday, we are suaver,
\nAnd stun them with Tiffany rock.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to Chris Doyle, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for these three limericks, each of which received the most Facebook “likes.” (Yes, Chris is in a three-way tie with himself.)<\/p>\n

Chris Doyle: <\/p>\n

At midnight there came a strange knock,
\nA tap-tapping that rattled the lock.
\n‘Twas a crow at the door
\nOf my store to implore
\nThat I keep Poe’s “The Raven” in stock.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Chris Doyle: <\/p>\n

As you’re surfing online, there’s a knock
\nAt the door, then a shout, “Break the lock!”
\nIt’s the Feds, who suppose
\nYou make bombs since you chose
\nAs your tag “the nuke kid on the block.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Chris Doyle: <\/p>\n

My joke, which begins with “Knock, knock,”
\nPrompts your question “Who’s there?” and then shock
\nWhen my “Ivan” to you
\nMakes you ask, “Ivan who?”
\nAnd I say: “Ivan EighteenInchCock.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Jane Shelton Hoffman, Ailsa McKillop, Steve Whitred<\/a>, Charley Simmons, Fred Bortz<\/a>, and Will T. Laughlin<\/a>. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Jane Shelton Hoffman: <\/p>\n

A dog who had learned how to knock
\nWould stop at each door on his block.
\nHe knew not to beg,
\nSo he’d just lift his leg
\nAnd if given a treat, no wet sock!\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Ailsa McKillop: <\/p>\n

The circle all heard a loud knock.
\nCried their leader (in black trailing frock):
\n“Oh spirit, pray speak!”
\nTo her left was a shriek.
\nThat latecomer caused quite a shock.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Steve Whitred: <\/p>\n

In Boston a drug cop’s a ‘nawc’
\nAnd a prank or a spree is a ‘lawk.’
\nAll the dogs are baroque.
\nThis I swear is no joke:
\nAt the moon they don’t howl, they just ‘Bach.’<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Charley Simmons: <\/p>\n

A sailor gal heard a loud knock.
\nAt the door, she was in for a shock.
\nFor a flasher was there.
\nHe was smiling and bare,
\nSo she tied a square knot on his cock.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Fred Bortz: <\/p>\n

At the s\u00e9ance when I heard the knock,
\nI was sure it was charlatan schlock.
\nThen the medium, small,
\nLoomed quite large after all,
\nWhen my late Granny started to talk.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Will T. Laughlin: <\/p>\n

You open the door to the knock:
\nIt\u2019s a skeleton holding a clock.
\nIt hits you (too late)
\nAs you go to your Fate
\nThat you ought to have gone to the Doc.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to BRIAN ALLGAR, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: A caveman would give her a knock On the head with a stone or a crock, No romantic […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[62,84,1192,1983,65,42],"tags":[3559,4003,3420,3116,3523,2281,5009,5018,3342,3543,487,523],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24831"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=24831"}],"version-history":[{"count":43,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24831\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":24935,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24831\/revisions\/24935"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=24831"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=24831"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=24831"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}