The Five-Second What???
I guess I must have led a very sheltered existence. Why do I say that? Because I’d never heard the phrase “five-second rule” until my husband Mark used it as an excuse to eat some treat he’d just dropped on the floor. (And yes, we’re still married.)
I naively assumed that Mark was the only person crazy enough to think germs politely wait five seconds before they attach themselves to goodies. But apparently lots of people (mostly men, I’m assuming) believe that if you drop food on the floor and pick it up really, really fast, it’s safe to eat.
In fact, the belief’s so widespread that some scientists (who apparently didn’t have anything better to do with their time) actually studied the issue. And yes, they concluded that the rule isn’t valid. (Did you really need me — or the scientists — to tell you that?)
This leads to my latest limerick, in which I use the word date instead of husband to protect the guilty … and because husband has too many damned syllables:
The Five-Second What???
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My date dropped dessert on the dirt.
“Please don’t eat it,” I managed to blurt,
As he started to chew
On his now blackened goo,
Saying “5-second rule — it won’t hurt.”
And now it’s time for another poll:
(You can find more of my marriage humor here and more of my food humor here.)
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And now some links, for your reading (and viewing) pleasure:
* Blog Carnival For Game Designers
* Business Communications Carnival
* Jim Donovan’s Hosting a Fun Poetry Competition
Technorati Tags: Five-Second Rule, Food rules, Science Humor, Scientists, Scientific Studies, Germs, Husbands, Marital Relationships, Dating
August 6th, 2007 at 4:08 pm
Total Mind and Body Fitness Carnival #9…
Monday is Blog Carnivals Day. A Blog Carnival is basically a collection of articles or blog posts, all relating to a similar subject, that are gathered together for your viewing pleasure. You can quickly and conveniently see a list of Article Titles a…
August 6th, 2007 at 5:21 pm
Hey Madeleine!
Thanks for another great article. We’ve included it in our Ninth Edition of the Total Mind and Body Fitness Carnival.
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August 10th, 2007 at 3:40 am
[...] Madeleine Begun Kane presents The Five-Second What??? posted at Mad Kane’s Humor Blog. Madeleine says, I guess I must have led a very sheltered existence. Why do I say that? Because I’d never heard the phrase “five-second rule” until my husband Mark used it as an excuse to eat some treat he’d just dropped on the floor. (And yes, we’re still married.) …” [...]
August 12th, 2007 at 5:54 am
[...] Madeleine Begun Kane presents The Five-Second What??? posted at Mad Kane’s Humor Blog. [...]
August 13th, 2007 at 9:16 am
Storyblogging Carnival LXXVI…
Welcome to the seventy-sixth Storyblogging Carnival. There are eight entries today. Enjoy.
Proceedings
by Jeremiah Lewis of …
January 11th, 2008 at 10:18 pm
Ninth Edition - Men’s Guide to Women January 12, 2008…
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May 2nd, 2008 at 11:59 pm
What a funny post! As a microbiologist I won’t eat something if it fell on the table, let alone the floor! I saw a Myth Busters (on Discovery Channel or TLC) that proved the five second rule to have just as much bacteria prior to five seconds as food after 5 seconds…
Then again as my grandfather would say, “There are children in this world starving…”