Comments on: A Limerick Spread (Limerick-Off Monday)

By: Lynn

Lynn — Sun, 16 Sep 2012 04:46:06 +0000

A woman was planning a spread
Fresh butter she’d churned for her bread;
But it fell to the floor
As she walked through the door;
“Well, if that don’t beat all!” she said.

By: madkane

madkane — Sun, 16 Sep 2012 04:14:50 +0000

Thanks very much everyone for your fun limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is... Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner, the Facebook Friends' Choice Award Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners! Limerick of the Week 79. But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Trying Your Hand At Limericks.

By: E. Jerome Koran

E. Jerome Koran — Sat, 15 Sep 2012 22:53:11 +0000

A woman was planning a spread
To be enjoyed with homemade bread
Plants and herbs from gardens and glades
Mushrooms too, with concentrated nightshade
and all who ate it are dead…

By: Dr. Goose

Dr. Goose — Sat, 15 Sep 2012 15:49:04 +0000

A stock trader put on a spread
With calls that were deep in the red.
When the Fed acted funny,
They went in the money,
And exercised nicely instead.

By: Dr. Goose

Dr. Goose — Sat, 15 Sep 2012 15:46:45 +0000

Count Dracula put on a spread
For his friends from among the undead,
While snubbing Van Helsing,
Who said: “It’s a swell thing!
For this group, I’m much too ill-bled.”

By: Dr. Goose

Dr. Goose — Sat, 15 Sep 2012 15:46:04 +0000

A woman was planning a spread
“For the birthday,” she said, “of my Fred.
He’s a sorry schlemiel
Without much appeal,
But surprisingly useful in bed.”

By: Dr. Goose

Dr. Goose — Sat, 15 Sep 2012 15:45:13 +0000

A woman was planning a spread
To substitute butter on bread.
“As a world-famous chemist,”
She boasted, “my premise
Is: this will put hair on your head.”

By: Patti

Patti — Fri, 14 Sep 2012 13:44:22 +0000

A woman was planning a spread,
but was bored with using the bed.
“Instead of me on my back,”
she said, “I’ll try a new tack.”
and attempted to stand on her head.

Well, it was clever, I really must say,
EMTs thought so too, so they say.
But when they answered the call
after her man took a fall,
they suggested she find a new way.

By: Rinkly Rimes

Rinkly Rimes — Thu, 13 Sep 2012 12:10:07 +0000

A fellow was planning a spread
For the birthday of his Uncle Ned.
But his cooking was grim;
It not only killed him,
But ALL of the guests fell down dead!

By: Donna Alexander

Donna Alexander — Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:49:49 +0000

Paul Ryan was planning a spread,
Tea party with Mitt to break bread.
On body and blood,
No lower class crud,
They may dine upon cake instead.