{"id":20198,"date":"2013-04-14T00:02:38","date_gmt":"2013-04-14T04:02:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/?p=20198"},"modified":"2013-04-14T00:15:29","modified_gmt":"2013-04-14T04:15:29","slug":"limerick-of-the-week-109","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/2013\/04\/14\/limerick-of-the-week-109\/","title":{"rendered":"Limerick of the Week (109)"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Congratulations to Steve Whitred<\/a>, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:<\/p>\n

The ardent date\u2019s blowing his stack
\nCuz his signals were all out of whack.
\nHe said \u201cWhat can I do
\nThat will satisfy you?\u201d
\nSo she asked, \u201cCan you fix me a snack?\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations to Sue Dulley, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for this limerick which received the most Facebook “likes.”<\/p>\n

A reader was offered a stack
\nOf books going several years back.
\nA few were hard cover
\nLike “Lady C’s Lover,”
\nWhile some were soft porn (paperback).\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Diane Groothuis, Jamie Hutchinson, Johanna Richmond, Craig Dykstra, Phyllis Sterling Smith a\/k\/a Granny Smith<\/a>, Sue Dulley, and Will T. Laughlin<\/a> <\/p>\n

Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:<\/p>\n

Diane Groothuis: <\/p>\n

A woman was blowing her stack,
\nCuz her husband did not have the knack
\nOf withholding the gas
\nHe’d repeatedly pass,
\nAnd she said “If I want it I’ll frack”.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Jamie Hutchinson:<\/p>\n

A plumber was blowing her stack
\nAt a fellow who thought her a quack:
\n“The proof’s in my work!
\nAnd anatomy, jerk,
\nIs the reason you can’t see my crack!”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Johanna Richmond: <\/p>\n

A woman was blowing her stack:
\n“I want my virginity back!
\nAfter only one squeeze,
\nHe spilled his valdez.
\nThat romeo isn’t worth jack!”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Craig Dykstra: <\/p>\n

To his wife, the ex-Gov blew his stack
\n\u2018Cause their two-person costume was whack.
\nHe gave her the front
\nAnd said \u201cHate to be blunt
\nBut I\u2019m Ahnuld and so \u2026 I\u2019ll be back.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Phyllis Sterling Smith: <\/p>\n

A woman was blowing her stack
\nWhen she heard that her stalker was back.
\n“When I get up each morn
\nI go garden my corn.
\nI will cut off his stalk with a whack!”\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Sue Dulley: <\/p>\n

A glamorous gal has a stack
\nOf nightgowns, short, silky and black.
\nBut her beau (he’s confessed)
\nLikes her burlap-bag dressed.
\nWhy? “Because she’s the best in the sack.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Will T. Laughlin: <\/p>\n

A fellow was trying to stack
\nHis triplets, each one on its back,
\nSaving trouble and toil
\nFor the visiting mohel–
\nCircumcising all three in one whack.<\/p>\n

(There once was a klutz of a mohel
\nWho sneezed in the midst of his tohel.
\nHe peered down at the boy,
\nThen turned pale, and said: \u201cOy,
\nMrs. Greenbaum? You now have a gohel.\u201d)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.<\/p>\n

In the next couple of minutes I\u2019ll be posting a new Limerick-Off<\/a>, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.<\/p>\n

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter<\/a>. Thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to Steve Whitred, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: The ardent date\u2019s blowing his stack Cuz his signals were all out of whack. He said \u201cWhat can […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[62,84,3270,1192,1983,65,42],"tags":[2690,2747,3073,2065,5009,5018,2046,3342,3369,3543,487,523],"class_list":["post-20198","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-contests","category-limerick-award-winners","category-limerick-competition","category-limerick-contest","category-limerick-of-the-week","category-limerick-writing-contest","category-limericks","tag-craig-dykstra","tag-diane-groothuis","tag-jamie-hutchinson","tag-johanna-richmond","tag-limerick-contest","tag-limerick-of-the-week","tag-phyllis-sterling-smith","tag-steve-whitred","tag-sue-dulley","tag-will-t-laughlin","tag-writing-competitions","tag-writing-contest"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20198","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20198"}],"version-history":[{"count":58,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20198\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20302,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20198\/revisions\/20302"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20198"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20198"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.madkane.com\/humor_blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20198"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}