{"id":22913,"date":"2013-10-27T00:03:24","date_gmt":"2013-10-27T04:03:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=22913"},"modified":"2013-10-27T00:11:56","modified_gmt":"2013-10-27T04:11:56","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-137","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2013\/10\/27\/limerick-of-the-week-137\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (137)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Congratulations to Chris Doyle, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:<\/p>\n

Said a butcher in France slicing ham
\nFor a woman: “I’ll throw in some lamb
\nAnd pastrami for free
\nIf with me you agree
\nTo play hide the salami, madame.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to Chris Doyle yet again, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for a second limerick which received the most Facebook “likes.”<\/p>\n

I’ll be frank: where’s the sugar-cured ham?
\nI’ll be blunt: where’s the glaze on this yam?
\nI’ll be forthright: this beet
\nNeeds a coating that’s sweet.
\n(It’s no secret how candied I am.)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Craig Dykstra, Phyllis LaVietes, Kathy El-Assal, Tom Harris<\/a>, Will T. Laughlin<\/a>, and Tim James. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Craig Dykstra:<\/p>\n

My gramps is forever a ham.
\nHe drops trou and rocks out to a jam.
\nSo last night he\u2019s on Skype
\n(And I don\u2019t mean to gripe)
\nBut he maybe should turn off his cam.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Phyllis LaVietes: <\/p>\n

A woman was roasting a ham
\nMade of soy. She said, “Yes, it’s a sham,
\nBut I’d feel like a dork
\nIf I were to eat pork.
\nI am vegan – I yam what I yam!”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Kathy El-Assal: <\/p>\n

“You are cured,” said the chef to the ham.
\n“Now it’s time for that patient young lamb.”
\nWhile he nursed his red wine,
\nChef looked forward to dine
\nOn paella he’d doctored with clam.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Tom Harris: <\/p>\n

The man was a terrible ham,
\nWhose movie career was a sham.
\nBut he did get one part.
\nHis role: Cut a fart.
\nHe stunk, but went out with a blam!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Will T. Laughlin:<\/p>\n

Mr. Cruz: Both your Green Eggs and Ham
\nDown your mis\u2019rable throat I should cram
\nFor making a game
\nOf my credit and name.
\nRespectfully yours\u2026 Uncle Sam.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Tim James:<\/p>\n

A woman was roasting a ham
\nWhen her gas stove went off with a blam!
\nWith a flash and a roar
\nShe got blown through a door.
\nNow she\u2019s caught in a bit of a jamb.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Will T. Laughlin:<\/p>\n

Said the Chef, \u201cI\u2019ve a very large ham
\nWhich I\u2019m anxious to show you, Madame.
\nThough I\u2019m most at my best
\nWith a plump bit of breast,
\nAnd I do like to chowder a clam!\u201d<\/p>\n

Now, the Chef was a very nice guy.
\n\u2018Twas a meal that he meant, and no lie.
\nHe was truly bereft
\nWhen she slapped him and left,
\nAnd he still doesn\u2019t understand why.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off<\/a>, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n

Filed under Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limerick Writing Contest <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to Chris Doyle, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: Said a butcher in France slicing ham For a woman: “I’ll throw in some lamb And pastrami for […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[42],"tags":[3116,2690,2543,5009,5018,3868,3167,3360,3543,487,523],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22913"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22913"}],"version-history":[{"count":41,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22913\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":23047,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22913\/revisions\/23047"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22913"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22913"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22913"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}