{"id":23164,"date":"2013-11-10T01:01:11","date_gmt":"2013-11-10T05:01:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=23164"},"modified":"2013-11-10T01:17:02","modified_gmt":"2013-11-10T05:17:02","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-139","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2013\/11\/10\/limerick-of-the-week-139\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (139)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Congratulations to Scott Crowder, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:<\/p>\n

A woman who frequently strips
\nIn CGI video clips
\nWill steal all your cache,
\nAnd your hard drive will crash
\nFrom her implanted silicon chips.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to Chris Doyle, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for this limerick which received the most Facebook “likes.”<\/p>\n

A nimble ecdysiast strips,
\nCrosses hands as she bends at the hips,
\nGrabs her feet, and then hears
\nThe topologists’ cheers
\nAt the M\u00f6bius championships.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Tim James, Jamie Hutchinson, Chris Doyle, Ira Bloom, Will T. Laughlin<\/a>, Craig Dykstra, and David Lefkovits a\/k\/a Dr. Goose<\/a>. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Tim James:<\/p>\n

Said a woman who frequently strips
\nTo a man who tried fondling her nips:
\n\u201cWhen my clothing I doff
\nYou just keep your hands off!\u201d
\nWith that concept he can\u2019t come to grips.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Jamie Hutchinson:<\/p>\n

My bathroom needs anti-skid strips,
\nA safety mat, grab bars, and grips.
\nGotta write down that list
\nBecause — you get the gist —
\nMy other head\u2019s memory slips.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Chris Doyle: <\/p>\n

A young nymphomaniac strips
\nAs her therapist watches, then quips,
\n“See that couch over there?
\nGo lie down and prepare
\nFor your very first Freudian’s lips.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Ira Bloom: <\/p>\n

A mohel, while pealing some strips,
\nDuring bris, is well known for his quips:
\n“For cheap circumcision,
\nThere’s lots of derision.
\nI mostly just work for the tips.”\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Will T. Laughlin:<\/p>\n

I know of a rose bush that strips
\nEach night for the aphids and thrips.
\nYou\u2019ll say, \u201cWill\u2019s lost his mind;
\nBushes can\u2019t bump and grind!\u201d
\nWell, rose bushes can. They\u2019ve got hips.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Craig Dykstra:<\/p>\n

She seeks men at the club where she strips,
\nTo indulge her asphyxiate trips.
\nShe says “Here’s what you do:
\nGrasp my throat ’til I’m blue.”
\nYes, she really likes coming to grips.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

David Lefkovits: <\/p>\n

A woman who frequently strips
\nWas a dancer for stock market tips.
\nWhile she’d shake and she’d shimmy,
\nA trader named Jimmy
\nWould say what to buy on the dips.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off<\/a>, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to Scott Crowder, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: A woman who frequently strips In CGI video clips Will steal all your cache, And your hard drive […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[62,84,1192,1983,65,42],"tags":[3116,2690,2047,2373,3073,5009,5018,2223,3167,3543,487,523],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23164"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23164"}],"version-history":[{"count":38,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23164\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":23294,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23164\/revisions\/23294"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23164"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23164"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23164"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}