{"id":21382,"date":"2013-06-29T23:44:05","date_gmt":"2013-06-30T03:44:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=21382"},"modified":"2013-06-29T23:52:16","modified_gmt":"2013-06-30T03:52:16","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-120","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2013\/06\/29\/limerick-of-the-week-120\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (120)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Congratulations to Jamie Hutchinson, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:<\/p>\n

A peeping Venetian was fined,
\nSo he hired a lawyer who whined:
\n\u201cYour honor, that maid
\nHad adjusted her shade–
\nIn effect, the Venetian was blind!”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to Scott Crowder, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for this limerick which received the most Facebook “likes.”<\/p>\n

A fellow was trying to find
\nWhy bigots can be so unkind.
\nIt doesn\u2019t take glasses
\nTo see those big asses
\nAre more than a little behind.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to Will T. Laughlin<\/a>, who wins a Limerick Saga Award:<\/p>\n

Mr. Rencible came home to find
\nHis wife and his best friend entwined–
\nMan\u2019s Best Friend<\/em>, I should say,
\nAn enormous Shar-Pei–
\nAnd the sight of it troubled his mind.<\/p>\n

\u201cPlease stop it,\u201d cried poor Mr. Rencible;
\n\u201cBestiality\u2019s quite indefensible.
\nOh, why go to hell
\nFor a sin you can\u2019t spell?
\nMy darling, it just isn\u2019t sensible!\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Colleen Murphy<\/a>, Craig Dykstra, Ailsa McKillop, Steve Whitred<\/a>,
\nTim James, and Danielle Nowlin. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Colleen Murphy: <\/p>\n

I frequently wish I could find
\nThe thoughts I have stored in my mind,
\nBut when I hit play
\nEach thought’s gone away.
\nWhat I need is a stop and rewind.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Craig Dykstra:<\/p>\n

\u201cYou got banned from the dance club and fined?
\nFor tardiness? Why would they mind?\u201d
\n\u201cNo, you misunderstand me–
\nI said that they banned me
\nFor feeling a little behind.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Ailsa McKillop: <\/p>\n

\nA woman was thrilled with her find–
\nA skirt of pure silk, fully lined!
\nIn the thrift shop\u2014dirt cheap!
\nBut oh, she could weep–
\n‘Twas unflatt’ring, when viewed from behind.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Steve Whitred:<\/p>\n

Quite often her fingers would find
\nThere\u2019s a spot where the sun rarely shined,
\nAnd she might have got blisters
\nIf not that the sisters
\nHad warned her, \u201cIt makes you go blind.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Tim James:<\/p>\n

A woman was angered to find
\nWhen driving, and hit from behind,
\nThat the shock of the bump
\nMade her breast implants jump.
\nSo now her front end\u2019s misaligned.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Danielle Nowlin:<\/p>\n

A girl on an airplane did find
\nShe was feeling quite tightly confined.
\nShe asked, “Sir, could you sit
\nWith your seat up a bit?”
\nSaid he rudely, “I’m not too inclined.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off<\/a>, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to Jamie Hutchinson, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: A peeping Venetian was fined, So he hired a lawyer who whined: \u201cYour honor, that maid Had adjusted […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[62,84,3270,1192,1983,65,42],"tags":[3559,2525,2690,3701,3073,5009,5018,2223,3342,3167,3543,487,523],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21382"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21382"}],"version-history":[{"count":28,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21382\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21421,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21382\/revisions\/21421"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21382"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21382"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21382"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}